Blood was dripping from her severed head. My hands were shaking so hard, I could hardly hold the picture. I dropped it on the ground and fell to my knees.
It didn't take long for me to bring up my breakfast onto the stones. Grief and revulsion had overtaken me.
Had I actually touched that monster last night, the man who killed my sister? I must have been out of my mind to doubt that he was a monster.
The photograph had completely renewed my rage, my fury.
Samael was the Angel of Death, of divine wrath. And now he would feel mortal wrath.
I felt a darkness sliding through me, a deep hunger for vengeance. This wasn't just about my country anymore. He'd murdered someone I loved, ruined my family. And how many other lives had he destroyed, because the angels believed they were better than us mortals? That they needed to reign over the chaos of man?
They really didn't care if we lived or died, as long as it suited their needs.
I wanted to scrub my entire body clean of his touch. But there wasn't time for that right now, because more than anything I had to leave here. I had to hope that what we’d done last night was enough of a seduction, because there was no way I was going near him again.
As the haze of horror thinned a little in my mind, I realized there was another piece of paper with the photograph.
More drawings from Finn. He’d carefully drawn a picture of his market stall, with the petticoats hung up.
Beneath that, he’d drawn an hourglass and a lightning bolt, the symbol of the Free Men. If I understood this correctly, he wanted me to meet him at the market stall as soon as possible. Time was of the essence. And then, he would give me some kind of message from the Free Men.
I took another minute to try to compose myself. Running wildly out of here in this mental state was a recipe for disaster. If I didn’t steady my nerves, I’d find myself wandering around the courtyard, ranting and tearing my hair out. For Alice’s sake, I needed to master control of my emotions.
I closed my eyes, taking deep, calming breaths. I focused on the feel of the sunlight on my skin, and I tried to block out the image of what I'd just seen. When the trembling in my body had subsided, I crouched down again.
I picked up the note and the photograph, and pulled a little matchbox out of my pocket. I burned both pieces of paper. For one thing, I couldn't be caught with these. If a soldier were to find me, it would lead them back to the Free Men. And for another thing, I wanted that photograph to be burned out of existence. A photograph like that should simply not exist at all.
As I watched Samael's image burn on the ground, I thought of his body in flames. He needed to die for what he’d done.
When I'd finished burning the papers, I stepped back into the archway. I closed my eyes, thinking of the one thing that calmed me the most: the night sky. I imagined the stars shining, the sense of freedom in the darkness, plants growing wild beneath my feet under a cloak of night.
Then I knocked against the stone next to me, and said a prayer to the Raven King. I felt his spirit had been my guardian this whole time. A rush of cool wind over me felt like an answer from his ghost.
And with that, I felt a sense of calm, of purpose. I was clear-headed again, like this was a holy mission.
I knelt down, blowing away the ashes from the burned paper and photograph. Carefully, I peeked out from the archway to see if the coast was clear.
From here, I could simply scale the outer wall unnoticed. On that part of the wall, I would be out of view of the guards who protected the entrances. I supposed right now it was a good thing that this place was ridiculously enormous. Nobody would be able to see me there.
So I ran for the wall, and started climbing. I slid my fingers into the little cracks between the rocks, hoisting myself up one stone at a time, moving swiftly.
Whatever happened next, I would fight most of all for Alice. She’d deserved better than a gory death at the hands of a monster.
My arms and legs burned as I climbed, but I was moving quicker than I ever had. When I reached the top of the wall, I peered over to see the moat far beneath me.
I started moving down quickly, lowering myself one step after another, until at last I reached the water. I let go of the wall and dropped into the murky moat, which smelled of rotting plants. Holding my breath, I swam to the other side.
There wasn't anyone around. I hoisted myself out quickly, then started to run. I was running for East Dovren and for Finn and for the life I used to have.
Maybe it had never been a glamorous life, or within the boundaries of the law. But at least I hadn't been living among monsters.
40
Lila
I’d crawled from the moat like a primordial monster. My thoughts were a haze as I ran, and the streets started to grow more crowded as I went up toward the market areas, making for Underskirt Lane. When I saw a patrolman in his black uniform and his tall black hat, I'd never felt such a sense of relief. Here I was, safe in the mortal world again.
I rushed over to him. And as soon as I saw his silver cufflink with the lightning strike, I knew I could confide in him. I grabbed his arms, staring into his eyes.
"Easy there, love," he said.
“The count murdered all his servants. He’s been killing women, I think. Carving them open. You have to keep patrolling the streets.”
He leaned in. "I know, love. We're working against them. We're doing everything we can. Their kind are a vermin that has infected our country. Do you understand? And we will have to exterminate them one by one. But you must stay away from them.”
One by one … How many of them were there?
This response was considerably darker than I'd anticipated. It wasn’t quite the reassurance I was hoping for. I nodded, taking a step back from him.
“It’s just the count,” I added. “He’s the murderer, killing servants. I saw a photo. It was my sister. Alice.” I felt flustered, like this was all coming out wrong. “You just need to patrol the streets around here, and make sure women aren’t out walking alone.”
He narrowed his eyes at me, then looked me up and down. “You’re naive if you think he’s the only problem we’ve got. They’re everywhere.”
What was he talking about?
I backed away, then started running to find Finn. When I got to the market, I found it bustling, as if life were just carrying on as normal, as if we couldn't lose our heads at any moment. As if I weren’t in hell.
I found Finn just where I expected him: at his market stall, surrounded by knickers. All perfectly normal, except his expression was grim, skin pale as cream. And he had a new addition to his clothing, a little silver badge with a lightning bolt.
"Finn," I gasped.
He turned to look at me, sorrow shining in his blue eyes. "I'm sorry I had to send you that picture, Lila, but I thought you needed to see it. Because of what you'll be asked to do."
I swallowed hard. “What will I be asked to do?”
He looked around the market. "We should go somewhere else."
I nodded.
He called out to an old woman nearby, asking her to watch the stall in exchange for lunch. Then, he was leading me through the crowded streets.
As we walked, he turned to me and said, "I'm taking you to a pub where we don't need to worry. It's all Free Men there. They're all like us."