“You’re all flushed.”
What I am is angry, but I bite back the words because I know Becky is trying to help me. After she deems that I’ve cooled off enough, she hands me a tube of lipstick before dashing quickly into one of the stalls. I reapply it carefully while I wait for her to finish her business. She emerges a few minutes later, and after washing her hands and putting on another coat of her own lipstick, we’re back out.
“Are you going to tell Emmett what happened?” Becky asks, giving my hand a squeeze.
“No,” I say immediately, the word coming out harsher than needed. Forcing myself to take a deep breath, I repeat, this time calmer, “No, I don’t want to upset him.”
The look Becky shoots my way tells me she doesn’t agree, but she doesn’t contradict me either. And since we’re already back in the gym she doesn’t have time to. Becky pushes the door open, and we slide inside the gym just as Mrs. Burke announces: “And homecoming king is…” There is a slight pause to keep the suspense before she finishes, “Emmett Santiago.”
The lights find him immediately in the middle of the room. He looks genuinely surprised as his teammates push him toward the stage. A stage where Rose is waiting for him with a plastic crown on her head, and a smug smile on her lips.
Becky curses silently next to me as we watch Emmett get to the stage, accept his own crown, and pose for the photos with the rest of the homecoming court.
“This is such a stupid tradition,” Becky mutters, but I’m barely listening; my eyes are glued to the couple on the stage.
Mrs. Burke leans in to tell them something. Emmett pulls back, his eyes scanning the crowd, before Rose demands his attention. He shakes his head at whatever she’s saying, but she’s insistent. Finally, he sighs, giving in. Emmett takes her hand and leads her to the dance floor, the other couples following after them.
My stomach rolls in revulsion, everything that I’ve eaten earlier today wanting to make a reappearance.
Rose wraps her hands around him, moving way closer than necessary, and if I thought I wanted to rip her hair out earlier today, it has nothing on this feeling right here, right now.
Becky tugs on my arm. “Maybe we should go—”
I’m shaking my head no before she can even finish. There is no way I’m leaving. Not when Rose has her claws—quite literally—dug into Emmett.
No, I stand there, watching my boyfriend dance a slow song with another girl.
Rationally, I know it’s not his choice. I know if he could, it’d be me in his arms right now. I can see his eyes searching the crowd as they move over the dance floor. Looking for me.
But I keep to the shadows, hoping the darkness will help hide the ache deep in my chest. Knowing doesn’t make it hurt any less.
Do you really think that boy is your forever? Please, like he’ll settle for a girl like you.
Mom’s words ring in my mind, loud and clear, mocking me.
I know guys like him. They’re fine with playing with you for a little while, but when the world comes calling, and by the stories I’ve heard around town, it will, he’ll leave you without a backward glance. Is that what you want?
I didn’t want to believe her, but looking at Emmett with Rose, messes with my mind. It’s so easy to imagine him in a few years in some big hall of a fancy hotel, celebrating a win while playing for some professional team.
Because he’s that good. But he’s also kind, and caring, and genuinely nice.
He deserves it.
Emmett’s eyes catch mine just as the song dies down. He holds my gaze as he steps away from Rose. She tries to get his attention, but he’s already moving in my direction, determination written on his face.
He deserves it all.
And no matter how much it hurts, I know I’ll never be good enough for him.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
EMMETT
“Why so quiet?” I ask softly, my hand landing on Kate’s thigh. She jumps a little, surprised. It’s like she’s been stuck in her own world ever since she got back from the bathroom, and no matter how much I tried to reach her, I just couldn’t. “Is it the dance?” I ask once again. “Because I—”
“It’s not the dance. You did what was expected of you. I don’t blame you for that.”
“It’s a dumb tradition. I tried suggesting we each dance with our own dates, but…”
“That’s what Becky said.” Kate offers me a small smile, so small it’s barely noticeable. And just as quickly as it appears, it disappears once again. “It’s fine, really.” Pushing a strand of her hair behind her ear, she looks out of the window. “Where are we going?”
I take a quick glance in her direction. “Do you want to go home?”
I don’t want to take her home just yet, but if that’s what she wants, I won’t object. I just hope she doesn’t ask it because I’m not ready to say goodnight. Not yet.
“No,” she says quickly. “Not yet. I’m not ready for this night to end.”
There is something in her voice, something that I can’t quite pinpoint. But then Kate leans her head against my shoulder and lets out a soft exhale. Her body relaxes against mine. I put my arm around her shoulder, pull her closer, and lean down to brush my lips against the top of her head.
“I’m not ready for that either.”
For the rest of the drive we stay quiet, the only sound filling the cab of the truck is the low music coming from the stereo. I take a turn onto the familiar dark road, our only guide the faint moonlight and headlights illuminating the path in front of us.
“I don’t know why, but it always surprises me how peaceful it is out here,” Kate says as we get out at the pond.
“It really is, especially like this.”
I pull out the blanket and pillows, tossing them into the bed of the truck. Then I open the door and set everything up.
Placing my hands on Kate’s hips, I hoist her up and then follow after her.
We lie down on the blanket and look out at the sky covered in thousands of shiny stars. The air is chilly but still manageable, and the blanket definitely helps.
“When I need to think, or just want a moment to breathe, I come out here.”
Kate turns onto her stomach, propping her head on her palms. “What do you think about?”
“Life. Future. Just…” I shrug. “Stuff.”
I place my hand over hers, the tips of my fingers gliding over the soft skin.
“Nobody can bother you here, that’s for sure.”
I chuckle lightly. “It’s not just that, although it definitely helps.”
Our fingers intertwine, and I pull her down so she rests her head on my chest.
The silence stretches between us as I run my fingers softly through her loose strands, the only thing you can hear is a lone cricket and the hoot of an owl somewhere in the distance.
“What do you want?” Kate asks softly, breaking the quiet. “You said you think about your future. What do you want? Where do you see yourself?”
“This.” My answer is instant. I tuck my free hand behind my head and bring our twined fingers up so I can kiss the back of Kate’s hand.