She reached for a glass of her own. “Did you? I get the path you chose. I get you. All I’m suggesting is that it might be time to reevaluate that life plan.”
“I can’t. My mother isn’t able to work as much as she once could. Some of their bills have become my bills.” I raised my hand in a plea. “Before you say anything—I want to help them. My parents are everything to me.”
Cecile filled a flute of champagne for herself. “I don’t doubt that. You’re a good person, Wren, but you can’t put aside your life for theirs. What are you afraid of? What do you think would happen if you did something for yourself?”
Her question tapped at a fear I usually denied. My father was a good man, but I’d grown up in the shadow of his demons. I knew exactly what I feared would happen if he lost his battle with them. Just thinking about it had me downing the rest of my glass in one gulp. “Nothing I could live with. My mom can’t handle my father on her own,” I said with a shrug of resignation. “They need me.” It was that simple and that complicated. No, it wasn’t fair that I wasn’t as free as many people my age were—but life wasn’t fair. If it were, my father would have come home from his time in the army holding his head high like the hero he was, and not as a broken man none of us had ever found a way to heal. I let Cecile refill my glass. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be such a downer.”
Compassion and love met my gaze. “Hey, don’t be sorry. I love you. I just wish I knew what to say. I don’t know what it’s like to have someone rely on me the way your parents rely on you. If there’s anything I can do . . .”
I gave her hand a squeeze. “You already have. You invited me to Paris. You don’t know how much I needed this vacation—to step out of my life for just a little while. This is the perfect way to recharge my batteries. I’m not unhappy, Cecile. Everyone has responsibilities. I don’t resent mine; I just always thought I’d be more than I am . . .”
Her hand tightened on mine. “Stop right there. Don’t you dare say a bad word about my best friend. You are—”
“Enough about me,” I said, needing to end the conversation that was making me think about things I’d wanted to forget for a week. I forced a smile and dropped her hand. “How long have you had this place?”
“Did I say I own it?” Her head cocked to the side.
“Are you renting?” I took another look around. Glass and chrome with mahogany accents. Expensive, but with a masculine feel to it that upon consideration didn’t match Cecile’s style. Not nearly enough mirrors.
“No. Do you remember I told you about Felix?”
“Once-a-month Felix? You’re still seeing him? I thought you said that was over.”
She took a long sip of champagne, then raised both arms to place them on the edge of the hot tub, bringing her breasts fully above the bubbles. I must have been buzzed by then, because it no longer felt awkward. “I did end it, but other men drive me crazy. They’re so needy. Felix is just easy. It’s like visiting a fuck spa.”
“A fuck spa,” I repeated with a laugh. Yeah, I was buzzed.
“You have no idea how good sex is when there is no pressure to make it into something meaningful. I don’t ask Felix who he’s with when I’m not here. He doesn’t ask me. If I skip a month, I don’t have to explain why. It’s just sex. Really good sex.”
With round eyes, I looked away again. “Sounds . . .”
“Therapeutic,” she finished for me. “I swear, there’s no better way to relax. You should try it.”
A flush warmed my cheeks again. “That’s not my thing either.”
She laughed. “Sex?”
“Sex outside of a relationship.”
“Oh. And how long has it been since you’ve been in a relationship?”
I cringed. Part of what I’ve always loved about Cecile was that she didn’t filter her opinions. Her description of sex with Felix could easily have fit our friendship. No pressure. No stress. We called each other when the mood struck us and didn’t sweat the times we didn’t call. There were two sides of Cecile, the savvy businesswoman and the free spirit she chose to be in her downtime.
We were very different, but somehow it worked. The key was appreciating those differences and occasionally giving each other shit for them—but all in fun. With Cecile I’d never had to be anyone but myself, and when you find a friend like that . . . you keep them for life. “Two years,” I admitted.
“Oh Lord, you need to get laid. Don’t be offended, but I’m going to throw an offer out there. Felix will be back soon. If you want to stay, you’re welcome to.”
My eyes snapped to hers, and I swallowed hard. “Stay?”
“For dinner.”
Relief flooded through me, and I chuckled. “I’m sorry. For a second I thought—”
“That I was suggesting a ménage à trois?”
“Yes.”
“I was. Felix and I like to spice things up every once in a while. No pressure. But think about it.”
As a knee-jerk reaction, I stood up and stuttered, “I—I—I love you for asking. It’s a huge compliment. Huge. When you asked me if I wanted to come see you in Paris, I didn’t think you meant see you.” I waved my hand at her bare chest. I did love her, and we were close, but I didn’t want more than that.
Nor did I want to offend her.
“Wren?”
“Yes?” I put a leg over the edge of the hot tub. Buzzed or not, it was time to get out.
“You realize you could simply say no.”
I really should have used the steps to get out. The drop was higher on that side than I’d thought. I was dangling over the side of the hot tub. Cecile’s tone was so calm, so nonjudgmental, I felt ridiculous for bolting. Still, I needed to be clear. “No.”
In true Cecile style, her smile remained effortless and genuine. “That’s settled then. Now, would you like some help? I’d hate for you to break a leg on your first day in Paris.” She stood and held out her hand.
I took it. There was a twinkle in her eye that made me wonder if she’d suggested a threesome just to shock me out of the funk I’d fallen into.
She hauled me back over the rim of the hot tub. I hit the water with a splash that had us both laughing.
“I did knock,” a deep male voice announced, and I froze.
Even though I still had my bathing suit on, I ducked into the water. When I turned toward the entrance to the balcony, my breath caught in my throat. I was still a no go on a threesome, but if I ever did have one, it would be because of someone like him.
A little green monster nipped at my heels. I wasn’t envious by nature. Some people had more than I did. Some people had less. But Cecile had him.
I totally understand her fuck spa now.
I’d lost my voice, but not my sight. I started at the tip of his leather dress shoes, let my gaze wander up his legs. He filled out his trousers in a way few men do . . . and the rest of him was deliciously muscular and . . . oh my God, was he getting a hard-on?
I forced my eyes higher and reminded myself that he was Cecile’s. Sure, they have an open relationship and she pretty much already asked me to have sex with him, but . . . I gulped . . . girl code, right? I shouldn’t be this attracted to someone who essentially belongs to one of my friends.