I listened to the engine start. Then I heard the cars turn around and drive away. Even over the sounds of the vehicles, I could hear her muffled screams. She probably begged Damien to turn around and come back for me.
I tried not to think about it anymore. Now I needed to stay strong and accept the outcome of my decision.
When they were long gone and we were alone, I took solace in the fact that Sofia was safe, that she wouldn’t have to watch what was about to happen. She had another chance at life, a chance to start over.
Now, all I had to do was die.
Maddox motioned to one of his men. A second later, a wooden bat was placed in his hand.
So, he was going to beat me to death.
I would only think about Sofia until my body gave out.
Maddox tested the bat in his grip. “Anything you wanna say before we get started?”
I kept my mouth shut.
“I’m not going to kill you. I’m going to make you wish I would kill you.”
6
Sofia
“You need to calm down.” Damien gripped me by both shoulders and forced me into the armchair in my bedroom. “It’s done. No going back.”
I slapped his hands away. “Don’t tell me to calm down.” Tears poured down my face and soaked my cheeks. “How could you let him do this? I’d rather live with Maddox for the rest of my life than let Hades sacrifice himself for me.”
“Well, he wouldn’t.” He kneeled in front of me, his head slightly bent. His hair was messy, as if he’d fingered it all night long. His eyes were full of moisture, as if he were holding back tears. “I know this is hard. It’s hard for me too, but this is what he wanted.”
Watching Damien break down only made me feel worse. We’d both lost someone we loved. My chest heaved as I sobbed my heart out. “I’d rather be raped by Maddox a million times than let Hades die for me.”
Damien pulled out a full syringe from his pocket. “I think you should take this.”
I was in so much agony that I was tempted. I wanted to forget what had just happened; I wanted to forget watching Hades stand there as we drove away. Instead of being happy that I was home, I couldn’t appreciate it at all.
Because Hades wasn’t home.
“How could you let him do this?” I wiped my tears away with my fingertips. “How could you let him die for me?”
Damien bowed his head for a moment. “It was his decision. He couldn’t live with himself, knowing what was happening to you. I tried to take his place, but he wouldn’t let me.”
“So, we do nothing?” I asked. “We just let him…”
“It’s what he wanted.”
“But what kind of life could I have without him?” Fresh tears fell down my cheeks.
“You can live a happy life, because that’s what he wanted.”
I eyed the syringe, but I decided not to take it. Hades had had to suffer constantly while I was away. He didn’t take drugs to erase his pain. Neither would I. “Did Maddox say he would kill him?”
“Didn’t specify.”
“Then why did you drive away? Why did you leave him alone?”
“Because that was what he wanted.”
“Do you think there’s a chance he could be alive?” I knew how unlikely that was, but I couldn’t stop myself from hoping, from believing. I wanted to believe there was a chance we would make it back to each other.
His response was a whisper. “I don’t know.”
“Could you drive back in the morning…just to check?”
Damien wouldn’t dare deny me. “Of course.”
When there was nothing left to say, we sat there in silence, both thinking about the man who meant so much to us. He was probably being tortured as we spoke, and that made me sick to my stomach.
“Ash is here.”
“He is?” I asked.
Damien nodded. “Do you want to see him?”
Under normal circumstances, of course, but right now, I didn’t want to see anybody. I was traumatized by what had happened, heartbroken by what I’d lost. It would be impossible to carry on a coherent conversation. “No.”
“Alright.” He rose to his feet and dug his hand into his pocket. When he pulled his palm out, he opened his fingers and revealed the black wedding ring Hades had worn every day since we got married. “He wanted me to give this to you…”
I gripped it in my shaky fingers and started to sob harder.
Hades knew he wasn’t coming back.
I closed my fingers around it and squeezed. “Give me the syringe.”
7
Hades
I knew it was morning because sunlight filtered through my eyelids.
I lay on the grass, my back against the dirt. My clothes were soaked with blood, and I could barely think because my mind was so fuzzy. So many things were broken, so much blood had been lost. I writhed in unspeakable pain, subjected to such agony that I knew Maddox was right.
I did wish I were dead.
I couldn’t stand and walk; I couldn’t even reach for my phone in my pocket. I was paralyzed on the ground. Even if I could grab my phone, I wasn’t sure I could figure out how to call someone. My body was broken, and I couldn’t move.
I would die here.
I had a few hours left, maybe more.
To distract myself from the pain, I thought of Sofia.
She was safe. She was home. She was free.
I could die happy.
The sound of approaching tires was recognizable to my ears. I was so delirious, I was probably hallucinating the whole thing. Maybe it was a fantasy, that someone was coming to rescue me. The likelihood someone had driven out into the middle of nowhere was nonexistent.
I stayed still on the ground with my eyes closed. I couldn’t move anyway.
A car door shut, and boots thudded against the ground. It was a cold morning in the fall. My lungs ached with every breath I took.
“Fuck.” The footsteps sounded hurried as someone ran over to me. “Hades?” One hand immediately went to my neck to check my pulse, while the other rested against my chest to check my breathing.
I forced my eyes to open, even though it was painful to do so. From between the slit in my eyelids, I could make out Damien’s face.
“Holy shit.” Damien looked over my body, examining my countless injuries. “I can’t believe you’re alive.”
“I won’t be much longer.”
“Can you stand?”
I groaned in response.
“I’m going to get you to a hospital, okay? Just hold on.” He pulled out his phone and made some calls. “Stay with me, okay?”
I was already slipping away.
Damien gave me a shake. “I need you to stay awake.”
“I can’t…”
“Don’t do it for you. Do it for Sofia.”
8
Sofia
I didn’t get out of bed.
The sheets smelled just like him. If I kept my eyes closed, it was like he was still there. I stuck to his side of the bed and pretended he was there with me. His wedding ring sat on the nightstand, and I stared at it as the hours trickled by.