“I want you. I want us to be together. I want to make it official. It pretty much is now, isn’t it? We’re together. Let’s say that. I love you. And I think you’re in love with me, too. Let’s say fuck the world, and whatever we do now, we do together.”
He didn’t look at me, didn’t turn. I waited. And waited, dread starting to settle on my shoulders. What was happening here? Why wasn’t he saying anything? My heart fell into my stomach, the knowledge that something very bad was about to happen settled on my shoulders. Finally, he turned around.
“Really?” He sighed. “We talked about this, Layla. Do you have to be this girl? I thought you’d come so much further than this, and it’s just…such a disappointment. I told you. I don’t do love. I don’t do relationships. I’m not that guy. I just don’t care about people like that, and if you convinced yourself that I do, that’s not my fault. You knew the rules when we started this.”
My body went numb. I could actually feel nothing. “You and I both know that’s not true. Why are you doing this? I’ve seen how you feel. I know I did.”
“Fanciful nothingness, Layla. You really are young. When a person tells you he can’t fall in love, believe him. We know ourselves. If I wanted to be married, I’d have done it years ago.”
I backed up two steps. “You’re lying.”
“I’m telling the truth. If you don’t like what I’m saying, that’s on you.”
I couldn’t take any more. He had explained things, but I’d…I’d thought they changed. A million different ways. All the time we’d spent together. He’d been so gentle, so kind with me. Loving. That couldn’t be nothing.
I ran from the room. I’d probably hate myself for it later, but that was what I did. I had to get away from how he looked at me like I was nothing. I closed his door behind me. I didn’t even know why I did that. I just…had to.
I walked like a zombie to my room, closing that door, too. Methodically, I started to pack. I would only take the things I’d brought with me. Everything else would stay. He’d bought it. I didn’t want it. No. Nothing I’d done here would come with me.
Was my father right? Was I just one of a lot of women who fell in love with him? Was that why Isobel had stopped going to the café? We never saw her anymore. I shook my head. No, he was a four-day guy. We’d been together…five weeks. But maybe that was just because I was living in his house and he’d had no choice. Better to fuck me than not.
Tears started to stream, but it was like I couldn’t feel them. Toothbrush, check. Hairbrush, check. I had all my things. I closed the suitcase. Zipped. I had everything I’d come with. Passport was where I always stored it in the front pocket. I could go, now.
I could leave France. Zeke.
That was what I had to do.
Because I was nothing to him. I’d totally humiliated myself.
But I’d seen his love for me. I knew I had.
No, he was right. I’d made it up. I even knew why. I clearly needed love, clearly was desperate for it. Clearly had daddy issues.
I rolled the suitcase. My father was headed to get Justin somewhere, and he’d stopped here. Now was the time to go back to NYC and see my sisters. They’d help me. I wouldn’t stay there. Too close to my father, but I’d borrow money—I was already in debt up to my ears with my father—and move on. Maybe I’d move to Hawaii. I could paint on the beach. No, that wouldn’t work. I was a redhead. We burned.
Maybe I’d go to Alaska.
Somewhere.
I rolled the suitcase down the stairs as a crash in Zeke’s room caught my attention. It sounded like something had hit the wall. Not my problem. He didn’t love me.
I made it to the door when I was stopped by security. “Ma’am?” My kind, British guard spoke to me. “Are you okay?”
How much had he heard? It didn’t matter. Humiliation came in large doses for me. “I need to go to the airport. I have to get to New York City.”
He nodded. “Do you have a ticket?”
Oh right, I’d need one of those. There I was again. Stupid Layla.
He took out his phone. “I’ll get you one.”
That sounded good. I couldn’t perform basic things right now. “Can we do it outside?”
I needed out of this ugly downstairs. I never wanted to see it again. I had to step away from here. Now.
He gestured forward, and I went through the door. It was raining slightly. Zeke’s security guard stepped out. “Miss? Are you okay?”
Why were they all asking? Oh, I was gasping for breath and crying, still in my running clothes. Plus, they’d all have seen that scene on the street. I walked to the street. “Thank you for everything, I’m leaving for America.”
His face fell. “No, I hope not.”
“Yes, it seems it’s time.” I rocked back on my feet, the ants feeling coming back. Who was looking at me now? I glanced around. No one.
A car screeched to a stop in front of Zeke’s house, and we all turned to look at it at the same time. Men with machine guns ran from the car shouting in a language I didn’t know. My reflexes were slow as I tried to throw myself to the ground, but one of the armed men grabbed me by the hair, yanking hard against me as he yelled. They shouted and shot. The guard went down first, and I stumbled to keep upright. My security got a shot off before he also went down. Something slammed behind me, but I couldn’t see it as I was shoved into the car, a bag put over my head.
I cried out, but it was no use. The car was moving.
They talked to me and talked to me, but never in English. I didn’t know if they didn’t know, or they just liked torturing me with the fact that I hadn’t a clue what was going on. Maybe ignorance was better in this case.
I sat on a couch. When I needed to pee, they let me. When I needed to eat, they fed me. And laughed at me.
I didn’t think these were fans of mine who were just nuts. No, this had to do with the Allards. And my father. And all the things Zeke had been worried about. Zeke. I couldn’t let myself think about him. It was too hard.
These guys were going to want money for me, and my father was done. Did that mean I was outright screwed? Day turned to night then day again. Then night. This time, they shaved my head.
It was bizarre. One of them held me down, the other did the deed. It could have been worse. It was just hair, but still, it felt like they’d taken a lot more than that from me. Something else, something I couldn’t have named if I’d been forced to.
I dozed on the uncomfortable couch, jolting with every noise, when one I didn’t recognize took my attention. What was that sound? I didn’t know.
Then there was chaos. Gunfire. I hit the ground, covering my head. Not that it would stop a bullet. I didn’t know what to do. Who was here? What was happening?
Strong hands pulled me up, and I recognized Michael Li immediately. “M-Michael,” I managed to get out.
“That’s right, kid. I’ve got you. You’re okay. You’re safe now.” He hugged me, which was so not a Michael thing to do, but I was so grateful for it, I hugged him back.
“I…” Talking was hard. “They took me.”