Making love.
That’s what it was called, but we weren’t in love, although I could easily imagine myself falling there all too quickly. Already, I unexpectedly felt attached to both of them. The idea I might have brought danger their way did not sit well with me. I’d come for protection but hadn’t thought about the safety of those who would be protecting me, not until now.
If either of them was hurt because of me…
I wanted to think Lord Carmichael wouldn’t keep following me, but I already knew he’d been looking for me in New York. I hadn’t just pricked his pride and stolen from him, I’d injured him. The smell of burning flesh seemed to flood my nose again, and I shuddered, remembering as clear as day the way he’d looked on the floor, moaning while holding his hand to the burn.
“You alright there, sweetheart?” William’s low whisper jerked me out of my reverie, the vision and the smell fading as quickly as they’d come. I nodded, turning my head, and meeting his blue eyes, soft and full of concern.
I couldn’t have that. Men needed to be happy. To be pleased. My brain was still foggy from sleep, but I remembered that. Reaching out, my fingers quickly found his shaft and wrapped around it. William groaned when I stroked the hard flesh, rubbing my thumb over the sensitive tip.
“I’m fine,” I whispered. “I’m just fine.”
“Hell, sweetheart, that feels damn good,” William whispered, his hand draping over mine.
Good, I was making him feel good. That was what a wife was supposed to do, wasn’t it? And I was very good at making men feel good. I propped myself up on my elbow, so I could bend over him, my lips heading for his cock—
Fingers gripped my hair, pulling me back up. I gasped in surprise and the slight pain. William’s eyes met mine, a frown forming on his face. He was holding me immobile, thinking hard and staring at me. What had I done wrong? Clive stirred beside us, opening his eyes, but William didn’t even glance at him.
“What are you doing, Sassy?” he asked, holding my hair tightly gripped, so I couldn’t look away from him.
I wet my lips, my tongue darting out, but he didn’t look away from my eyes.
“I-I was just…”
“What was she doing?” Clive asked. Sleep still fogged his voice, but he sat up, clearly coming awake very quickly.
“She was going to use her mouth on me,” William said, glancing at Clive.
Now, both of my new husbands were looking at me oddly, chasing the fog from my mind. Panic surged as I realized my sleepy mistake. Whores used their mouths on men. A proper young lady probably shouldn’t have even known it was a possibility.
“Where did you learn about that?” Clive asked suspiciously, confirming my thoughts.
“I-I… the girls at the factory,” I finally blurted out, hoping with all my heart, they believed the lie. I tripped over my words, trying to find some that wouldn’t make them more suspicious. “They said, they said men liked to have their… to be kissed there. Some of them said. Should I… should I not have…” I was stumbling over my words in my panic, very much wishing I had not done that, but both William and Clive relaxed at my stammered explanation.
“Well, they weren’t wrong,” William said, shaking his head almost ruefully, his grip lessening. “Sorry, sweetheart, I shouldn’t have reacted that way. I didn’t expect you to know about such things, and it took me off guard.”
My heart was pounding in my chest, and I bit my lower lip, dropping my head, so they wouldn’t see the tears that sprang to my eyes. If I had wanted proof, I couldn’t reveal my past to them, I had it. They would surely think differently of me if they knew. Likely treat me differently, too.
Last night, they’d acted as though I was a treasured possession. I did not want to lose that. I did not want to lose them. They clearly thought I was a modest young lady. Would they want to remain married if they knew?
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, unsure of what else to say.
“It’s fine, sweetheart,” William said, stroking my hair. “You just startled me. I’m sorry I overreacted.”
Except he hadn’t. He’d been right to be shocked. Deep down, I knew that.
This might be harder than I thought.
“We’ll teach you how to use your mouth later,” Clive said. Unlike William, he wasn’t smiling, which made me nervous. A serious expression seemed to be his default, so it might not have meant anything… but I couldn’t be sure. “We should get back to the ranch now.”
Clive
* * *
Our wife was somewhat subdued as we packed up our things to head back to the ranch. I kept a close eye on her.
Something about her claim, she’d heard the other factory girls talking about oral pleasure didn’t sit right with me. Women gossiped, to be sure, but Sassy was so nervous, even after she’d explained herself. William had believed her story, but I kept watching her, suspicion niggling in the back of my mind.
I didn’t know what I was suspicious about, exactly. I just knew that something wasn’t quite right. Neither William nor I cared if she had gossiped with other women about sex, but that didn’t fit her prim and proper appearance – and I did care if she lied. I didn’t like lies. Some of my doubts from the previous day were seeping back in. After all, what did we really know about her? Only what she told us. And while her story had fit, why did she keep shooting us looks this morning as if she expected us to lash out at her?
While I wanted to trust her, something was amiss. I didn’t say anything, though. William was taking everything she said to heart, not a mistrusting bone in his body. He thought I was too cynical, and sometimes, I thought he was right, but something told me our new wife was keeping secrets, even if I couldn’t imagine what they would be. Of course, William would likely say it was me making her nervous.
If she was lying, I knew of one sure way to make sure she didn’t do so again, but I wasn’t going to spank her without knowing for sure, no matter how my hand tingled, like a physical portent of things to come.
Getting her seated on the wagon bench between us, I picked up the reins and flicked them to get the horses moving. I let her look her fill of the town, but once we were on the road, I started in with the questions I probably should have asked before we got her in front of the altar.
“So, Sassy. Tell us about this man you’re running from.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her shoulders tense. I couldn’t see her expression because she’d insisted on putting on that ridiculous bonnet again before we’d even left the hotel. It made her feel safer, but it also completely hid her face. Still, if I’d been watching her face, I would have never noticed her shoulders.
William glared at me over her head, but not from my line of questioning. He wanted to know too, just thought I was too blunt.
“Yes, sweetheart, tell us about him,” he said more gently, picking up one of her hands to console her. For the first time ever, I was jealous he wasn’t holding the reins. Even if I was intent on questioning our new wife, that didn’t stop me from wanting to touch her.
“Is he from New York?”
“No, England,” she said, her voice soft and throaty. The bonnet twitched as though she’d shaken her head. “He’s a lord there. Lord Carmichael. But I know he was looking for me in New York.”