I’m worried that someone will see me leaving with Rhiannon, so instead of going over to talk to her, I send her another look, willing her to follow me outside. I even walk an extra block before I turn around and find her there, smiling.
“We’d make very good spies,” she says.
“The best,” I tell her. “I probably need to be back by ten, so we have…not much time.”
“That’s okay—I have to drive back tonight anyway. So I can, you know, drive in tomorrow morning.”
“I’m sorry you can’t stay over.”
“Yeah, I’m not really sure how I’d explain that one. My parents think I’m at Rebecca’s. Rebecca thinks I’m home, getting some sleep before the big day. If Rebecca and my parents ever start texting, we’re in big, big trouble.”
“Never introduce them.”
“It’s a little late for that.”
“Then I guess we’ll just have to be risky.”
“The best spies are.”
“Now, where to?”
“The Mall? It’s a few blocks that way. And, honestly, DC isn’t exactly the safest two-teen-girls-wandering-around-alone city. Let’s stick to the well-lit paths.”
“Lead the way.”
The sidewalks are busy even though the buildings are not. Most people seem to be in town for tomorrow…or maybe DC is just a city where everyone out on a Friday night seems like a tourist.
“So Nathan confirmed with Poole—he’ll meet you at the National Gallery food court at noon. You know it’s going to be crowded tomorrow, right?”
“The more crowded, the better, as far as I’m concerned.”
“Nathan also sent this.”
She holds out her phone so I can see Wyatt Giddings’s Facebook profile.
“That’s what he looks like. So you know who to look for.”
“Got it.”
“Assuming he doesn’t change first.”
“Yeah, assuming that.”
Rhiannon doesn’t look at me when she says, “I know this isn’t a normal conversation. It doesn’t have to be a normal conversation. I’m not expecting it to be.”
“But don’t you wish it were?”
“No. I think I’m realizing it won’t be. Or no. That’s not right. I’m realizing it won’t ever be normal for anyone who isn’t us. But if it becomes normal for us—that’s good. That’s all we can ask for.”
We’re at the Mall now. I turn left and see the Capitol, presiding like a bald man over his domain. I turn right and see the Washington Monument, a rocket too heavy to launch.
We sit down and it’s a little strange because I’m shorter than Rhiannon. I’m not used to that. Not that it matters—it’s just another minor adjustment.
“So what’s your name today?” she asks.
“Eboni.”
“Tell me about Eboni.”
I describe the bus ride down.
“Okay, but what about her? Have you gotten to know her at all?”
“Not really. I guess my mind’s been on other things.”
I can tell this isn’t the right answer.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
“Nothing. I just think of you as always knowing them, at least a little.”
“That makes it better?”
“I think it does.”
“You’re probably right. I’m just distracted by…myself.”
“Believe me, that’s easy enough to do. For all of us.”
I know this part is hard for everyone, not just us. The hot excitement of first meeting has to cool into the warm satisfaction of being together. I have visited all stages of relationships; I’ve just never been in one myself before. I feel like I’ve seen the map, but now I’m living in the actual landscape.
“Do you want to talk about your message last night?” I ask.
“Sure. I’m not even sure if it made any sense.”
“It did. I just—I don’t know what the answer is.”
“Neither do I. I only know we have to find it together. You tried to find it for both of us last time. That didn’t work. And you can’t try to find it for both of us tomorrow. Poole can’t offer you anything that will give us an answer. He may try. He may try to use it as leverage. But you can’t let him. I don’t want to be your weak spot.”
“And I don’t want to be your weak spot.”
“Then I guess we’re clear. About everything we’re unclear about.”
I push her hair over her ear. Look her in the eye. Feel so much love for her then that it feels like the love I have for life itself.
“Whatever we are,” I say, “whatever we do, I will always be grateful for whatever together we have. I know you have plenty of togethers in your life. But you’re the only one I have. And as hard as it is sometimes, and as much as it may hurt, it matters to me more than you can understand.”
She wraps me in a hug then. Really holds on to me. And whispers, “I understand.”
We stay like that for a few minutes, holding on and letting the city walk past us. Then we gather ourselves and reenter the world.
“Let’s talk about tomorrow,” she says.
Together, we go through the plan.
A
Day 6139
I wake up in a different room in the same hotel.
I should have known the risk—I am at a tourist hotel in a tourist destination. But it’s still a surprise to wake up in the body of a teenager visiting from the Philippines, to find so many thoughts in a language I don’t understand. Rudy also knows English, so at least I can translate the thoughts. I learn that his family is in America for a week; they’ve come from New York and are headed to Orlando tomorrow. They had no idea their trip would coincide with the Equality March.
I don’t need to access Rudy’s memories to know this. His parents are in the room, loudly agitated, peering out the window and arguing about what to do. I understand everything on a three-second delay, since I need to use Rudy’s memory to translate as best as I can.
Even though nobody’s asked my opinion, I say, “We’re here. We should see things.”