I was too taken by how beautiful the dress was on me to notice yesterday, but the realization came rushing in now. When I wore it, the tags weren’t there.
What the hell did that mean?
A loud gasp escaped me. Could it be…?
“Lina, you okay? What are you doing in there?”
My heart thrashed, and my body trembled as I grabbed a towel. I covered myself, and my feet faltered their way to the door. When I opened it, her brows were shot high up, her quizzical expression scrutinizing me.
“Nicky…I’m gonna ask you something really stupid, but I want you to answer me anyway.”
She snorted. “Okay.”
“Who bought my dress?” I held my breath.
Another snort. “You did, silly. You finally succumbed to temptation and did it.” Her giggle radiated through her face.
My head spun like I was about to pass out.
“Lina? What’s going on? Did you just start your period? You don’t look so hot. Is that what it was all about yesterday?” My panic suddenly reached her but for all the wrong reasons. “Oh my God. Is the dress ruined? Please don’t tell me it’s ruined.” She sounded like she was about to cry.
“No. Don’t worry. It’s as good as new. But… Yeah, I just…um… I’ma make myself some anise tea and rest a little bit for the cramps to pass.” I tried to swallow, but my mouth felt like a rock. “Why don’t you go ahead and return your dress, and I’ll do mine later today?” I couldn’t bear another second of this. If she asked one more question or gave me one more examining look, I was gonna collapse.
“Okay. Yeah sure. I’ll go make you that anise tea then I’ll go.”
I allowed myself to breathe. “Thanks, Sis.”
When she left the room, I was out of breath again. Rapidly, I tore through my closet and checked the goddamn dress for the tags, for a note, for any fucking thing left with it.
Nothing.
My heart sank to my knees. Nicky didn’t buy me this dress. Someone else did. Someone who had been following me to know I wanted to buy this dress. Who knew where I lived. Who could get in and out our condo without being noticed, whenever he pleased.
Him.
Nicky’s footsteps boomed closer. I hid the dress in the closet and sat on the bed, trying so hard to stop shaking.
She set the cup on the nightstand, and then she kissed me. “You’re gonna catch a cold like this. Get dressed, sweetie.”
I faked a smile and nodded once.
“Are you sure it’s just your period?” she asked, concern dripping from her voice. “You’ve been acting really strange. Did something happen? You never told me where you went on your own last night when I left you.”
I thought about telling Nicky the truth. I hated lying to her, and after knowing that he could break into our condo that easily, I was more scared than ever. But if I told her, she’d freak out. She’d do anything to keep me safe, including leaving everything behind and go somewhere else where she might think he couldn’t find us.
My sister was finally happy. New home. New school. I couldn’t ruin things for her now.
“I went out for some air and got lost. It was just for a few minutes.” That felt like a lifetime. “Then I found the signs and followed them back to the auditorium.”
Disappointment crossed her face as she nodded. I could tell she didn’t believe me. “Okay. Just know that you can tell me anything. I’m always here for you.”
“I know. I’m here for you, too.”
She smiled and kissed me again. Then she left, and I crumbled on the floor, sobbing, panicking. “I’m such an idiot. How could I think of him in any other way than he was? A freakin’ psycho stalker.”
A horrible thought flickered in my head. What if he was watching me right now?
I bolted upright, my eyes darting around, right and left, up and down, searching for cameras. “Can you see me? Are you watching me in my own bedroom?” Fear turned into rage as I rose to my feet. “You’re a coward. Do you hear me? You’re a fucking coward.” I held my towel tight to my body, afraid it might fall, afraid he’d see me naked. Afraid he might already have. “Show yourself, you piece of shit!”
My head and I spun in endless circles, silence and fury my only company. “Is that what I am to you? A game you watch? A toy you dress up and undress for your amusement? A property you plan to buy? You think you can buy me with a dress?” I stormed inside the closet and yanked the stupid thing out. I tossed it on the floor and stomped on it. “Here it is. Your precious gift.” It wasn’t just the dress, though. It was all the other birthday presents, too. I touched my ear, pulling the earrings, almost tearing my earlobes, and threw the expensive, disgusting jewelry at the window.
The violin peeked from my chair, and I grabbed it. In a full swing, my arms rose behind me to smash it, but I froze, my heart shattering. This instrument was more than an object. It was my only solace. My best friend. I couldn’t just kill it.
Instead, I crumbled again on the chair, tears burning my face. “Why? How could you do this to me? How could you hurt me like that? I thought you were my savior, my protector. How could you violate me like that?”
It wasn’t like he hadn’t broken into my bedroom before. I had no doubt now he had broken into our old house, and he was the one leaving me the presents in my Bellomo dorm. As crazy and wrong as it may sound, I didn’t mind that he did. I even liked it. Loved every moment of his attention. Adored that he cared. I believed that was his way of telling me he still remembered me. Letting me know that I mattered to him, and he was still out there watching over me.
The little girl he had to save.
But breaking into this condo for God knew how many times, leaving me a sexy dress that made me look like a woman, not a little girl…
Yesterday showed me how much of an idiot I’d been. All this time I was nothing but a body he thought he could buy when it was ripe enough.
Tears flowed in abundance now. The pain tightening my chest was almost as bad as the ache my father carved inside me. Nicky was right. Her words echoed in my head. Nobody does stuff like that for people like us without expecting something in return either. It’s been four years. Don’t you think he’d have showed up by now, asking for whatever the hell he wanted in return from us? From you?
He did. He showed up yesterday to claim what he thought he owned.
I did owe him. A lot. He saved me from the sicko monster that was supposed to protect me. From guys like him. How fucking twisted was that?
And now, even though he didn’t say it or make any clear demands, I knew exactly how he wanted me to pay for his favor. He didn’t need words. The heat in his breath, in his voice, in his almost touch that even now was wreaking havoc on my body was enough.
He killed my father to save me. He—not a miracle—put me and my sister in a good home and school. He bought me expensive clothes and jewelry. Even my violin. All this to have one thing.
Me.
No. My body.
“Why did you stop? Why didn’t you make me pay? Why didn’t you collect your debt?” I asked the emptiness, the silence driving me crazy. “I need answers goddammit.”
Ci vediamo, my sweet Angel.
His dark promise rang in my head, taunting me. Then it suddenly hit me. He was toying with me, messing with my head. Yesterday wasn’t about a claim. It was another battle in his psychological war that he, again, won.