It hurt when I thought about how I’d been these last couple of years. Katie deserved someone happy to raise her, not someone who bent and yielded at every crossroad, too afraid and consumed by guilt to laugh and have fun with her.
“I’m really glad we did this tonight,” I said as we walked out of the restaurant. “Once again, I have you to thank for a lovely, truly insightful evening.”
“I’m having a good time, too,” he said. “We should definitely do it again, but how about a walk first? I ate way too much to hit the sack right away.”
“I definitely feel the same way. I wonder how much we ended up eating. It feels like it was way more than it would’ve been if it was only a plate of food served.”
“It has to be much more.” He patted his flat stomach. “Let’s walk down the promenade. There’s an ice-cream place we can try if you’re up for it on the way back.”
“There’s always space for ice cream. Walking will just help create more space.” Jacob wrapped his hand around mine while we walked, holding it like it was an everyday occurrence.
When was the last time I held a man’s hand like this? I honestly couldn’t even remember. It felt good, though. Like everything else tonight.
We walked for about an hour, talking and eating our ice cream. When we got back to his car, I really wasn’t ready for the night to be over.
The parking lot we were in was dark, and his was one of the last cars left in it. Jacob climbed into the driver’s seat after closing the door behind me, turning in his seat before he started the engine.
His expression was soft and warm, open. “Should we go have a drink somewhere?”
I shook my head, digging deep for the confidence to do what I wanted to do. “I have a better idea.”
“Yeah?” He cocked his head. “What’s that?”
“This.” I leaned over the center console and placed my hands on his chest, lowering my mouth to his slowly enough that he could turn away if he didn’t want me to kiss him. He didn’t turn away.
One of his hands came around my back to gently pull me closer while the other burrowed into my hair, his fingers closing around the nape of my neck. Our lips brushed together softly at first, the briefest whisper of a kiss that sent micro butterflies aflutter inside me.
Awkwardly shuffling onto my seat, I tried to get even closer to him. My legs were at a weird angle, and I found myself cursing car manufacturers for not designing these things to have a bit more space to maneuver.
The tip of his tongue touched mine, sending a shiver through me that made my nipples harden and my panties damp. A soft moan escaped when our mouths met again. I threaded my fingers into his soft hair and braced myself with my free arm around his shoulders.
All too soon, the windows were steamed up and it would be obvious to anyone what we were doing in there. Reluctantly pulling back, I rested my nose beside his and tried to get my breathing under control.
“Your idea was much better than mine,” he whispered, his lips so close to mine that I felt them move when he spoke. “I hate that we have to go home to our own beds tonight.”
“Do we, though? I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to go home alone. Maybe we could sneak into your place. What time does Jamie usually leave?”
“She sleeps over often. How about I give her a call to find out if she can sleep there tonight? We can go back to your place. Just the two of us.”
“I think the girls would love a sleepover, but isn’t it too late of a notice for Jamie?”
He shook his head. “She always brings an overnight bag with her in case I end up working too late or whatever. Like I said, she’s been with us for a long time. She’s probably in bed already. The guest room is practically hers.”
My teeth sank into my lower lip while I thought. “If you’re sure it’s not going to be a problem.”
“Only one way to find out, but my phone is in my pocket.” He brushed the back of his hand against my nipple while trying to wedge his hand in between us, and another involuntary moan came out of me.
“I really hope she can sleep over,” I muttered as I moved back to give him space.
A minute later, we were on our way to my house. I smiled when Jacob reached for my hand and kept it under his. “She really is the best. I can’t believe it was that easy.”
He brought our joined hands to his mouth and kissed my knuckles. “She’s been a godsend, but I don’t think I’ve ever appreciated her more than I do tonight.”
“Will she be okay getting the girls to school in the morning?” I asked. I knew I was ruining the mood, but I needed to be sure before I ended up driving over there at some ridiculous hour of the morning just because I couldn’t relax.
Glancing at me in the dim interior of the cab, he waited until I brought my eyes to his before nodding firmly. “She’ll be fine. Really. She’s even studying early childhood education. The school knows her because she’s done several internships there. Just trust me, okay?”
I took a deep breath, releasing it slowly while I turned this new information over in my mind. “Okay, I trust you.”
Surprisingly, it was true. Jacob had a lot more experience with all this than I did, and more than that, I remembered how often Katherine and I stayed with our babysitter. We used to love it.
Katie had a sitter who used to watch her for my sister. I should contact her again.
The thought hit me like a ten-pound hammer. I’d been so obsessed with trying to be there for Katie twenty-four-seven that I’d never even thought about the fact that she had a babysitter who used to care for her too.
“What’s going on in that head of yours?” Jacob asked. “It looks way too serious to be thought of before I do what I’m about to do to you.”
“It’s nothing too serious. Just the blinders coming off some more, but that’s one way to snap me out of it.” I fanned myself, winking when I glanced at him. “I might need some more details, though. What exactly are you about to do to me?”
“That’s for me to know and for you to find out, but I think you’re going to like it. It involves you screaming my name for the rest of the night.”
I swallowed heavily, all the moisture in my body suddenly having decided to go on vacation down south. “I think you’re right. I think I will like that. I also can’t even really remember what I was thinking about before.”
“That’s okay. We’ll figure it out tomorrow morning. Until then, I plan on doing my best to keep you out of your head. I hope you’re okay with not getting much sleep tonight.”
“That’s a big game you’re talking, Mr. Parker. I hope you can keep your end of the bargain.”
“Oh, I’ll keep it,” he said. “That’s a promise.”
Chapter 30
Jacob
I should never have promised that I’d keep her up all night. We were barely in her bedroom and I, like her suitcase, was ready to explode.
Slow down, Jacob. Just breathe.
We hadn’t stopped kissing since we got inside, and a lamp had toppled over when we crashed into a side table in our haste to get to her room. I’d lost my shoes, shirt, and belt on the way, and the scooped neckline of Laurie’s soft dress had been pushed aside to reveal a black satin bra.