He didn’t reply for the longest time. “And now?”
I shook my head. “I…I’m afraid of the way she makes me feel. Confused. Lost…needy.”
“She’s using the child in you to manipulate you.”
“Yes. I know. I hate that she has that hold over me.”
“Then break it. You loved her as an innocent child, unaware of what she was, uncaring even, because if you’d have known, it wouldn’t have mattered. You needed her protection, as all children need their mother’s protection, even if those mothers are monsters. The problem arises when those monsters turn on their offspring. When they demand things that should not be demanded.”
“She says she wants us to be together again.”
“Which means she wants you to free her.”
“I know.” I relaxed against him. “I know all this, but when she’s in my head, when it’s just the two of us and the memories and the old feelings…It’s hard.”
His gaze hardened. “You can’t let it be, Quinn. You can never slip and let her out. You loved her as a child and maybe she felt something for you too, but you can never forget why she had you. You’re her escape plan and that’s all. That’s why she needs you and wants you.”
I took a deep breath, absorbing this reality and letting go of the fake one the taint had tried to create.
“Hold on to who you are.” Tate stroked my cheek. “To me.” He kissed me softly. “To the Faoladh and to Dillon.”
“Always.” I kissed him, sliding my arm around his neck. “I love you so fucking much.”
He kissed the corner of my mouth. “I love you more, but I have to drag you out of bed now.”
“What? Why?”
“Lorenzo called…”
He didn’t have to say it, I could read his face. “Oh, shit. Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
He gave me a flat look.
Oh right, yeah, the sexy stuff had probably been a huge distraction. “How long do I have?”
“Till sunset tomorrow. Quinn, it’s going to be fine. We have a plan. Dillon says he can make you immortal.”
“What?”
“Yes, some kind of ceremony in Atlantis.”
No. That couldn’t be right. “That isn’t what he wants, though.”
“What do you mean?”
I shoved the covers off me. “I have to speak with him.”
“He’s downstairs with… But Quinn—”
I was already out the door.
I found Dillon in the conservatory sipping from a bottle of water. He stood up as I entered the room.
I placed my hands on my hips. “What are you doing?”
He looked confused and held up the bottle. “Drinking water?”
I made a sound of irritation. “No. The Atlantis stuff. Why did you say you could make me immortal?”
“Because I can. You know it’s possible.”
“Yes, but then you lose your chance to become mortal.”
He gave me a small smile. “I know.”
“But—”
“It’s what I want, Quinn. I realized it the moment we kissed on our little road trip. My feelings were confirmed when I thought I might lose you to that maze. Mortality is something I’ve wanted for the longest time, but I see now it was a fixation, to be part of an engine that had an end. An end to my loneliness. To the emptiness. But that end came in a form I could never have imagined.” He bridged the distance between us, his eyes darkening and changing color until they were the shimmering miasma of shades that were wholly Pontus. “It came in you, Quinn. I want to be with you for as long as forever.”
I scanned his face, looking for any sign of doubt but seeing only calm assurance. “Dillon…”
He tipped my chin up with the crook of his finger and claimed my mouth in a teasingly tempting kiss that promised so much more.
“Are you ready to become immortal, Quinn?”
“I…wait, isn’t there some kind of test?”
His eyes narrowed. “Yes, but I have a plan to extricate us from that.”
“You should go now,” Tate said from the doorway. “Lorenzo said sunset tomorrow, but we don’t want to take any chances. Bryce just called. The guys will meet you on the beach. They want to see you off.”
I nodded. “Where are Meri and Grumble?”
“In the kitchen,” Tate said.
I found my two house buddies sitting at the island. Grumble looked up at me with huge, sad eyes when I entered. Meri sat on his shoulder, red-eyed.
“Hey.” I pulled out a stool and parked my butt. “I’ll be back before you know it. This will all be over soon.”
Grumble sniffed. “Everything gone bad.”
“I know. I know things are rough right now, but we can get through this. We will get through it. Everything will be okay.”
“Just come back to us,” Meri said softly. “We can’t lose you too.”
I blinked back tears, then leaned in and hugged them. “Take care of the house for me.”
My gaze went to the stove, to Bea’s spot, and a wave of grief washed over me, leaving my throat and chest tight. It was time to go.
The moon was high. Almost full but not quite. But the sky was clear enough for it to shine unfettered and bright across the beach and ocean. I tipped my head up into its rays as we stepped off the cliffside steps onto the beach.
“It’ll be a blue moon,” Dillon said.
“Huh?”
“Once every two or three years we get an extra moon in one of the seasons. It’s called a blue moon. This moon will be our blue moon.”
I smiled up at him. “Since when do you know so much about moons?”
“The oceans are governed by the lunar cycles, Quinn. Not just tidal forces but the habits of the undersea creatures too. Mating seasons usually occur around full moons. And a waxing blue moon”—he smiled slow and easy, sending heat down to my toes—“is particularly potent.” He took my hand. “I see the guys.”
Sure enough, three powerful figures ambled across the sand toward us. We picked up the pace, meeting them at the water’s edge. They were bare-chested, barefoot, each wearing dark joggers. The forest’s scent clung to their skin and their beasts hovered just beneath their human skin, looking out at me through eyes that gleamed eerily in the moonlight.
“Meet-and-greet is set up at the boundary,” Bryce said. “We’ll keep the Mageri busy when they get here.”
“Just do what needs to be done and come back to us,” Jax said to me.
Emmit didn’t speak. He didn’t have to. His eyes spoke volumes, locking onto mine and communicating his disconcertion.
I approached him first and wrapped my arms around his waist, hugging him hard. “I’ll be okay. Dillon is uber powerful as Pontus. I’ll be safe with him.”
He sighed and folded his arms around me. “Hate that you go. Hate I not able protect you.”
I tipped my head up to take in his full mouth, his aquiline nose, and his eyes dark with conflict. There was nothing I could say that would assuage his turmoil, so I pushed up on my toes and kissed him softly on the mouth before pulling back slightly to whisper, “Laghet.”