Avril knows more about the situation, though. She’s the one who was there the day my dad showed up out of the blue at our apartment. She’s the one who saw my reaction. She’s the one I had no choice but to show my vulnerability to, and she’s the one who stepped up to the plate to protect me.
Avril’s the one who, when it was all over, didn’t force me to talk about it. She respected my need to keep that private, and I was more grateful to her for that than anything.
Except there’s one other thing that had set Avril apart from Andrew over the years, and she doesn’t even know I know about it.
It was toward the end of our senior year at Berkley, and I needed some post-it notes. I was fresh out but as is the way of good friends and roommates, I knew I could borrow some from either Andrew or Avril. They weren’t home, but we were freely allowed to borrow stuff from each other. Andrew’s room was closest to mine, but he didn’t have any.
Avril’s room was neat and orderly, without anything out on her desk. I started rummaging through her drawers. In the last one I found a stack of post-its. I also found a folder that had the name “Lyndon Hawthorne” written on the tab.
My father’s name.
I couldn’t help myself. I pulled it out and opened it up, stunned to see several pages of notes all in Avril’s handwriting. She had apparently tracked my father down at some point after he left and had his whereabouts, including an address and a phone number. She also had a sheet of paper entitled “Pros and Cons” and it looked like a list she wrote out debating whether or not to turn this information over to me.
Some of the pros were things like “will help him heal” and “he can have a family one day”. Those fucking words made my nose sting as I realized she was keenly aware of my walls caused by my father when he abandoned me.
The cons were things like “maybe it’s too late” and “he didn’t ask me to nose around in his business”.
At the bottom of that sheet was a line that read: “Conclusion: I don’t know what to do.”
I flipped through more of the documents, which included a criminal record check on my father showing he’d spent some time in prison for drugs, as well as notes from phone calls she’d made to people to check him out. It looked like he did home inspections or some shit like that, and she had pretended to call for references from people he’d done work for. I remember they were all good things like “dependable” and “on time” and “good quality work for good price”.
I must have sat at her desk, reading over everything three, maybe four, times to soak it all in. I wasn’t pissed she’d done it, but rather amazed she would think to. When she pushed him out of the apartment, I didn’t give him another thought, but she had.
Avril had ultimately decided not to tell me. From what I could make of her notes, she had done all that research within the first few weeks after his visit. She’d held onto that information for months, apparently having decided not to share it with me.
It was that knowledge that made me realize I loved her for the first time. It had become clear that the bonds of our friendship were forged in steel, and that Avril cared about my entire well-being.
I never told her I found the information. I put it back in her desk, borrowed the post-its, and went on with my life.
I have no clue if she still has it, but for the first time in years, I wonder if perhaps it was foreshadowing the very circumstances I find myself in. There’s something deep within me that wants more from Avril than what we’ve discussed. It’s at war with my need to avoid relationships, yet I find myself now thinking about that damn folder with information about my father.
Completely wondering if maybe now is the time in my life where I’m supposed to confront that shit.
CHAPTER 17
Avril
My doorbell rings, and I walk—uncomfortably—to the front door. When I pull it open, Dane and Andrew stand there. Dane has a bouquet of flowers, and Andrew has a half-gallon of ice cream.
“Okay, that’s just awkward,” I tell the men as I eyeball their gifts. I turn and walk back into my house, knowing they’ll follow. “This isn’t a date.”
Dane grins, and Andrew snickers before saying, “No more awkward than the way you’re walking right now.”
I twist my neck to glare at him. “Yeah, well… you have a huge ass plug in you and see how you’re walking.”
“Poor baby,” Dane croons as he closes the door, but he doesn’t sound sympathetic at all.
The jackass wouldn’t either, since I’m quite sure this whole ‘make Avril as uncomfortable as possible while anticipating tonight’ idea was his.
Our workday had started off regularly enough. I made it to the office first, followed by Andrew and then Dane. You’d never have known by the casual way we greeted each other that the three of us had been fucking all night at The Wicked Horse. In fact, I’ve been with either Dane or Dane and Drew together every night since my evening alone with Andrew, and it only gets more exciting as every day passes.
The only thing that’s a little weird is that Andrew bugged out one night so it was just Dane and me together, and it was amazing. He and I played with the dildo machine at the club, and then he came back to my house and stayed the night.
Although today started normal, it didn’t stay that way. That’s because at about three o’clock this afternoon, Dane and Andrew showed up at my office door and closed it behind them. For a moment, I thought we had some very confidential business to discuss.
That was dispelled when Dane pulled out a butt plug, held it up, and said, “Take your panties off.”
My response. “Oh, hell no.”
“Tonight’s the night, Avril,” he said in a smooth, low voice that caused my pussy to tingle from the promise in it. I knew what he meant by the plug in his hand—that tonight I was going to have both of them in me at the same time. I’d asked about it, and I was promised it would be done right.
“We’re starting your prep a little early,” Andrew said, and the wicked look on his normally wholesome-looking face made my legs shake.
So. I ended up bent over my desk with my skirt hiked up, my panties pulled down, and Andrew’s fingers playing with my clit until I orgasmed. Dane pushed the lubed plug in my ass at that moment, and I thought I was going to die.
“Don’t take it out,” he’d warned me, and I had to admit… it felt good. It wasn’t overly large and it was so dirty that I was wearing it to a four o’clock meeting. The knowing looks Andrew and Dane kept shooting me made my panties wet, and it was difficult to concentrate.
Things got a little more uncomfortable when Dane showed back up at my office door at five o’clock. He gave me no choice but to assume the position over my desk while he fingered me to an orgasm. As the first tremors started, he pulled the plug out of me. I had to bite on the palm of my hand to stop from screaming.
He wasn’t done, however.
He merely replaced that plug with a larger one, and as I groaned out my discomfort when I stood back up, he merely gave me a quick kiss on the mouth and whispered, “You need this so you can handle my cock in your ass tonight.”