Kara joins me and sits down in front of the fire. “Are we eating on the floor?”
Still standing, I hand her one of the containers. “Is that okay with you?”
She snatches the food and opens the top, breathing in the scent with a sigh. “I don’t remember the last time I’ve had a cheeseburger.” Kara grabs the burger and shoves it into her mouth. Ketchup and mustard coat the corner of her mouth, but she keeps on chewing. Out of all the days I’ve had with her, this one has been the most amusing.
I sit down beside her and pop a fry into my mouth. “What’s your favorite thing to eat?”
Kara tilts her head back, still chewing a mouthful of burger. “Right now, this cheeseburger.” She takes another bite and closes her eyes. “But nothing beats a pot of homemade soup on the fire. It’s been two centuries, but I still recall the taste.”
My parents are old enough to know what that’s like, but I didn’t grow up in that time. It fascinates me, though. “What was it like living back then?”
Kara finishes her burger and leans her back against the couch. The fire flickers in her eyes, and I can’t seem to look away from her. “It was magical. The land was clean and pure, not disgusting and polluted like it is now. I miss it.”
“I wish I knew it the way you do,” I admit wholeheartedly.
A sad smile spreads across her face when she looks at me. I can tell she’s still a little drunk by the way her eyes are glazed over. “I can see it clear as day. My grandmother used to make the most delicious roasted apples on the fire. I used to grind the cinnamon for her.” She blows out a sigh and focuses on the fireplace, her eyes twinkling in the light. “I love the smell of cinnamon. At my house in Virginia, all I have are cinnamon candles. Every time I light them, I get reminded of my grandmother.”
She climbs up on the couch and lies down. I can feel sadness all around her. Sliding over, I rest my arms on my knees and stare at her, even though she doesn’t look away from the fire. “What happened to her? Was she part of the pack war with the royals?”
I know one set of her grandparents was involved, but I don’t know about the rest of her family.
Closing her eyes, Kara shakes her head. “This was my mom’s mother. She was loving and kind, never aggressive or mean to anyone, not even to the humans who lived in the village next to us.”
Hearing the sorrow in her voice, I can already tell her grandmother didn’t have a happy ending. “You don’t have to tell me,” I murmur.
Kara swallows hard. “It’s okay. I haven’t spoken about it since it happened.” She grabs one of the pillows on the couch and slides it under her head, clutching it tightly. “One night, she shifted and went for a run. The village next to us had problems with animals killing their livestock. When one of the men saw her as a wolf in the woods, he assumed she was the culprit. So he shot her four times with his bow and arrow. They went right through her.”
I’ve never known that kind of pain, but I can feel hers. I lift my hand to touch her cheek, but I pull it back. “I’m sorry, Kara. I can’t imagine losing someone so close to me. What did your grandfather do?”
A tear falls down her cheek, but she wipes it away. “He was overwrought with anger and grief, so he went after the villager and ripped him apart. After that, he disappeared into the woods, and we found him a year later, starved to death. He was nothing but skin and bones.”
“He lost his mate,” I whisper. I would’ve killed the villager, too. Shit, I might’ve done a lot worse than that.
Kara sighs. “I’ve heard it’s the worst feeling in the world. Most wolves would prefer death over losing their mate.” Her eyelids flutter, and her head sinks farther into the pillow.
“Did you think Zayne was going to be your mate?” I ask, trying to keep her awake.
Blowing out a breath, she opens her eyes. “At first, I did.”
“I know I asked you if you loved him, but I never asked if you still do.”
Her eyes bore into mine. “I stopped loving Zayne a long time ago.”
“Then why did you try to hurt Amelie if you didn’t want him?”
“Because,” she whispers, turning away from me, “I wanted Zayne to feel my pain.”
Her breathing slows, and her shoulders relax. I get to my feet, gently pick her up in my arms, and carry her to the stairs. Her arms wrap around my neck, and she clutches me tight. I don’t want to let her go.
“Where are we going?” she asks, her voice just above a whisper.
Leaning into her, I breathe her in. She smells like a mixture of wintertime and apples, very sweet yet clean and crisp like snow. Then again, she is a royal arctic. “To bed. I think you’re done for the night.”
She opens her mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. Once upstairs, I open her bedroom door and carefully lay her down once I have her comforter pulled back. After I slide off her shoes and cover her with the blankets, I sit down beside her and brush a strand of her blonde locks away from her face.
“Kara?”
“Mm-hmm,” she moans, keeping her eyes closed.
“If you could go back and change things, would you?”
She doesn’t hesitate. “Yes. I would’ve stayed in Virginia. Then I’d be free.”
I can hear the truth in her words. “I believe you,” I utter, wondering if she even heard me.
Slowly, I slide off her bed, but then she reaches out and grabs my wrist. Her eyes open halfway, and her grip tightens. “Stay with me,” she whispers.
Hearing those words makes me want to do things I shouldn’t be thinking about. Tonight is a full moon, which means everything we feel is heightened. Resting on my knees, I get on her level so she can see me. She lets my wrist go, but then her hands cup my cheeks, and she pulls me down to her lips, all warm and inviting. Her tongue pushes into mine, and like a starved man, I deepen the kiss, desperate to taste more of her. My hands grip the back of her neck, and she moans. As sexy as her whimpers are, it breaks me out of the spell.
Slowly, I pull away and let my hands slide away from her neck. “I have to go.”
With her eyes closed, Kara pulls the covers in closer to her body. “Maybe next time.”
Next time? I doubt there will be one. She’s drunk, and I knew I shouldn’t have taken advantage of the situation. Nevertheless, every part of me wants her. I long to feel her body wrapped around me as I claim every inch of her, to claim her as mine.
Up the road, I can hear Cameron and the others in my pack approach. It’s time for our run. Quietly, I make it to the door and take one last look at Kara, asleep on the bed.
What the fuck am I going to do now?
15
CHASE
Last night was the first full moon where I didn’t enjoy my run. My mind wasn’t in it. All I wanted was to be close to Kara. Instead, Arlo stayed to watch over her while I ran with the pack. The others knew something was off with me, but thankfully, none of them asked. I don’t even know what to tell them.
I can hear the front door of my house open, and I already know who it is. Cameron isn’t the type to let things go, so I should’ve known he’d be here first thing this morning. His footsteps draw closer to my study, but I don’t turn around when I sense him at the door. Instead, I keep my focus on the window, on my vineyard down the hill.