“I didn’t know that, actually. I thought it had just been Beast that had gotten hurt.”
Lola shook her head, a sad smile coming to her face, and fresh guilt blossomed at how I was using her. “No, Echo was shot and killed right away. That meant that Beast got everything that was intended for the both of them.” She leaned in. “Truth is, I don’t think anyone expected Beast to survive. I heard that there were over three hundred cuts and burns on his body alone.” She looked back to her drink. “How does someone survive that?”
Three hundred.
The number danced around my head like a taunt.
I’d seen his body. The cuts and the bruises. The burns, slices, the broken ribs. But I’d never counted and I’d never thought to think too hard on how he’d gotten them. Jenna had trained me to see past the story and go directly to the person so I could help them. And that’s what I’d done.
I thought about Beast and the sort of man he was. All the anger and hate he carried with him. He was trapped in a pit of vipers ready to attack, but the vipers weren’t snakes at all, they were his memories of that night. All his rage and anger suddenly made so much more sense.
“They don’t,” I replied. “I guess they have to become someone else to survive it.”
Lola nodded sadly. “It’s quiet around here today, maybe you could keep me company,” she said. “I’m supposed to keep the men company, but they’re all super busy.” Her gaze went wistful. “They always seem to be super busy these days.”
My mouth went dry, my tongue flaccid in my mouth as I willed it to move so I could get my words out and ask some questions. Knowing more about what had happened to Beast didn’t help me. In fact, it only served to terrify me even more than I already was. But the more I tried to talk, to get my tongue to move, the more it refused to budge. I coughed, and then coughed some more, startling Lola into action. She slid off her stool and headed behind the bar quickly, popping the lid off a bottle of beer with the edge of the bar and handing it to me. I took it, drinking greedily.
“Thank you,” I finally gasped, wiping the back of my hand across my damp lips. “I needed that.” And I did. I longed to drink myself into oblivion so I could forget about the awful situation I was currently in. So I didn’t have to think about how there was no escaping my fate, or Beast’s—only delaying it.
I’d drunk practically the whole bottle in one go, but I hadn’t eaten right in days and it would go straight to my head if I wasn’t careful, and I couldn’t afford to get drunk. If I got drunk, something might slip out about what was happening, and that would put Jenna in danger.
“I need to get back,” I mumbled.
I put the bottle back down and turned to leave. I couldn’t do this. Guilt and fear were warring in me. Shame at what I was doing was eating away at my insides and liquefying them.
“Send him my love,” Lola called as I stumbled away.
I threw a backward glance at her and nodded.
“They’re close to catching the guys that did this,” she said.
I stopped walking and turned to face her, a smile touching the edges of my mouth.
“Really?” I said, the word barely a breath on my lips.
“Oh yeah, I heard Casa and Gauge talking earlier. They know who it was, they’re just setting it all up to bring them down now.” She looked pleased with herself. Pleased that she’d finally piqued my interest with something.
Lola came toward me, and my heart rattled in my chest, fear and excitement bubbling through me. Excitement because if they knew who it was they could catch them before I had to do anything. But fear because they might find out about me and kill me anyway.
“I heard you and Beast hooked up at the hospital,” she said, her gaze drifting over my shoulder toward Beast’s door.
My cheeks flamed in embarrassment. “I’m so sorry,” I said, realizing that she actually might be pissed off at me because she was already sleeping with him. “It just sort of happened, but he’s all yours. I wasn’t trying to come between you two.”
My blush deepened.
I couldn’t believe I’d just said that.
Lola was stunning. Curvy, tall, long flowing hair, big boobs—she could have any man she wanted. Of course he was all hers. He was never mine to begin with.
Lola laughed. “Oh, that’s okay. Beast and I aren’t an item or anything. I was just wondering if it was any good is all.”
“Any good?”
“The sex.”
My cheeks were going to self-combust at this rate.
“Umm.”
“Beast always had the best dick around here,” she said wistfully. “If there was any man that was going to bring me to orgasm in thirty seconds flat, it was him. It was like magic or something.” She giggled like a little girl again. “Like a magic dick!”
I was mortified at the conversation, but I got where she was going with it. Beast had been the perfect man in bed. He’d satisfied me repeatedly without even trying. His look alone had almost brought me to my knees.
I forced a small, shy laugh. “Yeah, that sounds about right.”
“So, he’s all good now then?” she said, a hungry look on her face. “And you two, you’re not a thing?”
I finally got where the conversation was going, my heart stuttering in my chest.
I looked back toward Beast’s door, thinking of how I’d washed his chest earlier. Ran my hands through his hair as I combed it and tied it back. Applied cream to his skin, my hands moving over his body and his barely concealed erection at my every touch. But he wasn’t mine. He was never mine. And maybe a little time with Lola would actually help him.
Despite my jealousy, I shook my head. “He’s all good down there,” I said, the words barely making it past my lips. “You should go check on him.”
Her face lit up like the Fourth of July. “Oh my god, thank you! We had a little thing a couple of weeks ago, and he was pissed at me and I just want to show him that there’s no hard feelings between us. Ya know?”
“Go right ahead. I’ll wait out here,” I mumbled.
Lola squealed and hugged me again before sauntering off toward Beast’s room. I slid onto her stool, watching as she cracked the door open and gave a little wave to him before she stepped inside. I picked up my beer bottle and finished the contents, but one beer was never going to be enough. I walked around the bar, my thoughts on Mateo and the devilish look he’d had on his face the night before as I grabbed another bottle from the fridge. He’d pinned me to the bed and thumped me so hard in the stomach that I thought I’d be coughing up blood. The look on his face was something out of a movie. The more I cried, the more satisfied he looked and the hungrier and turned on he’d appeared for more of them.
My hand went instinctively to my stomach again; the pain was awful. Every move I made sent pain through me. I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t stretch. I couldn’t walk without the pain threading through my spine. My gaze dropped to the bottle in my hands and I wondered how much pain he’d put Beast through to make him so hard. I’d seen the scars, I’d tended to his wounds, but the pain…God, the pain must have been incredible, and yet he was still here. He just got on with it. He just dealt with it. I was spineless and pathetic, I realized. A couple of threats and a punch to the stomach and I was ready to turn on him.