“Stop it. Don’t speak to me like an invalid.”
It’s on the tip of my tongue to bite back at her tone, but I know she’s hurting, and I don’t kick my men when they are down. If striking out at me makes her feel better, I can take that for her and let her use it to heal. “What are you doing up at this hour?”
She stiffens, a shaft of light cutting across her bandaged knuckles. “I couldn’t sleep. I’m just going to the kitchen to get a drink.”
All my men have apartments, or houses, elsewhere. But they all also have rooms here in the penthouse to use at their will. My five are the only ones who can come and go without special permission. “I’ll walk with you.”
“No, it’s fine. I don’t need a babysitter. It’s just a drink.”
My patience only goes so far. I step closer and lean in. “Watch your tone, Andrea. I know you need to heal and that you don’t need to be coddled, but I’ll only put up with so much abuse before I bite back. And I always bite to kill.”
She ducks her chin. Submission has never been in her nature, and it hurts so badly to see it there now.
“Are you ready to tell me who I’ll eviscerate for hurting you?” She, like Valentina, hasn’t shared a single detail about her attackers or the attack. So far, the only information I’d gleaned was from the doctor’s medical report. And even then, it took some persuading to make him hand it over.
“Not yet. I’m not going to talk about it yet.” Her voice is thready, and her tone rushed.
If I thought she’d held her tongue so she could hunt these men down herself, I might let it stand. As of now, though, she hasn’t made a move to leave the penthouse once in the days after her attack. Worse, she won’t come to the meetings, nor will she let anyone help her outside of the care I insist on by the doctor.
I step around her, giving her a wide berth so I don’t brush against her. “For now, I’ll leave it alone, but I won’t forever. Get whatever you need done, done because once my own business is handled, we are going hunting.”
I don’t wait to hear if she will comply or not before I turn and head back to my bedroom. All of this defiance grates on me, and the need to control rises up enough that I’ll need to work out or hit a punching bag to take some of the edge off. Or else I’ll end up taking my rage out on my men. Like Kai.
Hot stinging guilt winds its way into my chest. Since Valentina showed up, I’ve done nothing but treat Kai poorly. If he wouldn’t fail me, I wouldn’t be doing so, but here we are, stuck in a vicious circle.
When I’d pulled up the video feeds, I saw them together in the hallway…him handing her something while looking grimmer than usual. I’ll keep that under wraps for now as long as Valentina starts being a little more forthcoming. I already know she won’t let me hurt Kai for her sake, so…if I have to, I’ll put a gun to his head and force him to his knees all over.
My angel is going to give me answers whether she likes it or not.
11
VALENTINA
The second he left, it felt like the air had been sucked out of our bedroom. The ruin of our bedroom after Adrian let loose his rage on it. Strangely, even though the décor and glass flew around precariously close to me, not for one second did I feel unsafe. Before…I couldn’t even walk into the same room as Sal without the ice fingers of dread creeping up my spine.
I lie on my side in our bed, which still smells like him. My skin feels clammy and sticky, but I don’t care. Even the faint throb in my neck reminding me I’m stuck here forever is more of a relief than anything else.
Or it would be. I spread my fingers across my still flat belly. At some point, I’ll need to speak to the doctor Adrian seems to keep stashed around here in a closet. Worse…I’ll have to tell Adrian and face whatever that flavor of his rage looks like. It’s not like I have a choice.
I peek over my shoulder at the clock, an ugly ornate thing I’ve never liked. Pity he didn’t smash that in his redecorating. It’s early in the morning. As if reminding me, my stomach lets out a large gurgle. Soon, I’ll have to venture out and find something to eat. For now, though, all I want to do is lie in this bed and savor the still lingering warmth his body left behind. The scent of him. The feel of his naked skin against my own.
A shiver rolls through me, and I curl sideways to grab the bunched-up bedding on the floor. Once I shake some glass from the folds, I drag it over my body. It smells like him too, and I inhale that spicy ginger scent of him all over. Gods, I love that smell. I love him. More than anything.
A slippery spiral of guilt worms through me. I left to protect our baby, and I left to protect him as well. Now that I don’t have a choice to leave again, I’ll have to trust him. Trust that he’s stronger than I’m giving him credit for. Trust he’s not the monster so many people told me he was when we first met. Not that I’ve seen any hint of that man since we’ve been married.
Is he stubborn? Volatile? Overbearing? Of course. But he’s never made me feel like a lesser person than him. Never made me feel like he’d hurt me for the enjoyment of it.
Or am I trying to rationalize things out of my own fear? I don’t know.
I clutch the blankets into a bunch and tuck them under my cheek, settling into the pillow to think about it more. Just as I let my eyes close, the door of our bedroom bursts open to hit the wall behind it with a heavy thud.
Adrian marches in, seemingly oblivious to the glass littering the floor, despite wearing nothing but his underwear.
Even with his handsome face lined in anger, he’s breathtaking.
I sit up, letting the covers fall into my lap. “Be careful. You’ll get glass in your feet.”
His only answer is to scowl at me. Then he tosses something on the bed and plants his fists down to surround it.
I’m not sure if I’m supposed to look at what he’s hovering over or if I should stay still and wait to learn what else I’ve done to upset him.
“What do you have to say about this?” He stands and waves at the object.
This time, I pull the blankets to get a better look, and my heart stops dead in my chest. Frozen. I’m sure I look as frozen as I feel on the inside too. “I…”
No. I’m not ready to get into this with him. I thought I’d have a little time to prepare, figure out how to break it to him in a way that won’t get me tossed out or, worse, killed by his own hand.
While I’ve never felt unsafe when I’m with him, his temper is lightning quick sometimes. What if he reacts before thinking, and there’s no way back?
I swallow hard, trying to get more words out before he starts demanding them. “I…don’t know what you want me to say.”
“The truth.” His tone is calm and even, despite the rigid set of his shoulders and the tightening down his abs. “I only ever want the truth from you, Valentina. I thought I made that perfectly clear.”
He grabs the photo and moves it to the bedside table, facedown. I try not to flinch when he climbs up onto the bed beside me. He reaches out, but I can’t let him hold me, not with these secrets between us.
I shuffle backward as fast as I’m able, my throat still clogged on the words I need to say. All of them backed up and unable to break free. “I can’t…I don’t…” I know it’s not enough…not anywhere near enough to explain anything to him.