“Giddy, everyone already knows I killed a girl! You think they’re going to care about Seth’s photos when they have it in writing that I wanted Melody dead and planned out how to do it?”
He exhales loudly. The cab is still bitingly cold, and my entire body shakes. “Show me the photos,” he says.
I pull out my phone and Gideon glances away from the road to view the eyeless yearbook photo of Melody. Then I dig out the print of Melody in the drugstore. “Well, do you think it’s enough?”
His shoulders roll. “It’s something. If they could trace those text messages he sent you, it would be solid.”
“He used a burner.” The texts won’t do anything but give Seth an edge. The next few minutes crawl by in silence. I should keep my mouth shut. “Why are you hanging out with Gracie Davenport?”
“Leave her out of this.”
The command is curt and final, and it stings. The cab has started to warm, but the space between us is like ice. I’m not sure it will ever melt away. “Fine,” I say, opening the chain of anonymous threats. I read. Reread. “I’ll show them everything.”
Gideon removes a hand from the wheel and squeezes my shoulder. “It’ll be fine, Cass. You’re doing the right thing.”
The right thing. If I do what Gideon wants, I’ll be walking out of that diner with my hands cuffed behind my back. I grip the phone tighter between my clammy hands. The trees in my periphery blur and zigzag until I shut my eyes and take a deep breath.
I exhale, open my eyes, and delete the entire chain.
* * *
An hour later, I walk out of the diner unsteadily, like I can’t remember where we parked. Gideon is waiting on the curb, where he promised he’d be if I needed him, and I sit down beside him. Inside, Detective Sawyer listened to me and looked at the photos. She asked to keep the print. Then she thanked me and said I could go.
I keep waiting to expel that big sigh of relief—especially after seeing the grateful look on the detective’s face—but it never comes. It just hangs in my chest, suffocating me.
It isn’t just that breath stuck in there. It’s also my secrets. My guilt. I thought they’d be purged along with any statement to the cops, but the sickening feeling refuses to budge. “I couldn’t do it,” I say, staring at the gum-encrusted sidewalk. “I’m sorry. I panicked.”
Gideon doesn’t speak. I wait for him to get up and drive off without me, but he just sits there. I don’t know what else to say. I failed him. I failed this town. Most of all, I failed Melody. It doesn’t matter what I discovered. It doesn’t matter that I single-handedly found her killer and worked up the guts to turn him in.
Melody is not coming back. She’s gone. My fears, my selfishness, kept everyone from helping her, and nothing I ever do will change that.
Gideon stands up, offering me a hand. I take it, and he pulls me to my feet. But he doesn’t look at me as we walk to his truck.
I made a choice. And I lost him.
Now I have to go home and wait. Wait to see if Seth talks his way out of this, using me as the scapegoat. And I have to do it without Gideon, which is fine because I don’t deserve him.
I guess I never did.
22
After practice the following afternoon, Asher and I turn on the TV for the first time in weeks. We’re watching a reality special about the world’s most brilliant jigsaw puzzle–solving teens, when a local news story breaks. An update on the Melody Davenport case.
My heart thumps in time with the blue lights flashing on the screen.
The news reporter finishes going over the basics of the case—not that I need a recap—and a photograph of a young man appears on the screen. Seth Greer. The reporter goes on to explain that this young man has been arrested concerning Melody’s alleged homicide.
“Wow, Cass.” Asher’s eyes are fixed on the screen.
“I know,” I breathe. After Gideon dropped me off yesterday, I apologized to Asher about the Brandon stuff and the way I’ve been acting lately. I needed someone on my side. He said all was forgiven, but he still seemed wary of me. His eyes were vacant. I broke something between us, and my attempt to fix it felt like slabbing on cheap glue.
At least we’re on speaking terms now. He wasn’t happy about my investigative work, but he eased up when I told him about Seth’s collection and the threats.
Now, my hands shake as I look at Seth’s photo on the screen and listen to the story of how my efforts actually ended in someone’s arrest.
The reporter continues, explaining that Melody’s DNA was found in the trunk of Greer’s car. Anyone with information concerning the case is encouraged to call the Oregon State Police Department. A telephone number flashes in yellow at the bottom of the screen.
A little cry of relief escapes my lips. I clear my throat as Asher’s eyes drift to me. My chest relaxes, but not all the way. An unsettling thought needles its way into my mind and takes up residence there: I wish the reporter had mentioned the necklace. Just to eliminate all questions forever and put me in the clear.
Still, the police found Melody’s DNA. The fact the detectives haven’t come for me means that DNA evidence prevailed over the notebook.
“You did good, Cass.” Asher scoots closer to me on the sofa, wrapping an arm around my shoulder. “That creep is getting what he deserves.”
* * *
I’m setting out forks and plates for dinner when my phone buzzes.
I grab it. Gideon.
It’s over.
I heard. They got him. Giddy, I’m really sorry.
I go back to the table, letting the utensils clink against the plates. Then I push my pride aside and send another text.
Do you want to come over? Asher’s here. We can watch a movie.
Sorry, I can’t.
Of course not. You’re busy with Gracie Davenport. I growl, slamming a knife down so hard it pierces through the tablecloth.
Over by the stove, my mom startles. “Cass, what’s wrong?” She checks and stirs her dish one more time before setting the spoon down. Then she steps closer, straightening her apron and peering at me.
“Nothing. I’m sorry. It’s just Gideon.”
My mom hasn’t asked about Gideon. She probably figured I was fine with my replacement friend. I expect her to ask now, but she doesn’t.
“Also, I just… Did you hear about what happened with Seth?”
Mom winces. “Yes, sweetie, I did. I know you’re close with Emily. Is that what this is about?”
I nod. “People already teased her relentlessly because of Seth. And that was when it was all just rumors. Now…” My eyes wander to the sizzling meat on the stove.