"Loran Orran sends his greetings." The messenger's voice echoed around the empty corners of my great hall. It was quite nice to have the place so empty, it was usually a bustling hive of activity and light and noise. There's a lot to be said for meetings in the middle of the night. "I assume I am addressing Eskara Helsene, the Corpse Queen?" He had a well-trained voice, also musical. It reminded me of the bard I had met in that tavern, and the night we had spent together.
Sirileth stirred and I shifted her beneath the shadow draped around me. That, too, is another thing made more difficult by missing an arm.
"Where is he?" I put as much menace into my voice as I could. I will not lie; I had been looking for the Iron Legion. Not just for my own vengeance, and not just for that of Ssserakis'. I had not forgotten about Josef. I could not forget, would not forget.
The messenger caught the tone I used and when he stood, he looked far less confident than before. "I don't know. I was paid to bring a message for the Corpse Queen's ears only. I should mention, I don't understand the content only…"
My patience with the man wore thin and I snapped at him. "Then tell me the message and get out." Sirileth let out a sharp wail, not muffled at all by my shadow.
The messenger coughed. "Yenhelm lives. You can find him where it all began. Wait too long, and I will come for you." He bowed and turned.
"That's it?" Hardt asked, stepping out from the shadow of a nearby pillar.
The messenger nodded and I let him leave. I was a little preoccupied trying to quiet Sirileth once more.
It's time, Eskara.
"Where it all began?" Hardt asked. "The Pit?" The Pit was flooded beneath our feet. There were things living down there, still. Things that could call the deep, dark water home, but no terrans could.
"Not all beginnings are yours," Tamura said. "Go back further and you will see a million beginnings all intersecting."
Hardt sighed. "You could have just said no."
I was busy cooing to Sirileth and rocking her back and forth in a vain attempt to quiet her. "It began in Picarr, the laboratory beneath the Academy of Magic. That's where he experimented on Josef and I."
The ruins of Picarr were not close. Weeks away at least, especially as I would not risk portal travel over significant distances. It was not for myself that I feared to use portals, but for Ssserakis. Whatever lived on the other side, had taken an interest in my horror, and I would not give it another chance to pick Ssserakis apart.
It's a trap.
"This has to be a trap." Hardt agreed with my horror without even realising it. "Why else would he just tell you where to find him?"
I nodded, still dealing with a wriggling baby. Sirileth was never one for sitting still. I had not known my first daughter long, but Kento had been a quiet babe, calm but for the times she needed something. Sirileth could not have been more different, always moving, always noisy. They were, both of them, perfect, my daughters.
"You're going, aren't you?" Hardt asked.
Again, I nodded. "The Iron Legion knows where I am, and for some reason he wants me to meet him." I sighed. "The fucker isn't going to just accept it if I don't go. There was a threat implied in that message as well as an invitation. What we've built here can be torn down. You saw the powers he can bring to bear. I won't risk it. And I won't risk her."
He must be killed. No one from your world should be strong enough to pull a lord of Sevoari across. There are things in my world that must remain there.
I shrugged. "And he has Josef." Hardt opened his mouth to speak, but I cut him off. "I have left Josef to die twice now, Hardt. Once down in the Pit, and again when he was first taken. I have a chance to set him free. I know you don't… I know what he did." I shook my head. "We've all done regrettable things. I'm going. I'm going to bring Josef back!"
That was the end of the discussion, at least as far as I was concerned. I think Hardt realised it too. He certainly didn't make any sort of move to stop me. Far from it, in fact. He insisted on going with me, even when I tried to leave without him.
I had a maid. Apparently, it's quite normal for women in positions of power to have maids for their children. Mine was a terran woman by the name of Galea who looked as though she could have eaten me and had room for dessert. But she was good with my daughter and damned useful. I let Galea take Sirileth from me and place her in the little wooden cot Hardt had made. She wriggled for a bit, trying to find comfort in the mound of blankets and missing the warmth of her mother. My will almost faltered then, watching my daughter pull faces in discomfort. I had to wipe the tears from my eyes and take a shuddering breath before I could speak.
"People will say things about me. Stories." I sniffed and reached down, pulling a blanket a little closer around her tiny flailing form. Sirileth was a small babe, only now reaching the same size her older sister had been at birth. "Some of them may be true. Probably most of them. Never let them tell you I didn't love you. I do. With everything that makes me, I do.
"Listen to Imiko. She's a fucking bitch at times, but she means well. Tamura, too. Crazier than a barrel of eels but there's no one better for advice, if you can decipher it. Hardt will protect you, even when you don't want him to. Don't let his size fool you, he's not really scary at all." Another ragged breath escaped me. My daughter starred up at me with those darklight eyes, her mouth moving in silent incomprehensible words.
"Don't let anyone tell you what you can't do. Challenge them. Break the rules." My breath caught in my throat.
Never let your own fear rule you. Use the fear of others to rule them.
I smiled despite myself. "Never be ruled by your fears. But don't ignore them either. A little fear can be healthy."
And filling.
I drew in another shuddering breath and stood, staring down at my daughter. "Be great!" We have that hope for our children. That they will be better than us, stronger than us, more successful and wiser. We all wish our children will one day step out from the shadows of their parents and cast their own brilliant light upon the world. Well, Sirileth certainly did that. She cast her own brilliant darklight upon the world, and in that light Ovaeris burned. But again, I'm getting ahead of myself.
"Sounds like you're saying goodbye." Imiko, ever one to enter a room in silence. I think she just liked to surprise people. There was steel in her voice these days. She had found that in my absence.
"I am."
"Not coming back?"
"I'll try." There were words left unsaid. I knew I had little chance of surviving a conflict with the Iron Legion, even less so given it was clearly a trap. But there was more, something I had to do even if I somehow emerged victorious. Something I was hiding from everyone, even Ssserakis.
I turned to face my little sister only to find her towering over me, her jaw clenched. "Last time you left me with a kingdom to look after and only an old, mad fool for company. Now you're leaving me with a baby as well?"
"Look after her. Please." No words I could have said would be sufficient. "Look after everyone."
Imiko sniffed, blinked away some tears. "Sometimes I wish I'd never stolen that bloody Source from you."