The morning came and in the harsh light of day, Julian said nothing of the wounds on his back and thighs. He shaved and dressed in silence, ignoring Niko’s lingering glances. Julian hid the pain well, well enough that Niko thought he often had to withstand such wounds.
“I need to see more of Amir,” Niko said.
“Agreed. But first”—the man’s easy smile lit up the room like sunshine, and after the horror of the previous night Niko’s heart flip-flopped to see it—“breakfast.”
Julian had a spring in his step that belied how he must have ached. They walked to a pleasant orangery in the eastern wing of the palace, where a breakfast had been set on a small table, apparently for Julian, as there were no others present.
“Sit.” Julian urged, pulling out a seat for Niko before taking his own.
“This is nice.”
Julian piled his plate high with pancakes and syrup and fruit. “Courtesy of Vasili. Enjoy it while it lasts.” His pallor was a little milky, but otherwise, his eyes had brightened. In fact, he seemed more alert now than he did last night. Relief that he’d survived the whip and that it hadn’t been worse? He almost behaved like a man set free of his bonds.
Niko loaded his plate and ate with gusto. The rations he’d been given as a doulos were meager and bland. The fruits here were juicy and plump and sweet, and so fucking delicious Niko returned for a second plate, asking, “Does he always feed you so well after whipping you?”
Julian stopped chewing and reached for the wine, used a mouthful to wash down his food. “Listen.” The light in his eyes and smile faded some. “Don’t tell him you saw me like that.”
Niko folded his arms across his chest. “He doesn’t care what I think.”
“No, but I do. It’s…”
“Complicated?”
“Yes.”
“I’m not sure I can stay quiet. You were—”
“This isn’t about you, Niko.” Julian’s tone hardened. “Pretend you didn’t see a damn thing and enjoy the food. I have a day off, and I’d…I’d like to show you some more of the palace…to fill in your maps.”
Niko wet his lips and unfolded his arms, startled by the request and somewhat adrift considering how Julian was looking at him. He wanted to reach out and cover the gloved hand, maybe squeeze it softly, offering the same kind of comfort Julian had appeared to need last night. But something had changed, and in the daylight, that brief moment when he’d folded Julian into his arms seemed like a dream.
“All right,” Niko agreed, professionally detached. “You can show me the parts of the palace I can’t access alone.”
Julian popped a grape in his mouth, crunched down, and grinned.
Niko wasn’t sure what he’d expected of the day, but it hadn’t been a grand tour of the palace’s walled gardens, or the vast tropical orangeries full of strange, vibrant flowers from lands Niko had never heard of.
Julian relaxed more with every new room or sight they saw. The tension he’d always carried had all but vanished, turning him into a different man from Vasili’s stiff guard. He showed Niko the stables and the enormous prancing horses that looked as vicious and wild as the princes they served.
The day came to a close on a grassy hill on the western side of the palace grounds, where the gardens were left to bloom of their own accord, full of wild flowers and sprawling grasses.
Niko had mapped the palace in his mind as much as possible and made a note of how many people came and went through the grounds. Considering the prince feared for his life, the palace was remarkably open.
Julian sat on a grassy bank with his knees drawn up, propping his wrists on them. “You can see the ocean from here.”
Niko sat in the grass beside him and shielded his eyes from the setting sun. The glistening silver strip of ocean in the distance looked like the edge of a sword. “So you can.”
“Have you ever seen it up close?”
“No. Mah’s service to the manor and Pah’s forge kept us close to Trenlake.”
“You miss them?”
Astute of him. He hadn’t realized he did, until now. “Yes. I do. I’ve almost forgotten their faces. Forgotten a lot of life before. The war makes things appear different, like those days happened to someone else.” He stopped there, reining in the urge to tell Julian everything.
Julian sighed and leaned back on his elbows to watch the sunset-stained clouds. “Thank you.”
“What for?”
“Being here.”
Niko glanced down at the man, then promptly away to stare at how the palace grounds fell away beneath them, ending in a smooth white wall to keep the general Loreen population out. The glance had been quick, but enough to see how Julian’s shirt had ridden up, revealing a hint of golden skin. Niko instantly imagined biting that tease of skin on his waist. He promptly wished he hadn’t when lust heated his cock, making it stiffen uncomfortably. A good thing he was faced slightly away. By the three gods, he usually had more control than this.
The day had been marvelous. And strange. Seeing Julian out of his role was an unexpected delight. He laughed freely and often, making Niko fall into laughing with him. The day had done nothing to temper the urges Niko was experiencing. If anything, it had made them worse.
Julian continued. “And for not asking about what you saw last night.”
“You made it clear it’s none of my business.”
“I…” He trailed off.
Niko looked back.
Julian twisted a sprig of grass between his fingers. He pinched his bottom lip between his teeth and let it spring free. What would it feel like to kiss him right now, Niko wondered, the both of them basking in the sun, alone, where the world couldn’t reach them? Would he be soft or hard? Fast or slow? All of those things perhaps until Julian shoved him off and reported him to Vasili. The prince would probably take great joy in severing Niko’s dick.
Yes, thinking of Vasili certainly dampened the desire to crawl up Julian’s body, to press him into the grass, to make him murmur Niko’s name between breaths. Dammit. Niko stood abruptly and stared at the city, keeping Julian behind him. “We should get back before your prince notices I’ve stolen you away all day.”
“He’s your prince too.”
“No, Vasili is nothing to me.”
“He—” Julian cut himself off.
Niko turned, his shadow falling over Julian, making his eyes widen. His pupils dilated. “Go on, finish what you were going to say.”
“He had no hand in his father’s actions,” Julian said. “He no more wanted to surrender than you did.”
“No? He’s regent now, so why doesn’t he fight back?”
“You know why. Our forces are scattered, exhausted, and broken. The peace is our last hope. If the kingdom rises up again, the elves will burn it all down.”
Niko snorted. They’d burn it all down eventually anyway. “That was Talos’s doing. We were winning. His surrender devastated morale. I tried to keep the ranks together but what was the point? Two friends took blades to their own throats rather than return in shame.”
“I’m... sorry.”