Stepping under the water, I let the scalding temperature burn away my shame. Then, I washed from head to toe until the only hint of earth and rain that remained was in my mouth. Even that didn’t linger after a good brushing.
Calmer, I wiped the steam from the glass and looked at myself again. Normal body. Normal eyes. I breathed a sigh of relief and opened the door.
Adira stood by the window. My anger quickly flared back to life.
“I’m in no mood for your subtle threats and manipulations, Adira. Save them for another time and leave.”
Fist curled around the edge of the towel I’d wrapped around my torso, I turned and stalked into my closet for clean clothes.
“I didn’t believe your mother and needed to see for myself. Will you tell me how you managed to coerce a dryad? They’re very reclusive creatures.”
Seething, I ripped open drawers and grabbed clothes at random. Threads snapped in the seams as I yanked the pieces on. Why did she always need to be right there, constantly involved in everything? She’d at least had the sense not to follow me into the closet. Given my current mood, I might have tried killing her with a hanger.
Once I was dressed, I stalked out of the closet.
“Are you going to answer me?” she asked.
“No.”
I grabbed the coat I’d tossed on the bed and headed for the door.
“Where are you going?”
“Use your stupid tracking spell to find out. Isn’t that what it’s for?”
I left the room, slamming the door again. The satisfaction I felt shriveled as I walked away. My display of temper would do nothing but provoke Adira and the Council. Yet, Fenris said not to play their games their way. Where exactly did that leave me?
I jogged down the stairs and made my way to the kitchen. Mrs. Quill was still there. She quietly watched me drape the coat over one of the seats at the island.
“Oanen’s coat is dirty, but I didn’t want to throw it in with the regular laundry.”
“That’s fine. You can leave it with me, and I’ll have it cleaned.” She studied my black eyes, and I saw the hesitancy in her own.
“Thank you.” I started to turn away, but her next words stopped me.
“It’s tearing me apart to see you so unhappy. Please, Eliana. Talk to me. You used to tell me everything.”
“Hardly,” I said. “Even before the Council manipulated my mother’s presence here, I knew that what I said was never just for your ears.”
“I only ever repeated what was necessary to help you.”
I looked over my shoulder at her.
“I never asked for help. What I needed was someone who understood me. But no one here is interested in taking the time to do that.” Her eyes started to water. “I’ll be home after dark.”
Pretending to be unaffected by Mrs. Quill’s tears and walking away wasn’t easy. I’d hurt her. But more than that, I’d hurt myself by openly acknowledging the truth. I’d wanted her to be there for me, and she hadn’t been. My mom, for all of her peculiarities, was the only one actually trying to understand now. That was more than anyone else had ever done.
My anger left me as I started the car and backed out of the garage.
I was a succubus. I should have people vying to spend time in my presence. Instead, I lacked a single friend or confidant.
With tears gathering in my eyes, I thought of Megan and stopped at the end of the driveway to call her.
“Hey, Eliana. I was going to give you until tonight before I started sending broken heart memes.”
I gave a watery laugh.
“You still can.”
“What’s wrong? Are you crying?”
“Maybe a little. Everyone is just making me so angry, and I’m lonely without a friend.”
“We can be home in five minutes,” she said immediately. “This hell gate thing I do is amazing for travel.”
“Not so good on the luggage,” Oanen called from the background.
“No, there’s no need for you to come home yet. Mrs. Quill said you were in Cyprus. Is it pretty?”
“It is. I never thought I was the type to ooh and aah over old stuff, but seeing some of the ruins is pretty humbling. I texted a pic to my great-grandma, and guess what she said? She remembers them a lot differently. She’s five hundred years old. Can you believe that shit?”
I chuckled at the awe in her tone.
“I can. There are older creatures alive. You might like talking to a few of them.”
“Probably not. I can only imagine the wrongs they’ve committed over all those years.”
“Yeah. I didn’t think of that.”
There was a long, silent pause.
“Are you going to tell me who I have to threaten for making you cry when I get home?”
“It’s a list. My mom brought my dad here. I love him, but I hate seeing how he is around her. Mindlessly happy, and a shell of the man he used to be before he met her.”
“How do you know? I mean, you weren’t born yet. How do you know he’s only a shell?”
I frowned at the phone.
“Megan, this is my pity party. Stop trying to be reasonable.”
She laughed.
“Carry on then. Who else?”
“Piepen has a new girlfriend who is insanely jealous. She sent her little sister to check me out. I’m tired of waking up to brownies in my room. I know I’m locking my window at night, but the little flitters keep getting in.”
“Was she touching herself?”
“What? Eew. No.”
“Well, that’s a win.”
“Your logic isn’t welcome here.”
She laughed again, and I grinned.
“But what’s really getting me is that Adira has a tracking spell on me now because I disappeared on them for a few hours.”
“Oh? Tell me more about this disappearance. Where did you go? Who were you with?”
“You’re missing the point. Adira is driving me insane with her control issues.”
“I promise to punch her in the face when I get back. Now, tell me the details.”
I thought of the caves and who I’d been with the first time and felt a pang of regret.
“Just some hot springs. Oanen can probably tell you more about them than I can. I miss you, Megan. It’s just not the same with you gone.”
“You’re making it really hard to stay away when you say things like that.”
“Sorry.”
“Don’t be. Keep calling me when you’re lonely. Or go hang out with Ashlyn. I know she likes you and isn’t afraid of all of us monsters.”
Guilt hit me like a punch to the middle.
“And there’s always Fenris,” Megan continued, unaware of my pain. “Tell him to give you a hug for me.”
“No way. He’s far too huggy already. Whatever you do, don’t bet hugs with him. I’m up to two a day.”
Her squeal, followed by a burst of laughter, had me jerking the phone from my ear.
“Yeah, real funny,” I said, shouting to be heard. “Just so you know, he’s planning on hugging you and Oanen when you guys are back. Be ready.”
“Oh, we will be. In the meantime, is there anything I can do to make your life easier with Adira? I don’t think tracking spells are breaking any rules, so my fury probably won’t care, but anything else?”