"Small is nice."
"It is," she agreed. "But I have always secretly been envious of those big, crazy Christmas mornings in movies and TV. Or having a literal crowd at backyard barbecues or stuff like that. A dozen happy birthday texts. All that kind of stuff. I imagine it might feel overwhelming, but in a good way."
"That's a good way to put it," I agreed, my finger toying with the ends of her hair, the silky strands slipping over my skin. "I can't even explain to you how loud it gets," I told her, shaking my head. "With all the kids and the teens and the adults. It is insanity. But in a fun way. And I was somewhat used to it, having so many siblings."
"Your poor sister," Katie mused. "Four brothers to pick on her."
"I'd like to say we didn't, but we absolutely did. But she had a lot of people on her team when she needed us too. No one fucked with Scotti."
"I'll bet. I haven't seen all your brothers, but if they're all as intimidating as you are, I imagine no one wanted to mess with her."
There was a sad twinge to her words, like maybe she was thinking about her own shitty school experience, wondering if having four big, burly brothers might have prevented her from being bullies.
I didn't know if it would help with the girls being assholes, but having brothers absolutely would have kept the guys in line. Even if we had to punch our way through the whole school.
"Okay, I have to go get breakfast started," she said, sucking in a deep breath, then slowly pulling away from me.
Her gaze stayed downcast as she gathered her blankets, and made her way to the door.
"What the fuck was that?" I mumbled to my empty room, scrubbing my hands down my face as my cock continued to throb with its need for release.
On a sigh, I got out of bed, going into the bathroom for a shower, then got into junk around clothes, grabbing some coffee Katie had made before she started making the donuts.
"I'm gonna go take a look around. Call me when the food is done, babe."
With that, I went outside, knowing I needed to keep my distance from her, and the simmering sensation of interest I was feeling toward her.
It just couldn't happen.
The bed-sharing thing, that was an isolated incident. And nearness with the opposite sex could just stir sensations that, under normal circumstances, you wouldn't feel toward someone else. Especially a coworker.
I didn't have a lot of rules regarding sex. But not fucking around at work was one of them.
The air was crisp and damp as I went outside, finding the ground littered with small broken branches, blown around leaves. Nothing crazy. But I set to work on it like someone was paying me to, hoping to burn off the excess energy that could so easily turn to sexual frustration.
I gathered sticks, raked leaves, took a walk around to clear any big limbs that had fallen in the path on the way to the lake.
Only then did I head back, smelling the donuts and something else, a mixture of breakfast scents, as I made my way into the kitchen, finding Katie coming back from the fireplace in the common room with a frying pan in her hand.
"Oh, good timing. Eggs are done. You can't just eat donuts," she told me, passing me a plate with the eggs, a sliced apple, and two donuts. "How were things looking?"
"Not bad. I think we are going to luck out with the road being clear, so we can go make some calls. We got to get the power on. The water is on a well pump. We're going to go dry fast."
"Damnit," I growled a couple hours later when we huddled into my rental only to be stopped by a massive tree that had downed right across the entire street. "If that useless shed has a chainsaw, I might be able to work on this," I told her with a sigh as I turned the car around, heading back to the cabin.
I wasn't worried about being trapped, per se.
I was worried about being trapped with no electricity.
It would have continued to be a pleasant break from the busier world back in Navesink Bank if not for the worry about water. And with the worry about water came the worry about plumbing. I could rough it. I'd been camping. I could bathe in the pond. I could keep us warm by fire. I could move some of the refrigerated stuff out into the shed, the days were cool enough, to keep anything except dairy and meat from spoiling.
But I didn't want to have to explain to Katie that the great outdoors was now our bathroom, or that we had to wash dishes—and ourselves—with lake water.
The shed didn't have a chainsaw. There was an ax if I got particularly desperate.
"Fuck," I hissed, gearing myself up for the uncomfortable conversation, going around the back of the shed to pull the tarp off what I imagined was a pile of firewood. "Oh, thank fuck," I said, breathing a sigh of relief when I saw the generator. It was small. I didn't think we could hook up more than the well pump and the fridge to it, but that was something. Those were my biggest concerns.
We could use the oil lantern for light when we needed. We could charge our useless phones in the car.
And I could keep her warm with a nice, cozy fire. And my body heat. In my bed.
So much for keeping my distance.
I should have been frustrated.
But there was no denying that my dominant feeling was that of excitement.
Shit.
FIVE
Katie
I didn't want him to find a chainsaw.
I didn't want him to move the tree.
I didn't want him to get us in contact with the outside world, get us reconnected to power.
Because a needy, pathetic part of me wanted just one more day of him all to myself, one more night of sharing his warmth.
The night before, I had truly just been too cold to even think straight, had fully intended to sleep on his floor, or have him light me a fire downstairs. I just wanted to get warm.
But once I got into that bed with him? Yeah, I wanted a lot of other things. Things I knew I couldn't have, but I had enjoyed punishing myself with the possibility of them as I lay there, his solid, warm body beside me, his woodsy scent covering the sheets and pillows, his deep, sexy voice talking to me like sharing a bed was something normal for us, almost as though we were old lovers.
Then, when I woke up in his arms, after the initial panic about being seen as clingy evaporated, God, it had been so nice.
I wasn't sure I'd ever woken up in the arms of a man before. My ex was not a touchy-feely person, and definitely not a snuggler, once telling me he thought I was being smothering when I had tried to rest on his chest after sex.
I, unexpectedly, felt really at peace, safe, protected.
I let myself lay there for a while, get lost in the fantasy of it all, especially when he didn't immediately roll out from under me when he woke up to find me all over him.
But then, I reminded myself, that he was probably just being nice, trying not to embarrass me about my unconscious decision to climb him like a cat.
That, and the humiliation that swarmed my body about it, had me pulling away, getting as much distance as possible.
I made breakfast while reminding myself that we were playing house. It wasn't real life. As soon as the others showed up and we all went home, Rush Rivers would practically forget he had ever met me. And surely that he had ever shared a bed with me.