I don’t know what it says about me that I crave it. I am actively looking forward to the next time Grace tries to slip away from me, to tracking her down and bringing her back, to the battle that will undoubtably play out in my bed.
“I’ll gut you before I let that happen.”
“Promises, promises.” Though I get a perverse amount of enjoyment out of verbally sparring with this woman, I take a slow step back and lower my wings. Whether I’m enjoying it or not, we can’t exist in a state of constant battle. The longer we bicker, the greater the chance of her storming off. I’m not ready to be alone again. “Are you hungry?”
She opens her mouth as if caught in the momentum of the argument but pauses when she seems to process what I just asked her. “I could eat.”
“Let’s see what Silas has put together for breakfast.” I pivot and offer her my arm. I’m quietly pleased when she gives me a sharp look but slips her hand into the crook of my elbow. “The formal dining room is mostly for show. Unless you prefer it, I usually take my breakfasts and lunches in the kitchen.”
“Meals in the kitchen sounds like more my speed.” Grace very carefully doesn’t look at me. “I’m not one to stand on ceremony, and the dining room table is way too formal for my tastes.”
We pivoted so quickly, I don’t know what to think. Maybe it’s as simple as her not wanting to be alone any more than I do. I guide us through the echoing halls until we reach the kitchen. I thought I heard Silas cooking, but when we walk through the door, the room is empty.
There are two plates sitting on the kitchen counter. Waiting for us.
Grace eyes them with understandable distress. “Is this castle manned by ghosts?”
“Ghosts aren’t real.”
“Actually, they are.” She has a strange look on her face. There’s a flicker of white in her energy before she locks it down. Grief. “They’re hellishly difficult to deal with. Salt is pretty much the only thing that works, and it’s a temporary measure.”
Again, I’m struck by the fact that this is no ordinary human. I may not have had interactions with more than a handful over the years, but Grace stands apart. I pull out her chair and wait for her to take a seat before I do the same. I know the proper thing to do in this situation. I should keep up the casual, safe small talk and allow Grace to get more comfortable with me. It feels like a lie.
Maybe that’s why I say what I’m really thinking. “How is it that you came to be in contact with vampires? I was under the impression that they don’t mingle with humans overmuch.”
Grace takes a bite and chews slowly. “They don’t. But my family has a, ah, special relationship with paranormals. We’ve been aware of them for as long as they’ve existed in our realm.”
She’s not saying anything I didn’t already suspect, but I can’t help pressing. “And you help them?”
“Sometimes.” Grace pokes at her food. “Usually humans are the ones in desperate need of help, but there are exceptions to every rule.”
If she doesn’t know the various quirks and secrets that come with being a gargoyle, it’s probably in my best interest not to educate her. It takes a lot of practice to hide emotions from people who can read them in the very air around you, but it can be done. With such a complicated human who is so prone to lies, I need every advantage I can get.
But hiding things feels too much like a lie in and of itself.
“I can read your energy. All gargoyles, all those with gargoyles in their family history, can. Each color has a different meaning, an emotion attached to it. You’re not desperate. You haven’t been desperate for a moment since I met you.” The closest she got was when she was tangled in that web with the spiders closing in, but even that wasn’t true desperation.
Grace twists to face me and frowns. “For a king or leader or whatever the terminology is, you’re absolute garbage at keeping secrets. Don’t you know that you should hold every possible resource close? If I didn’t know you could read my emotions, that would be an incredible weapon in your arsenal. And you just gave it away for nothing.”
She is . . . angry? No, that’s not quite right. She doesn’t seem to know how to feel any more than I do. Her emotions flicker and swirl in a confusing maelstrom of colors. I look away to avoid getting dizzy. “That kind of thought process should only be used against enemies.”
“That’s naive and you know it. There’s no way the gargoyles and the other people who inhabit this realm are that much different than humans. All I have to do is pick up a history book to see that allies can become enemies all too quickly when power is on the line.”
She’s right, but I still don’t understand why she’s so worked up over this. “That should be a relief to you. Maybe one of them will make a move soon and kill me, which will break the contract and send you back to the bargainer demon territory. That’s what you want, isn’t it?”
“Yes.” The way she says it is almost a lie. Her energy doesn’t quite change, but she won’t meet my gaze, and she turns away. “Of course that’s what I want.”
I push my food away, no longer hungry. “Why are you here, Grace?” She opens her mouth to answer, but I press on before she can get any words out. “Not here in this castle. Not here with me. Here in the demon realm. What did Ramanu mean when they said Azazel has answers about your mother?”
“I told you already. I’m paying the price of someone else’s deal.”
The bullshit might’ve worked with me before, but it doesn’t make sense with the things I know now. I shake my head sharply. “Don’t you think I deserve to know the truth? I’ve given you the courtesy of being honest. Can’t you do the same?” Even as I say it, I’m not sure I believe myself. Ultimately, she doesn’t owe me anything. We might be in this together, but it’s a temporary situation.
Grace uses her fork to move her food around her plate. Finally she sighs. “Okay, you might have a point. My mother is dead, and has been for some time, I think. It’s been five years in the human realm, but time moves differently. Azazel is the only one who has the full story of what happened, and I want to know. I need to know.”
“Why would Azazel have answers about your mother—” I realize the answer before I even finish speaking. Her mother made a demon deal and then never came home. And now Grace has moved across realms to get the answers she craves. Would I do any less if there were questions about how my family had died and I was the last one left? No wonder she is so determined to leave my side and make her way back to the bargainer demon territory.
If I were a better man, I would release her from the fucked-up bargain we put in place between us. If I were a worse one, I would use this knowledge to ensure her compliance with my needs and demands.
I do neither. Instead, I find myself studying her. “Would you like to see more of the lands around the castle? I’d like to get out of here for a bit and I wouldn’t say no to some company.”
She lifts her brows. “Playing hooky? Surely someone will come looking.”
“These days the castle mostly runs itself and my company is hardly entertaining enough for most people to seek out.”