“What is it?” Apprehension quickened my pulse as anticipation caused delicious licks of excitement to flare in my veins. I wanted another job.
“It’s going to be a tough one. A takedown.”
Disappointment quieted the tumult inside me. Not my first choice, but I had enjoyed twisting the screws on Alec. There was always something to savor.
“I thought you only did election rigging and things like that.”
“Not always, and this one is specifically for you. The person we have to take down is Gideon.”
CHAPTER 26
I FLASHED HOT and cold and hot again. “Haley.” I couldn’t control the quaver in my voice. “I can’t. It’s Gideon. You know what he means to me.”
Haley’s face was a mask of indifference, but her eyes were bright with what looked like pity. “This is the job. You knew that coming in. There’s a price for us to pay, too. Protection and favors don’t come for free, Ember.”
Emotion would get me nowhere with Haley. Regardless of whether she agreed with me or not, she was too pragmatic about our roles in the Red Court to be moved by tears. I cleared my throat and adjusted my approach. “But he’s my best friend. How could I pull this off without him noticing? I know things about his life no one else does. I can be careful, but I’m not sure I can be that careful.”
I was wrong. There was a line for me, and we’d just reached it.
“It’s because you know him like no one else that you can do it. You said he was entering a photo in the Winter Showcase, right? That could be your platform.”
No, I can’t.
Panic was choking me, stealing the air from my lungs. I was fighting the frantic need to escape the claustrophobia setting in. I had to get out of here before I lost it. I needed more time to think, to think and find a way out of this. Given a few days, I could plan my way out of anything. I had to buy some time.
“Give me the dossier.” I extended my hand to Haley.
Her head tilted ever so slightly to the left, her disbelief at my quick change of heart evident.
“I’m not going to do anything right now, but I’ll look through what you have.”
She gave an approving nod and dug out the folder from her bag. This, at least, she could believe. “I’ll text you the email account details so you can access the list of people who owe us favors.”
I turned without a goodbye and left the room. For once, I was glad for the lack of pleasantries. No goodbyes or unnecessary chatter, just the sound of the door clicking shut behind me.
* * *
I was on autopilot driving home, my mind tangled up in a mess of half-baked solutions. What could I do to get out of this and maintain my place in the Red Court?
Who could possibly want to take Gideon down? He was sarcastic, sure, but he meant well and mostly orbited the drama instead of being the gravitational force at the center of it all. There was no one on my radar who might want to hurt Gideon.
Gideon was my sounding board on any normal problem; a caustic sounding board, but still someone I could air my thoughts to. Just telling him when I was struggling to make a decision helped. Who could I go to now? Certainly not Gideon. I’d have to tell him eventually, but this was not the kind of problem you presented without a ready solution.
April’s window winked in the afternoon sun as I pulled into the driveway. My sister had been instrumental in helping me get into the Red Court, telling me what she remembered about its members from the ever-present rumors that cast a specter-like shadow over Hell High.
She might have some insight into my situation or another angle to consider that I couldn’t see. Some perspective would do me good right now. I wasn’t sure who would win if I had to pick between saving my best friend and settling the score for my sister. The mere thought of choosing between the two made my stomach seize and threatened to bring my lunch back for a curtain call.
I dropped my bags in the hall and raced to April’s room, clutching the dossier. April was at her desk listening to music and looking through Instagram on her computer. I paused at her door and watched as she scrolled through Alec’s feed. Why was she so intent on torturing herself with his new life? Why would she even want to get back together with him?
I cleared my throat and April startled in surprise, quickly closing the window and wiping away the happy couple in front of the azure sea and sugar-white sand, revealing a spreadsheet. I didn’t miss the classic put-a-ring-on-it pose of Alec’s new fiancée, holding her left hand up to the camera and a megawatt smile plastered on her face.
“Hey,” I said.
April sat silent, refusing to meet my eyes.
“How’s the retreat planning going?”
The physical therapy center’s annual retreat was coming up soon, and from the bits April had shared over dinner, it was going to be great. She’d managed to come in under budget, with more activities and participants than ever.
A smile lit her face. She was proud of her work. I knew it was important to her to be a part of something, doing real good for others. “It’s going. I’m getting tired of the last-minute changes from the director. But there’s something you need, right? It’s all over your face,” she said with wry amusement.
Stupid face.
“Right. I have a problem, and I’m hoping you can help.”
Her stare gained an interested glint.
“I got a Red Court assignment that I can’t complete. I’m hoping you can help me find a way out of it. It’s a hit,” I continued, “and I just...can’t.”
April turned in her chair to face me fully. “How is this different from the things you’ve already done?”
April’s role as devil’s advocate was not unfamiliar. It’s what made her a good person to talk to when you couldn’t find your way. She’d force you to widen your lens—like switching your camera settings from square to pano, there was more to every situation if only you’d open your eyes.
“The things I’ve done, I can live with the cost. I made peace with being in the gray area between right and wrong, but I think this might push me farther than I’m willing to go.” I paused, considering my words, and how even though they were technically true, I still felt that something inside me had changed. The girl who emerged from deep inside when I needed to be a heartless follower of the Queen of Hearts was making more frequent appearances, and I enjoyed being her more and more with each task, relished the fact that I could enjoy the work. Would any good parts of me remain when this was all over? I couldn’t admit that to April. If I did, she would tell me to stop immediately.
“So far, nothing has changed the person I see in the mirror.” My heart felt heavy with the lie. The last person I could be totally truthful with was slipping away.