She clicked delete, then located his name in her contacts list and deleted his number altogether. Shit. That’s him officially gone. Should I have done that?
She bit her lip and looked up at the ceiling with a forlorn frown. She was doing the right thing by staying strong and ignoring him, wasn’t she?
Her phone buzzed. Selena’s heart skipped a few beats. She grabbed the phone immediately to see a text from Dee and breathed a sigh of relief. She wouldn’t acknowledge the disappointment that hid behind that sigh.
You killed it last night, Lena. Your pictures are all over the Internet and you look amazing. Congratulations to my high-flying, beautiful friend. X
She replied, Thanks gorgeous. I’ve saved you a goody bag. I think you and I need a holiday together soon. You in? X
She smiled at the thought of unwinding and laughing with the one person who was always there with a positive pep talk in life. She would lavish Dee with some proper treats soon. And having a project—holiday planning—would keep her mind off, other things. Things beginning with N.
46
Four months passed. Four long months of late-night bar shifts and sleeping on the sofa. Nick passed his master’s with flying colours. As he pulled on his black graduation gown, he stood tall. This was the moment he had been waiting for. He wanted to feel that certificate in his hands, as a confirmation that after several false starts, he was finally finished with studying.
“Well done, Nick,” his lecturer enthused with a hard pat on the back. “Remember to give my mate a call. He has an opening in the overseas marketing department which you would be great at. I’ve put in a good word for you.”
Nick’s grin was so large it was almost painful. “I’ll definitely call him, thanks Steve,” he said.
Life was finally drama free. Chris had been quiet for a while, which for once was a good thing. He was holding down a job and spending the rest of his time gaming in his living room—a far healthier habit than rubbing shoulders with dealers.
His mum held onto his arms and looked up into his green eyes. She was silently weeping.
“I’m so proud of you.”
Nick’s heart swelled. He kissed her gently on the forehead before putting on his mortar-board hat.
“Nick Harvey?” called the photographer.
He held the fake rolled-up certificate and flashed a grin towards the camera. Each step in this formulaic process of graduation was exactly what he had been longing for. It was the end of a gigantic struggle and he would savour every moment.
After the ceremony, where they all shook hands with the school Dean and listened to speeches by tycoons who had made it big internationally, the graduates spilled out onto the steps of the concert hall.
Nick bounced down the steps, clutching his scroll, grinning at his mum who was waiting on the bottom step. A black Mercedes passed and as the electric window wound down, the reflection of the sun bounced off the glass and caught his eye. Selena. His breath caught in his throat and he stopped in his tracks. Her hand pressed on the half-open window as she pulled her face out to meet his gaze. It was definitely her. He swore he could see a smile on her lips as the car continued down the road.
He stood, frozen on the third step, watching the car become a black blob in the distance and then disappear altogether in the throng of city traffic. His heart had lifted and swelled to see her, but now he was on a major comedown after that fleeting high. His chest ached and his breath was suspended, still trapped in his chest.
“Nicky? You all right, love?” his mother asked.
He took a sharp breath and shook his head out of its foggy daze. “Yeah, let’s skip the formalities here and do lunch,” he said, pulling off his long, black gown. “My treat.”
As they walked, his mother began to tell him about a new women’s social club she’d joined around the corner from Nick’s place.
“Brenda from the group says I’m a natural at floral arranging, you know. I think meeting new people has done me a world of good. I’d never have done that if you hadn’t made me move in with you. They’ve even been asking for deposits for the bus trip up north next summer. Do you think I should go?”
“Yeah,” Nick said, flashing his mother a grin. As she continued to talk, he couldn’t stop his mind from wandering. His heart was still attempting to settle into its normal rhythm after that blast from the past. It had been months since he last saw Selena, but the feelings were evidently as raw as ever. That had to mean something.
The surge of energy he’d felt at just the sight of her face. Surely it was a sign that there were still some glowing embers in the ashes of their relationship. He longed to know if she felt the same. He had to know if it was possible to nurture those embers back into flames. His rush of thoughts was interrupted by Mandy tugging on his sleeve.
“What about this place? I’ve never eaten French food,” she asked, flashing an excited smile. It was good to see her so happy. She looked so much brighter, younger even.
Nick’s eyes roamed over the bistro. Glittering chandeliers beckoned them in over the threshold and the floor was decked out in large black and white square tiles. Candles dripped in wine bottles on every table and pictures of the Eiffel Tower and kissing couples lined the deep red walls. It was Paris on speed. It was all a bit over the top for Nick, especially as it was the city he wanted furthest from his mind right now. Too many memories.
“Sure,” he said, forcing a smile and gesturing for his mum to enter first.
A large wooden mannequin, sporting a curled moustache and a dinner jacket with tails welcomed them with a chalkboard sign, which read, “Please take a seat… bon apetit.”
Over French onion soup and large glasses of rich Beaujolais, Nick’s mind began to wander again, while Mandy relayed the comings and goings of the upcoming flower contest she was entering.
His eyes darted over the framed photographs and the dusty wine bottles at the bar, making a mental list. He knew exactly what he needed to do to reach out to Selena. Whether or not she would welcome his attempt to give her a good old-fashioned wooing was another matter, but he was willing to take a risk. What was the worst that could happen? A slap in the face? Being publicly rejected by the most amazing woman on the planet? None of that could possibly hurt as much as the reality of never even taking another shot. He simply had to try.
47
Selena looked out onto the gently shimmering city scene framed by her enormous window. It would be dark soon and street lights and office blocks were casting a glow in the early evening twilight. She sat in silence, admiring the view for a few moments, tired and ready to call it a day.
“Selena, a courier just brought an urgent note in for you,” Nancy said, popping her head round the door.
“Oh?” She spun her chair round to leave the living artwork that was her window and reached out to take the note. Nancy lingered, but when Selena stuck a finger tip in the corner of the envelope and hesitated, shooting a quick glance from under furrowed brows, she quickly turned and scuttled out. Selena tore at the envelope and read the letter aloud. “Thank you for your generous donation to the Children’s Disfigurement Support and Counselling Service. What?”
She took a sharp inhale of breath and raised her fingers to her lips. She shook her head. She hadn’t donated to that particular cause. Who might have done so on her behalf? It couldn’t be the one person she thought might have done it. It had been too long since she’d given him the money.