Losing her had ruined me. It was like slow suicide. More than once, I jumped into my car to go drag her from Michael’s. I still considered her mine. Nothing could change that but divorce and a restraining order. Because I fucking loved her.
I loved her.
It was the only reason I hadn’t stormed Michael’s home. She had to choose, and I hoped to hell she’d choose me. I desperately needed her. I looked for ways to keep her, and thought of her grief over Daniel. That I had no self-awareness. I hurt people.
She was right, so I spent the week performing good deeds. I sent flowers to Queenie with a nice message. If James were alive, I would’ve put him in jail, but since he wasn’t, I called the Bourton dean and told him someone I knew was sexually assaulted at James’ fraternity. The next day it was shut down. The news outlets rolled with a storm of articles condemning campus rape and the Greek system’s toxicity combined with grisly stories from Bourton alumni.
Why did I want to help?
I felt closer to Liana when I was less of an asshole. It made me drive through Boston aimlessly until I stopped at Alessio’s house. I hadn’t been here in ages.
Heavy rain drenched my shoulders before I’d stepped through the iron-wrought gate. The red door swung open as I reached the gables.
Alessio walked out, his dark eyes narrowing as I approached. He crossed his arms.
“What the hell are you doing here?”
Honestly, I don’t know. “I wanted to talk to you and Mia.”
Alessio’s mouth twisted. He had good reason for hating that idea. I’d kidnapped his wife a couple of years ago. I’d rationalized it by telling myself I was saving her. I’d only done it to lure him out, so I could kill him and succeed him as boss.
“I don’t want you anywhere near Mia.” His baritone cooled to a condescending whisper. “Jesus, you look like a fucking wreck.”
The red door yawned again, and the pint-sized Mia popped under Alessio’s arm, cradling their toddler daughter. A deep frown creased her forehead.
“Oh, it’s you,” she said, her greeting steeped in reproach. “What do you want?”
Coming here had been a desperate move.
I waved aside my hesitation and inhaled deeply. “I let you both down, and I’m sorry. I fucked up, and I’m here to make amends.”
Alessio looked like Christmas had come early. He flashed me a wintry smile, sneering. “What is this, some twelve-step bullshit? You don’t give a damn about us.”
“Then why am I standing in the rain?”
He shook his head. “Go home, Vinn.”
“I can’t. I have to do something.” If it would ease the weight crushing my heart, I’d do anything.
Alessio’s smirk carved a dimple into his cheek. His black eyes drilled into me.
“She dumped you, didn’t she?”
The fire consuming me dampened.
What if she had?
Alessio folded his arms, grinning like the cat that ate a cage of canaries. “Well, it’s about time. That girl is way too good for you.”
I turned away, my stomach boiling.
Mia descended the steps, ignoring her husband’s warning. She bit her lip. “She left you?”
A pang hit the back of my throat. I couldn’t bring myself to answer, because saying it out loud would make it permanent.
“Boy, you’re really hurting.” Alessio’s dark gaze searched me, lapping up my misery like it was gold. “I have to say, seeing you in agony is nice.”
Mia’s toddler squealed, and Mia passed the baby to Alessio. His face lit up as he shifted, hoisting her. He kissed her. She beamed at him, and a sledgehammer hit my chest.
An ache pulsed inside me, new and terrifying, but real. I gritted my teeth. I raked my hair, tearing away from the infuriating sight of their wholesome happiness.
I bolted down the path.
“Wait. Vinn, hold on.” Mia jogged to my side, stopping me. “Come back.”
“Mia, let him go.”
She frowned at her husband. “It doesn’t hurt to hear him out.”
Alessio released an exaggerated sigh and waved me forward.
“I’m tired of butting heads with you, so name your fucking price.”
“Fine.” Alessio rolled his eyes. “Make me partner in all your construction firms.”
I glowered at him. “That’s a big ask.”
“Hey, you’re the one seeking amends.”
He’d thrown that out to test me, but my anguish was so acute it punctured my lungs with every breath.
I sighed. “Fuck. Fine.”
His laughter grated my ears. “Seriously?”
“I’ll make you a managing partner. You’ll have executive powers.”
“I don’t care about that,” he snapped. “I just want your money.”
“I’ll give you a twenty-percent stake.”
“Thirty-five,” he shot.
“Twenty-five.”
Alessio shrugged and offered me a hand. “Deal.”
I shook it, as an inner voice screamed. By far, the worst deal I’d ever made, but it’d be worth it if it convinced Liana I wasn’t a hopeless asshole.
He held onto me, smirking. “Having a conscience gets expensive, doesn’t it?”
You have no idea.
My gaze slid to his wife. “What about you?”
“Ask him for another twenty-five, honey.”
Mia ignored her husband and smiled at me. “I don’t need anything, Vinn. I forgive you.”
Alessio tutted. “Terrible negotiator.”
I stepped back, well aware I’d signed over hundreds of thousands of dollars. “So we’re good?”
“Yeah,” Alessio muttered after a long pause. “I think so.”
“Maybe I’ll have you both over some time.”
Alessio quirked an eyebrow. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”
Mia thumped his chest. “We’d love that.”
“I’ll see you guys later. Have a nice night.”
They gaped at me like I’d said something in a foreign language. As I walked to the car, my loafers drenched, I waited for a weight to lift off my shoulders. Intense nausea and desolation swept over me.
Nothing had changed.
The next few hours were pure torture. It somehow topped being shot, stabbed, and dragged to a mock-execution, because at least she’d still been in my life. I couldn’t inhale without a stitch in my ribs. All I’d done since I got home was stare at photos of my wife.
I missed her.
A fist hammered my door.
I tossed my phone aside and yanked it open.
Michael stood in the doorway, his shirt half-untucked, his hair askew like he’d spent the ride to my place clenching it, and darkness billowed over him like a rolling storm. He stepped in, radiating a corrosive contempt that fouled the air.
“Is Liana with you?”
I was so damned pathetic.
“Why, so you can break up with her again?”
He shoved me.
My back hit the console table, pain slicing my spine. He punched my face. Agony exploded across my jaw. My teeth ached. My world spun. Two savage blows knocked out my breath. He’d never hit me like this, even at our worst.