But now…
Now she was harder to tame.
He wanted to go back to the way it was. He wanted her to be afraid. He wanted her to obey and plead for her life and be relieved when he let her live another day. That Vixen was easier to gratify. That Vixen had accepted her fate. He’d known what he was doing then.
Now he knew fuck-all.
“It’s been two years is all,” Hobbs added, solemnly. “I didn’t want to say anything in front of the others last night, but we both know the attack yesterday deliberately failed. This is…familiar, isn’t it?”
Nixon tapped his fingers on the bar, contemplating. “It is.”
“We know who was responsible before.”
“It’s not him,” he said firmly. “I killed him.”
“His body was never recovered.”
“I killed him.”
“You sure about that?”
Nixon laughed coldly. “Last I heard, you can’t live without a heart.”
Hobbs stilled. He was the squeamish type. His face paled as he stared dumbly at Nixon. “Okay then.”
“Vixen will be okay,” Nixon explained, staring down at his untouched glass, deciding it was best to remain clear headed. “I know what I’m doing. I just don’t know who to trust.”
“Don’t insult me.”
“Not trying to.”
“I brought you into this game. I showed you everything. You were just a punk before, remember? A nobody.”
Nixon smirked at Hobbs. “Fucking hell, I hit a nerve.”
Hobbs put his glasses back on, glaring at him. “I don’t like feeling on the outs with my best man. I’ve done nothing to you to warrant any mistrust, and I get you’re having a vent, but don’t ever imply I can’t be trusted. You can talk about having no one to turn to, but you can say it by not lumping me with the likes of them?” He pointed in the general direction of the people in the room.
“You’re being dramatic. I meant it like that, Hobbs. Fucking relax.”
But Hobbs wasn’t finished. “I’m not just your business partner.”
Nixon looked at him, amused. “No, you’re not.”
“Are you tickling my ear?”
“No.”
“We are like brothers, are we not?”
Jesus. “Sure, Hobbs.”
“Sure or yes?”
Dear fucking God. “Yeah, Hobbs, we’re like brothers.”
Hobbs had some serious family issues, man. His shoulders relaxed minimally. “So, what are your plans with the girl then?”
Nixon let out a sigh. He was so tired. His hand was swollen and hurting, and he couldn’t stop thinking about the way Vixen held him last night.
She was so fucking feisty.
He loved her bickering mouth; he’d fuck it right this second if he could.
Okay, so he didn’t want her to fear him. Not at all. He loved her little insults. Her cute little defiance excited him. But it was escalating rapidly. She was turning a little more vicious than he thought was healthy for her.
He could handle her adorable abuse.
But he was sure she couldn’t.
“Nixon,” Hobbs pressed, impatiently.
“I’m building a house,” Nixon responded quickly before he could stop himself. He felt the way Hobbs was staring at him. He didn’t have to turn to see his confusion.
“A house?” he repeated, like he needed to taste that word.
“Yeah, a house. A dwelling. A place of residence.”
“For you?”
Nixon looked at him this time, raising a brow. “Yeah, I feel like playing house on my own.”
Hobbs rolled his eyes. “Okay, and does Vixen have a say in this?”
“She can fill it with her shit, even pick out the colours. I don’t give a fuck.”
“What’s wrong with the hotel?”
Nothing was wrong with the hotel per say. In fact, the security here had never let him down. He always knew where Vixen was. Up until the incident last night, he’d never had to worry about her safety.
The idea with the house had problems. He couldn’t control the ins and outs like he did here, but at the same time, he felt this maddening need to possess Vixen in a different manner. Here, she brushed against too many people. The solitary feeling was never all that present. It never felt personal enough. Even the apartment had that hotel air about it. Everything was clinical and detached. She had no way to express herself.
And he wanted a place where he could have her touch everywhere. A place he could walk into and see her small touches on all surfaces. A hairbrush on the counter, a painting she’d picked out, even the colour of the fucking carpets.
He wanted to feel her in the air before he saw her.
His hunger for her was never satiated. He needed more, and then some more.
More, more, more.
His appetite for the girl was gluttonous.
As the silence stretched, Hobbs grew more unsettled. “Nixon,” he said, concernedly, “first, it was that fucking cabin, and then when that wasn’t good enough, you said the hotel would be better. And now you’re talking about a house. This is escalation behaviour. No, no, actually, this…this is…obsessive.”
“I don’t have her enough here,” Nixon replied, shrugging like it was no big deal. “The house ensures –”
“Ensures she’s locked away in an even tinier box,” Hobbs cut in savagely. “This needs to stop. It needs to end. You can’t keep her like she’s a fucking thing anymore.”
Nixon shook his head. Hobbs didn’t get it. No one got it. They didn’t understand. “She’s not a thing. She’s…everything.”
Hobbs froze, eyeing Nixon peculiarly. “How do you think this is going to play out? In the long term, do you think she will suddenly wake up and want to stay with you?”
“She already does.”
“Nixon, she is miserable.”
“No, she pretends to be. That’s the game, Hobbs.”
If Hobbs didn’t stop looking at him like he was crazy, he was going to punch the fucker out. Nixon knew how fucked up it sounded. Yeah, this was like material for the mentally insane, and maybe he was crazy – he could accept being crazy, because then it meant Vixen was crazy too.
They were the same.
The complimented each other.
They belonged together.
She was the tit to his tat.
The ying to his yang.
Oh, fuck, whatever cheesy bullshit it was the regular folk droned about, that was them.
And she knew it too. On some base level, she needed him. He had become her world, just like he intended. Just like he had hoped.
“I’m worried for you,” Hobbs admitted anxiously, tapping his fingers along the bar. “I came to terms with how things ended two years ago on that mountain. It was hard to digest then, and it took a long time to believe you weren’t just trigger-happy, that…you had your reasons for wiping them out, but…I’m concerned that if something goes wrong, that if you…lose her in some way someday, you will destroy everything in your path, and on your bloodthirsty quest to make things right, you will rot the last remnants of your soul because, let’s be honest here, you hardly have much of one left.”