“I know, and I love you too. That’s why I brought you coffee. And I’m not delusional enough to think that you will ever really like him. I just hoped that you would try to get to know him instead of letting other people make up your mind. You’re usually not such a follower.” She had always done things on her own and her own way.
Clara sighed. “Layla is my friend. I have to trust her.”
“She told you about it herself? You didn’t hear about it from others?”
She gave me a sideward look but said nothing.
“I’m serious, Clara. What if I told you that he admitted to me the truth about the rumors and that he says he wants to do better with me? Isn’t he worth a second chance?”
“I’d say it was a line to get in your pants and that you’re too smart to fall for that.” She walked over to the kitchen counter, where she cut me a brownie and placed it on the napkin. “I saved you a corner piece. They’re nice and chewy.”
I wasn’t going to refuse my chocolatey favorite. “Thanks,” I said, noticing there were only two missing from the pan. She was trying so hard to butter me up. “Don’t you think that people can change?” I felt like it was the same old story with us lately, like every visit had to include a debate.
“No, not everyone can change. Not people who don’t want to. And I can’t believe that someone like Seth would want to when he is obviously having the time of his life. People like him don’t care what kind of attention they get, as long as they get it. He probably wears those rumors like a badge of honor.”
I sighed, but she interrupted my next thought. “Look, Avery. I don’t want to fight about it. You know how I feel, and that’s not changing. Not unless he stepped up and proved it. And I don’t see someone like him doing that.”
“Someone like him?” I shook my head. “You’re right. We need to change the subject.” I wasn’t going to sit there and listen to her insult him.
“You’re right. I have a million things I wanted to say besides ‘I’m sorry I hate your infatuation.’ Like my wedding, for instance. I talked to Mom, and she said that I could wear her wedding dress if I didn’t think it was bad luck.”
“Well, it didn’t bring her any,” I mumbled.
Clara chuckled. “At this point, I’m more worried about going broke than bad luck, and besides, I’ve always wanted to wear it.”
“Someone should. The damned thing is too frilly for me. Besides, I’m going to do something a little less traditional and formal.”
Clara smiled. “That’s exactly what Mom said. I swear you sound just like her sometimes.”
“That’s better than sounding like Dad,” I said, which Clara did more than I’d tell her. She would deny it anyway.
“Speaking of the devil, he’s trying to give me money. I don’t want to take it, so he’s bothering me about it. I told you his approval comes with a price.”
It wasn’t that I wanted his approval, but I just didn’t see any reason for making conflict where there was none. “Take the money. There’s no sense in going without the things you need, and you can use it for the wedding. He’s supposed to pay for that anyway, isn’t he?”
“Oh, no. I told him we’re making it just fine. I don’t need a super expensive wedding. Besides, it’s months and months away.” She waved her hand dismissively. “I have other things to worry about in the meantime.”
“Tell him to send it my way. I’m the one you cleaned out, and I could stand a shopping spree.” Looking around the apartment, it looked like she had everything she needed. “The place is looking great by the way.”
“Thanks,” said Clara as she sat on the couch. “Have you talked to him any more about getting a roommate?”
Our father had never let us share our apartment with an extra roommate, even when we needed the extra money.
“You know how it is with Dad.”
“Don’t I?” she said, pulling the throw over her thin legs. “But he might change his mind with me moving out. You could tell him that it will be safer for you not to live alone.”
“I will, but I have to find him in the right mood.”
“Well, I think you should find someone. You shouldn’t be staying there all alone, and I worry about you.” Clara was always worried about me for some reason. Sometimes, I thought she worried about me more than our parents did.
I knew it had to do with her past trauma, so I tried to lighten the mood. “You weren’t so worried about me when you decided to move out. And just in case you’re getting any crazy thoughts, no, you can’t move back in.”
“Not me, but maybe a friend,” she said. “And I don’t mean one with a penis.”
“That’s not fair. Your roommate has a penis.”
Clara smiled. “Mmm, indeed, he does.”
My face turned red as it contorted. The last thing I wanted to think about was my sister and Dillon in bed together. “Eww, gross. I don’t need the commentary or the mental image.”
“Keep on, and I’m going to give you the play by play.” Clara gave me a teasing, sinister look, but I knew better. She would rather die than have anyone think that about her.
It was time to change the subject. “I don’t know anyone who would want to move in.”
“Doesn’t your friend Abigail live in the dorms?”
“If she hasn’t been tossed out or murdered yet. She’s a bit loud with her music, and while I adore her, I’m not sure I’d want to live with her.”
“Like living with you was a piece of cake,” Clara said, rolling her eyes. I looked down and noticed she’d only taken one bite of her brownie.
“You should finish that,” I said, popping the top off of my to-go coffee. “Try dunking it. You’ll love it. The chocolate and the coffee flavor are a perfect match.”
“Just like Dillon and me.” Clara sighed. She took the lid off of her cup and dunked her brownie before taking a small bite of it. “You’re right. It’s really good.”
I continued to watch her, waiting for her to take another bite. But she put the brownie down instead and held her middle.
“I’ll just take my time with that,” she said, noticing my disappointment. “It’s tough filling your gut full of food when you’re not used to it. I have to eat a bit slower than normal, especially when it comes to junk food, or I’ll get sick.”
“I can make you something off of the menu the doctor gave you, or I could go uptown and find you something.” I wanted to help her in any way I could, as long as she would eat. I was always so scared of losing her, and if she didn’t keep her strength up, I still could.
“You’re spoiling me,” she said. “And policing me. I’m good, officer. I’m not hungry right now. But I will be later.”
“And you’ll eat?” I needed her to give me her word.
“Of course. I have been doing better, believe it or not. I’ve gained weight, and the doctor says I’m getting my strength back. There’s nothing to worry about. So stop doting over me. It’s driving me nuts.”