“Carter’s numbers?” I surmise. He nods and then continues, switching out the page and it’s another from Marcus. “The female belonged to him; you know birds have good memories. It appears they have mated.” He pauses, looking up at me to say, “He took her, Carter took Aria and it put him on Marcus’s list. But he took it back.”
The wealth of information in those letters is dangerous.
“How many have you gone through?” I ask him and then add, “How did you get these?”
“We broke in after closing, picked the lock, and took copies. It took hours and I don’t think Walsh knows, but Marcus does.”
“How do you know he knows?”
“He left a letter on Carter’s car at The Red Room. He was there. He addressed it, Beast.” Declan swallows before telling me, “He said to tell you to bring Walsh to him.” He glances at the house then back to me before closing his eyes. “It’s inside. You can read it… he calls you King,” he says and brings his palms to his eyes. “He said you would be the one to show Walsh to him. That it’s time the two of them met.”
Declan’s expression is devoid of anything but concern. I’m intimately familiar with his expression. It’s the look you give someone when they’ve been sentenced to die.
“Is that all he said?” He nods once. “Walsh wants to meet Marcus. Marcus wants us to bring Walsh to him. I need to read the note, but I am fine doing it.”
“Seth,” Declan warns, “I don’t trust it. We have information on him, we have intel no one else has ever known. I don’t think he’s going to let you walk away. He could have told Walsh to meet him.” He raises his voice when I shake my head. “He could do this on his own!”
“He likes to see if we’ll listen. You know that. He likes to give a demand and have it met.” This is the last piece of the puzzle for me. I bring Walsh to Marcus, I follow through on my word, and then I leave. I let it all go. For Laura and my baby. This is my way out.
“I have to do this,” I say, cutting him off as he rambles on about not trusting Marcus.
“Marcus has been focused on you. I don’t like it. I don’t like a damn—”
“He has, and now he can have me.”
“You could be walking to your death,” he tells me evenly although his voice cracks. He swallows so harshly I know he believes every bit of what he told me.
“I could be ending this,” I answer him in the same tone. “I need all this shit with them to end. When does he want to meet?”
“Tonight.”
Laura
“Where are you going?” I woke up to an empty bed. Just as my hand reached out to test if the sheets were still warm, I heard him in the room over.
I don’t tell him I saw the guns. Seth usually leaves with one on his waistband, but he grabbed two more today. He doesn’t think I pay attention but I do. His bruises and scrapes have all but healed, and I get the feeling he’s on his way to get fresh ones.
“Nowhere important, Babygirl. I’ll be back soon. Within hours.”
“How many times have you told me that?” I question him, crossing my arms and leaning against the threshold where the hall meets the living room.
With his boots tied up, he leans back on the sofa. Blue jeans, boots, and a button-down white shirt that’s rolled up to his elbows. The tats on his right arm show and it gets me all worked up.
“Come here,” he says then spreads his legs and pats them. It’s easy enough to go to him; it’s what I want more than anything. “It’s late.” I murmur the protest against his chest as I breathe him in.
Whatever he smells like, I’ll never grow tired of it.
“I know and I’m sorry, I have to do this tonight but then I’m staying in with you. We can be lazy together at night. Shit, we can be lazy together in the morning too.” A charming smile meets me when I look up at him. “I want to be lazy with you,” he tells me and I have to laugh. My shoulders jostle against his chest and I scoot in closer to him, one hand on my belly.
“I’m sorry it has to be tonight. Of all freaking nights,” he says, sounding as exasperated as I feel. “Don’t be mad at me.” He brushes my hair back behind my ear. “I just have something to wrap up,” he answers so casually, but there’s this gut feeling I can’t shake.
Something inside of me is screaming to tell him not to go tonight. I close my eyes and when I open them, the lick of the flames in the fireplace stares back at me. It’s got to be the fear of loss. That and the guilt that I still haven’t told him about my heart. The surgery isn’t guaranteed. I just want to have the baby first.
The first doctor gave me a year. I can have this baby before then. Is it so wrong to keep this secret? Judging by the swell of emotion in my throat and the dreadful feeling that stirs inside the pit of my stomach, yes. Yes, it is wrong.
“Seth,” I say and I almost ask him not to go tonight. I’m so close to blurting out that I need him to stay because I have to tell him something that’s been killing me.
“Babygirl,” he says and his voice is so calming as he repositions me on the sofa so I’m no longer on his lap. The weight of his body rests on his knee that’s beside me and it makes the cushion tilt, bringing me into his body. “You don’t have to be worried. One more night and after that I’m telling Jase I want to ease out of it all.”
“What?” My eyes widen with shock. “I didn’t ask you to do that.” I know who this man is and what his life is. You can’t leave the life. I’d never ask him to. “You can’t just—”
“You didn’t have to,” he stresses and settles down next to me. “I can’t leave, you’re right… but I can back off. Sebastian is Carter’s right-hand man. They get it and with everything going on, it’s better anyway for me to lay low.”
“What’s going on?” I ask him breathlessly, adrenaline picking up. I don’t like any of this. Nothing feels right.
“Nothing you have to worry about,” he tells me as he leans his forehead against mine. “I promise.”
“You make lots of promises,” I whisper with my eyes closed and my hands on his at my shoulders.
“And I’m keeping every one of them. All you have to do is promise you’ll be here when I get back.”
“I promise,” I answer wholeheartedly. It seems hollow in my chest though. Something’s wrong. I can feel it. As if I may not be here. My heart ticks and then thuds. “Seth,” I say and close my eyes, ready to tell him.
“I mean it, Laura. I want to have stability. I can run the bar; I can be here more. I’ll be a good dad.”
There’s so much hope in his voice and it’s more than soothing, it’s addictive. Just the idea of him holding our baby... I want to hear him say it again and again. My breath stills and I lean forward, capturing his lips with mine and surprising myself as much as him.
He smiles when he whispers, “That’s my girl.”
After telling me to go to bed, he says he loves me again. I love hearing it. For years I pretended he’d say it, and now I have it. I make sure the last thing he hears before he leaves is, “I love you too.”