“That might be best, sure. I’ll call the ghost hunters and give them a head’s up.”
“Okay, then we’ll see you on the twenty-seventh. Looking forward to meeting you in person.”
I sincerely meant it as I said, “Yeah, me too. Have a safe drive up.”
2
Two days after Christmas, we were on our way to Arkansas. I was pretty happy with the trip, to be honest. I mean, ghosts. Hot springs. What was not to like? I did feel a little bad for dragging my brother along with me, since Don hated the paranormal with a passion. (Which was ironic, considering his psychic lover.) There was a small, petty part of me that would enjoy the show of my brother squirming. You couldn’t love if you didn’t tease, that was my motto. And Donovan braving ghosts for his little blond tickled my funny bone.
Watching my brother with Jon was something of an eye-opening experience. I’d never seen Don in love before, so that was new. Cute as hell, too. If he had a tail, he’d wag it every time he saw Jon. I kept waiting for him to roll over and present his belly for scratches.
But that wasn’t the eye-opening part. It was watching how seamlessly they moved together. I’m sure part of it was Jon’s eyes. He could see a great deal with Don, so it only made sense on his end. But Don was just as good at reading Jon. At anticipating what he would do, what he needed, and it took nothing more than a glance to convey it all. Sometimes not even that. My parents had a healthy, loving relationship, but Jon and Don put them to shame. These two moved as a single unit most of the time.
It made me more than a little envious.
I sat in the back seat of the Humvee—which was a sweet ride—as Jon drove and Don navigated. Jon caught my brother’s hand and laced their fingers together, then drew it up to kiss the back. Don turned his head and smiled at him, a soft expression, glowing with simple happiness. Their hands came to a rest in Jon’s lap and stayed there.
If these two got any sweeter, I’d have to go to a dentist to get the sap drilled out of my teeth.
I’d been nervous about staying around Jon for any length of time, to be honest. I’d heard how much he could see, and right now, there was a lot I wasn’t comfortable talking about. A lot I didn’t want others to know, not until I’d sorted it out in my own head. Having Jon see it all in a look unnerved me. The possibility he’d say something to someone unnerved me even further. But he’d just taken a look, blinked at me, then gave me a reassuring nod. A silent promise that he’d keep all he saw to himself. And he had.
Don did good picking this one.
I let my eyes go toward the window and watched the trees and highway speed past us as we headed west. I didn’t really see it, though. My mind was on the not-so-distant past. Eight months ago, for the first time in my life, I’d felt attracted to a man. Talk about a shock to the system. Thirty-two years old and suddenly realizing you’re not quite as straight as you’d believed. I hadn’t been sure what to do with the revelation. I wasn’t worried about my family, obviously. Don had known he was bisexual for decades, and his sexual orientation had been wholly accepted. And we all liked Jon. My parents adored him. I wasn’t worried about the reception I’d get if I announced I was something other than straight.
It was just weird to realize I was bisexual all this time.
I’d made the mistake of getting drunk with a buddy on the team and spilling the beans. He’d not taken it well. And worse, he’d blabbed to everyone else who would listen. Overnight, I had people either giving me the side-eye or being indignant on my behalf. It led to a pitched battle of opinions, and work turned into a battlefield. I’d hated going to the station.
When the official offer from the FBI came in, I’d leapt on it and hadn’t taken a backwards glance. Anything to escape that hellish atmosphere. But it didn’t really resolve my personal revelation. Was I bisexual? Could I assume that after meeting one man I’d wanted to have sex with? Or was I something else entirely?
This wasn’t supposed to be confusing at my age, dammit.
We stopped at a rest station for a bathroom break and to stretch our legs. Jon came out about the same time as I did, but neither of us got into the Humvee immediately. We meandered down the short sidewalk to the grassy area and enjoyed standing for a bit. It was picturesque out here with the thick tree line and dusting of ice on everything. It hadn’t snowed, but the ice did give that wintery feeling. It was cold enough our breath formed white clouds in the air.
“Might be better for you if you talked it out instead of letting it fester in your head,” he said without any segue.
I looked at Jon sharply. “I thought you weren’t a telepath.”
Jon snorted, his blue eyes sparkling with silent amusement. “Hardly need to be. I could see the wheels turning even from the front seat.”
Strangely, I felt like I could confide in him. Despite us not really knowing each other well, he had that vibe that said I could tell him anything and not be judged for it. Maybe because he’d already kept my confidence so well without me needing to ask. “When you read me, what do you see for my sexuality?”
“Bisexual,” he answered without hesitation. “And discomfort about it.”
“That hit the nail on the head,” I grumbled, for lack of a better response. Bisexual, huh? The confirmation was comforting. Maybe. Still weird.
“I think you’re laboring under a misconception, Brandon.” Jon turned to face me directly, those penetrating blue eyes seeming to see right through me. “Your brother might have given you the wrong impression. Most bisexual people aren’t fifty-fifty. They’re skewed; they normally favor one gender over the other. Donovan’s the odd one.”
My head came up sharply. Really? I’d honestly not looked into it. Donovan had always been so open about whatever he thought or felt, I assumed I knew what it meant to be bisexual. It didn’t occur to me to do any research on it. This news gave me a sense of ease. “Eight months ago, for the first time ever, I met a man I wanted to date. It was weird. I didn’t know what to do with that feeling. I thought I was straight up until that point. And I haven’t met another man since I thought the same thing of. But that’s normal?”
Jon shrugged casually, as if this was no big deal. “Yes. It just means you’re very skewed to one gender. Nothing wrong with that.”
I let out a huge breath I wasn’t aware I’d been holding, feeling like he’d just lifted a grindstone off my neck. “Damn. Just…damn.”
He gave me an understanding smile. “There, see? Better to have it out in the air, right?”
“All this time, I felt like something was off with me. Because it didn’t make any sense. And suddenly realizing I didn’t know myself as well as I thought I did, that was an unpleasant shock to the system.” Of course, he knew all that. Still, he listened to me patiently, never taking his eyes off of me. Don really had done well, picking this one to fall for. “Jon, I feel like I ought to hug you.”
“By all means. I never turn down hugs.”
I wrapped him up in both arms, hugging him strongly enough to lift him off his feet, and he sighed happily against my chest. “I love Havili hugs. Your whole family gives the best hugs.”