“I would like to come in. But how do you feel? Do you think you can control yourself?”
Jack kept petting Duchess with one hand while he reached for the jug of blood with the other and took a long gulp before answering. “Yes. I’ve had a lot to drink, and sunrise is close enough that I’m feeling sleepy already.”
“Well, then, I’ll come in for a little while.” Damien took the chair from the desk and moved it beside the bed. Not too close, but not as far away as it had been, either. He set the picnic basket beside him, wondering when would be the right time to share what was inside with Jack.
They sat there in silence while Jack drank from his blood jug and petted Duchess. Finally, Damien said, “You have Netflix down here, you know.” He jerked his chin at the television.
“Oh, good. Movies,” Other Jack said, picking up the remote. “Do you want to watch something with me?”
“Sure. It’ll need to be something short, though, if you’re going to pass out pretty soon.”
“Um, do you have a series here called Make the Date?”
“I don’t think so. What is it?”
“OMG, it’s awesomesauce. It’s about these two guys—gay, of course.” Jack paused.
“Of course,” Damien said automatically. Just as he had said so, so many times before. He blinked fast, not wanting to spoil the moment with tears. “What about the two guys?
“Well, it’s a dating reality show. Only the gays run the whole thing—who’s fixed up with who, what they wear, how their hair and makeup look, where they go on the date. They even get to choose if the couples have another date together, or they can trade them for another contestant on the show. At the end of each season there is at least one proposal. And drama. So much drama. You’d love it.”
“It sounds divine, but I’m sure we don’t have it here. We do have a show I’m 100 percent sure you’ll love. It’s called Project Runway. Ever heard of it?”
“Nope.”
“Okay, good. Give me the remote and I’ll find the latest season for you. Wait till you see Tim Gunn. He’s fantastic. I actually met him recently at a House of Night party in New York, and he’s as fantastic in real life as he seems on the show.” Damien leaned forward, his arm extended and hand held out for the remote.
Without any hesitation, Jack gave him the remote.
Their fingers touched. Their eyes met.
Slowly, ever so slowly, Damien splayed his fingers so that even though the remote was between them, he could still feel the warmth of Jack’s skin.
When Jack’s eyes began to turn rust colored, Damien released him and leaned back in the chair as if nothing had happened.
“Okay, let’s see. Oh, here’s the button.” He was punching in P-R-O-J-E-C-T when Jack’s words tore at his heart.
“I missed you so much. You left me. All alone. In that terrible, terrible world. You left me.”
Damien put the remote in his lap and turned his chair to face Other Jack.
“In this world, it was you who left me.”
“Not on purpose, right? Zoey said my death was made to look like an accident, even though she thinks it had something to do with Neferet. But whether it did or not, I for sure didn’t go on purpose. You did. You killed yourself.”
Damien drew a deep breath and let it out slowly before he could speak. “How? How did I kill myself?”
“You ran a bath and slit your wrists. I found you like that. Dead. Cold. Bloody. It was the worst thing that has ever happened to me. Not even this,” he gestured violently to the outline of the red crescent on his forehead, “is worse.”
“I’m sorry, Jack. I’m so sorry.” Then, slowly, Damien began to tell Other Jack what he had never told anyone ever before. “But I understand your Damien. I’ve felt that same depression—that same hopelessness.”
“In this world, too?”
Damien nodded.
“But only after I died, right?”
Damien sighed heavily. “No. Before. A long time before. I’ve felt sad and broken for as long as I can remember. It’s why I’ve always been into books and studying. It helps me escape. And my depression got better when I was Marked and came here. I was accepted here. I wasn’t bullied anymore, or not much anyway. Well, not at all after Erik Night made me his roommate, but that’s another story. Then you were Marked, and we fell in love. And I thought the terrible sadness had gone away, but it hadn’t. It was like it was sleeping and waiting.”
“For what?”
“For a quiet time. A normal time. A time when I wasn’t newly in love, or busy helping Z save the world. Basically, it was waiting for life to go on. And then it woke up, and I’ve been trying to put it back to sleep ever since. It’s just today, just a few minutes ago, that I realized there is no putting it to sleep. I have to fix it, heal it—heal myself.”
“How?”
“I’m not really sure, but I do know coming down here and being with you is a step toward healing. I also know I have to talk about my feelings. Have to admit I need help.” Damien held out his hand. Hesitatingly, Other Jack took it. “I love you, Jack Twist. In any world. In any form. I love you, and if it is within my power, I will never, ever leave you. I want you to know that.”
“I love you, too, Damien. All I want is you. You’re all I’ve wanted since the day I met you.”
Damien couldn’t help himself. He didn’t want to help himself. He wanted Jack. He pulled on Jack’s hand, bringing him closer. Carefully, moving deliberately so that Jack was aware of what was coming, Damien drew him closer and closer—until their lips were only a breath apart.
“Please kiss me,” Damien murmured.
Jack did. It was a sweet, innocent kiss. Their lips barely rested on one another’s.
Damien blocked out Jack’s smell and focused on the way his lips felt. They were the same—still soft and full. He still had no stubble, only a sweet smattering of peach fuzz that tickled with beloved familiarity. Damien reached up and let his hand caress Jack’s hair. And it was Jack’s hair—soft, slightly curly, and a little too long—or too short, depending on your sense of style. But either way—perfectly Jack. With a moan, Damien deepened the kiss, finding Jack’s tongue.
Jack’s arms went up to wrap around Damien’s shoulders.
And then Duchess started to whine at the exact moment Other Jack’s hand slid from his shoulders toward Damien’s neck.
Damien felt the change within Jack instantly.