“Why does everyone look at me like that?”
“Maybe they’re scared of you.”
As the line of inmates waiting at the commissary parted at our approach, I started to realize it wasn’t only me they found frightening. “I don’t think it’s just me.” Everyone we passed either avoided our gaze or blatantly ogled. “What did you do to get this assignment?” I whispered. “I can’t imagine working undercover in a prison is a highly coveted position in the SIA.”
We rounded the staircase and Talon picked up his pace. I hurried to catch up with him as he trudged down the steps to the tunnels. When I was fairly certain he wasn’t going to answer, he stopped and spun around. “I had previous experience inside a supernatural penitentiary.” He turned on his heel and disappeared into the tunnels without another word.
No way strait-laced Talon was in jail, right? “Wait up!” I called out as I jogged to keep up. “You were like imprisoned?”
He dipped his head, keeping his eyes straight ahead.
“What did you do?”
“That’s a story for another time, Azara.”
“It’s not fair. You won’t tell me anything. All the other guys have been more than helpful in piecing together my past, but you? You won’t give me anything.”
He stopped marching and clenched his jaw. “You never knew in the first place, and it has nothing to do with you. It won’t help you get your memories back, it won’t bring back the past. It has no bearing whatsoever.”
I crossed my arms against my chest and glared up at the stubborn dragon. “It’ll help me know you.”
Talon’s shoulders slumped, the puff of his chest deflating. He began to walk slowly, and I trailed a few steps behind. “I’ve never told anyone—not even Vander.” His voice was so soft I could barely make it out through the cavernous passageway.
I lengthened my stride to walk beside him, but he didn’t say anything else. Not for another long minute.
“I don’t know how much Vander told you, but his parents raised me.”
I nodded. His werewolf brother had filled me in on how they’d grown up together.
“Anyway, when his dad died, it was like losing mine all over again. I did a lot of stupid shit. One time I went too far and lots of people died as a result.”
“What happened?” I couldn’t help it from popping out of my mouth.
“I’d been learning to control my dragon and let’s just say I let his anger get the best of me. I set fire to an entire village in the mountains of Draeko. I didn’t even know people lived up there.” He drew in a slow breath. “I was out on a joy-ride, roasting everything in my path. The smoke was so thick I completely missed the small houses. When you first arrived to Darkblood, you were so upset about killing a few dozen Fae. I killed nearly a hundred of my own dragons—women, children, everyone.”
A streak of pain raced across my chest at the devastation in Talon’s voice. “I’m sorry.” I squeezed my eyes shut and terrified faces and agonizing screams ripped across my mind’s eye. Flippin’ faeries, was that a memory? I tried to hold onto the terrifying images, but they slipped away as quickly as they’d appeared.
“Not as sorry as I am.” His gravelly voice drew me from my own dark thoughts.
“But it was a mistake, Talon. You didn’t take those lives on purpose.”
“No, but it was my fault, and their memory will haunt me for the rest of my life.”
We lapsed into a heavy silence after that. I wanted to say something, to comfort him, but nothing seemed right. I cursed myself and my lost emotions.
The soft pitter-patter of our footsteps filled the stillness as we traversed the tunnels to the mountaintop. I’d been back at Darkblood for nearly a week and still the memory of the frigid trek through the mountains brought on a rush of icy chills.
Ahead, brilliant light filled an archway. I squinted from the sweeping white after the dim tunnels. A wave of cool air wafted over me as I followed Talon to the mountainous exit. “How exactly are we getting to the Underworld?”
Talon turned, blocking the doorway and some of the frosty blasts of wind. “I figured we’d give your portalling powers a try, and if that doesn’t work, we’ll fly.”
I gulped as I peeked over his shoulder at the soaring mountain range and treacherous crags. I still couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that I was a warlock, but I sure as hell hoped it was true. Portalling seemed much easier than flying by dragon across this frigid wasteland.
“You seemed to enjoy it last time.”
“Huh?” I tore my anxious gaze from the bottomless snow-covered valley below.
“Flying. You’ve ridden my dragon before.”
And I’d love to ride him again. My lusty she-demon perked up. It was the first I’d heard from her since we left the confines of the fortress and the magic binding wards behind.
He cleared his throat and ran his palm over the back of his neck as if he’d heard my naughty thoughts. “It’s completely safe is what I’m getting at.”
“Gotcha.” I pulled my collar up as the wind whipped by and wrapped my arms tighter around the warm jacket. “I guess I should give this a try before I freeze to death.”
He nodded. “Your powers are fueled by emotions. Once you get a handle on those, you’ll easily be able to rein in your abilities.”
Great, my emotions. What if they were exactly the problem?
My mind flashed back to my escape from Thax’s underground castle. How had I opened that portal? I’d been thinking about Talon… and Draeko, and the prison. I was frustrated and getting desperate. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to harness those emotions again. Turning my thoughts inward, I searched for that swirl of magic that resided deep within my core.
Nothing but an empty void.
Dammit. I blew out a frustrated breath.
Warm hands closed around my shoulders, and my eyes snapped open. A pair of glimmering silver irises locked on mine. “You have to feel it, Azara. Don’t force it. Your magic will come back when the time is right.”
My jaw unclenched, and I focused on the mesmerizing pools of molten steel. I wanted to disappear inside them and never return. Why couldn’t I remember Talon? Those eyes spoke to me like they had a direct link to my tortured soul.
Chasing the frustrating thoughts away, I concentrated on my powers. My she-demon skimmed the surface of my skin, but I kept her at bay. I needed my inner warlock today. Talon and Logan refused to let me start practicing magic until I got my demon under control, so I’d have to wing it.
From the corner of my eye, I glanced at the purple tattoo on my arm. Not even a flicker. Apparently, my warlock was in hiding. “It’s no use. I can’t do it,” I grumbled, breaking free of his smoldering gaze.
He snagged my chin between his thumb and forefinger and lifted my eyes back to his. “It’ll come when the time is right. Just like your memories.”
“When did you get all Zen master on me?” I narrowed my eyes. “Where’d the pissed-off dragon I met go?”
Talon shrugged and turned his gaze over the mountainside. “Maybe my dragon realized all hope wasn’t lost.”
“Stupid dragon,” I muttered, earning an elusive chuckle from Talon.