I found the castle empty—because everyone had been patrolling the courtyard, now poisoned with nightshade. I shouted his name, but I felt it was being swallowed by the castle.
By the time I reached his room, I was completely out of breath, gasping.
I flung the door open and started to run through the library.
“Samael!” I shouted. Sourial was there, too.
Samael stood before the little table where I’d planted the bomb, pulling open the drawer. I stared in horror.
I had only a moment of looking into his eyes, those beautiful gray eyes—just long enough to see surprise, relief even.
“Don’t!” I screamed.
But the word was drowned out by the searing heat that scorched my body, and the force of the blast that threw me back against the stone walls.
For a blinding moment, pain ripped my body apart, and then darkness pulled me under.
I woke to the feel of silk beneath me.
Confusion whirled in my mind. Something terrible had happened, but I couldn’t remember what it was. I blinked into the slanting light.
To my right, rays of honeyed light pierced two gothic, diamond-paned windows. They cast a golden wash over wooden stacks of books, from the floor to the ceiling. Vaguely, I remembered a much larger library, one three stories tall. I was in a smaller room, cozy. I liked it in here.
But a dark shadow was sliding over my thoughts. Something terrible had happened in the large library. A castle library. I felt like my mind had trapped a terrible memory beneath a murky surface, but when I shed light on it, it hurt. Pain pressed sharply against my skull. A pressure in my head. I licked my lips, finding them dry.
I had no bloody idea where I was, or how I’d got here. When I moved my head, pain shot through my temples. Ow. When I pushed myself up on my elbows, pain cracked my bones. Ow. When I moved my skin in the sheets, I felt like I was burning.
A dark memory pushed at the recesses of my mind. My body had been burning, charred flesh …
Nausea rose in my stomach. Had I been on fire?
I ripped off the sheets, staring down at myself. I was wearing a short, white nightgown—not mine. But I didn't see any burn marks. A light reddish hue, maybe, and a strange, faint shimmer. But nothing that looked serious.
I blinked and surveyed the room. Besides the windows, there were two oak doors, one bolted shut, the other leading to what looked like a bathroom. On a bedside table, someone had set out a glass of water. My throat felt like sandpaper, and I took a long sip.
My body felt weak, shaky. After I slaked my thirst, I slowly slid my legs over the side of the bed, my bare feet touching a cold stone floor.
Who had dressed me in the nightgown if it wasn’t mine?
My legs buckled at first when I tried to stand, but then I steadied myself.
When I crossed to the window, I stared out at an iron-gray river, entranced. I didn’t think I’d been here before. Was this the east? The west?
I had no idea where I was, only that I was on a cliff high above the rushing river, and the sunlight was breaking through periwinkle gray clouds. I pressed my palms against the glass, my breath fogging it as I stared out. With a high whistle, a draft rushed through a tiny gap in the side of the window.
The coldness of the glass against my hands sharpened my senses, until memories started to break free from where I’d trapped them.
I’d been in a different castle before this, and something terrible had happened there. The pressure in my skull was growing sharper, more painful, and I had to let something out.
“Samael.” As I said the name out loud, the full force of the memory came slamming back into me again.
My heart began to slam against my ribs.
Oh, God.
I’d planted a fucking bomb. Finn had betrayed me—utterly and completely. My sister, too.
And I’d left a bomb in the tea drawer, and Samael and Sourial had been there. Had I killed them?
Guilt was cracking my ribs open. I’d gone there to kill Samael, because I thought he’d slaughtered Alice. Only it turned out, I’d been tricked.
I didn't get to them in time, did I?
I pushed through the crushing grief to rush to the bolted door, trying to open it.
I started to bang on the door, screaming for Samael.
Why was I here? If I had actually killed these two powerful fallen angels, why had the soldiers let me live? I shouldn’t be in a comfortable bed, with a glass of water and a view of the river.
I wanted to break free and hunt down Finn. I didn’t know what I’d do when I caught him, but I just wanted him to hurt like I did.
And then I needed a word with Alice. She’d betrayed me, too.
Problem was, I seemed to be locked in this room.
I slammed my fist against the door. “Hello? Anyone!”
At last, the door opened and I found myself staring up at a pair of storm-gray eyes.
My chest squeezed. Samael looked like perfection, not a scratch on him. On the downside, he was looking at me with an expression that suggested he was considering murdering me.
"You're okay," I stammered. “You're not dead.”
“Not for lack of trying on your part.” His deep voice sent a shiver of fear up my spine.
“What about Sourial?” I asked, catching my breath.
“I’m sorry to inform you that you also failed to kill him.” Flames blazed in his eyes. “Sourial nearly died, but he has been recovering. I was directly in the blast, and I would not have recovered, if it weren’t for the fact that your seduction did not go far enough.” He stepped closer, then leaned down next to me, his breath warming my ear. “If you intended to kill me, you really should have done a more thorough job of fucking me. Better luck next time.”
My cheeks burned red. “I was given bad information.”
He looked into my eyes, his piercing gaze taking me apart. “Is that right?”
“I tried to stop you. I ran in there to stop you from opening the drawer.”
He arched an eyebrow. “You tried to stop me from setting off the bomb that you planted to kill me? How very noble of you. Be sure to remind me that I owe you my undying gratitude.”
He shut the door behind him, and fear skittered over my skin. It was just me and an angel of death, alone in a castle room. And I’d recently tried to blow him up.
I took a step back. “You need to give me a chance to explain.”
He cupped the side of my face, gently—but his eyes were searing me. A sheen of gold swept over his cheekbone, like he was about to lose control again. “The Free Men convinced you to try to murder me.”
“That’s not inaccurate.”
The pressure was building up higher in my head, ready to explode—until I understood what I needed to do. I needed to just tell him everything. Everything.
“My name isn’t Zahra. It’s Lila. I was never a courtesan. I'm a thief. Rumor used to be that my sister worked in Castle Hades. All anyone knew was she went missing. I suspected your soldiers killed her. Or you personally. I thought you were killing those women in the street. Finn told me you signed your name to the murders. And I trusted Finn.”
He cocked his head, but the rest of his body was unnervingly still, his hand still on my cheek. “Interesting. Who the fuck is Finn?”
“An absolute prick, as it turns out. Used to be my best friend, but now he’s one of the Free Men. He said you were killing women, ripping out their lungs. He said you signed your name. And then I found Alice’s locket in the Tower of Bones. I knew she worked there. I had my doubts, still. Maybe you weren’t what you seemed. But then Finn showed me a photograph. It was proof.”