“You’re delusional.”
“Am I?” He releases my face and his fingers drop down to my collarbone. Every contact of his skin against mine is like a scorching fire.
And like any fire, ashes is the only thing he’ll leave behind.
“Leave me the hell alone,” I hiss.
“I told you. I can’t.”
He yanks the towel down, exposing the scar and my pale breasts.
It’s a miracle that I keep the towel fastened around my middle. Or maybe I only keep it because he allows it.
He wraps his thumb and forefinger around my nipple and squeezes hard.
A zapping sensation shoots straight to my core and I close my eyes with shame.
“Your nipples are so hard.” He squeezes some more until a whimper leaves my lips. “See? They’re all tight and sensitive so maybe they like the opposite of nice, too.”
I purse my lips together, scared that an alien sound would come out.
“Fuck.” His metallic eyes fill with wonder.
He continues pinching and twirling my nipple, but it’s not his focus. His entire attention is on the angry red marks he left around my scar.
Biting down the sensations going through my body, I stare, incredulous. “Do you get off on causing people pain?”
His gaze reluctantly leaves my chest to meet my eyes. A sheen of indifference covers his features, sealing whatever interest sparked earlier. “Are you in pain?”
“No, but I’m uncomfortable. Spare me your attention.”
“Why?” He pinches my nipple hard.
My lips tremble as I try to gather my wits around me. “You’re toxic. And oh, you ruined my life for two years.”
He leans over, lips ghosting on the shell of my ear sending chills to the bottom of my stomach as he whispers, “Not enough.”
“What have I done to you?” My voice trembles around the words.
“You exist.”
Tears rim my eyes at his words.
Somewhere deep inside, I agree with Kim. Aiden doesn’t bully anyone else in school — not even her. He doesn’t go out of his way to trap others as he does me.
“Why me?” I shout. “Why the fuck is it my life you decided to ruin? Was it a toss of a coin? Did you wake up that day and decided it would be me?”
His hand wraps around my neck and he squeezes. It’s tight enough to make me beg for air and show that he’s the one in control.
That he can in any second squeeze the life out of me.
“Do you think I was destroying you?” he asks with a dark voice. “You’ve seen nothing, Frozen.”
I try to push at his chest, but he reaches his free hand to my nipple and pinches it while squeezing my neck harder.
I can’t breathe.
I can’t freaking breathe.
My lungs choke on non-existent air as I thrash and claw at his hand and arms.
My eyes bulge, feeling every nerve ending tingling. Lightheadedness grips me and everything turns hazy.
“The more you fight, the harder I squeeze.” He swipes his tongue along my parted bottom lip and whispers against my mouth, “You’re smart, aren’t you, sweetheart?”
My hands tremble as I drop them to either side of me.
He loosens his hand the slightest bit to allow some air in. I gulp it greedily, my lungs and eyes burning with oxygen.
“Good girl,” he twirls his thumb over my nipple as I tremble with tiny bursts of breath.
“You could’ve stayed away, Frozen.” His voice is dark and chilling like a moonless night. “But you had to start the war.”
What…?
“Elsa?” Coach Nessrine calls from the door.
Her footsteps come closer with each passing second.
My face heats and panic grips me by the gut. If she finds me with Aiden, I can kiss my clean, perfect record goodbye. I will endanger Cambridge and everything I’ve worked for.
Aiden releases me and strides to the window. He throws me one last indecipherable look before he jumps down and disappears.
I release a shaky breath as I pull the towel up my body. My legs are trembling and barely holding me upright.
Coach Nessrine comes into view. “Is everything all right?”
“Yeah,” I whisper.
Not really.
Not at all.
Chapter Eleven
Aunt Blair and I switch from a side plank to a meditation position.
Eyes closed, we just feel.
The sound of the birds chirping in the trees fills my ears like soothing music. The humid air sticks to my cheeks and ruffles my hair back.
For as long as I remember, Aunt and I have shared this moment of inner peace.
The only difference is that I can’t focus right now.
The confrontation I had with Aiden in the locker room yesterday keeps replaying in the back of my mind like a recurring nightmare.
My skin prickles with unease.
Or is it unease?
My body didn’t forget how close he got. How he touched me like he had every right to.
Since my return to school this year, everything has been spiralling out of control. The inner peace I’ve been doing my best to protect is being chipped, chewed, and thrown out. Or maybe it’s been crumbling for the past two years while I’ve been doing my best to be strong.
Or the ten years before that.
Damn Aiden to the darkest pits of hell.
He’s stirring a part I’ve been keeping under wraps from everyone. Hell, I’ve been shielding myself from that part, too.
Haunted memories.
Excruciating pain.
Dead eyes.
Every time I stare into his smoky gaze, I see a hint of the darkness I left behind. I’ll be damned if I let him or anyone else force me to remember that nightmare.
“Elsie?”
My eyes snap open to find Aunt sitting cross-legged in front of me. She’s staring at my clenched fists with furrowed brows.
“The idea is to relax.” She’s smiling but concern is etched on her creased brow. No wrinkles whatsoever.
Aunt is an ageless beauty, basically.
Her face hasn’t changed an inch since that day she took my small hand in hers and promised me a new life.
People believe in guardian angels, I believe in Aunt Blair and Uncle Jaxon.
“Sorry,” I smile back and take the bottle of mineral water she offers. “I’ve been thinking about a test.”
I do have a math test, but that’s not what’s occupying me right now.
Ugh. I hate lying to my aunt.
She pushes my bangs off of my forehead and behind my ear. Aunt and I are in yoga trousers. She’s wearing a sports bra while I’m in a sleeveless top. She shifted her mat so we’re facing each other instead of the green scenery of our back garden.
“You know we’re proud of you no matter what you do, right? It doesn’t have to be Cambridge if you don’t want to.” Her smile is warm but also pained.
Sometimes, I wonder if she sees my mother in my face. I’m becoming more and more a carbon copy of her.
“Blasphemy,” I laugh. “Don’t let Uncle Jaxon hear you say the words ‘no Cambridge’. Besides, I want Cambridge, Aunt. It’s my dream.”
She rolls her wedding band. “Don’t tell Jaxon and we’ll eat ice cream while watching a cheesy chick flick until we pass out.”