“Can I pretend that I’m happy that you’ll be spending day and night with your ex?”
“No, it’s not like that.” I shook my head. “It’s business. I’m hanging with Davey, Drew, Ethan, and the roadies, but I won’t be spending personal time with Trent.”
“Right, Nik.”
“I’m serious. I love you, only you. And besides, Trent will be too busy with his skanks to be thinking about me.”
“Jealous?” His brown eyes glinted.
“Are you kidding me?”
He shrugged. “I just don’t have a good feeling about this, Nik. I feel like . . .” He sighed, taking a few steps back. “I feel like I’m losing you.”
“Never,” I harshly whispered above the lump in my throat. “Don’t you trust me? I’d never, ever cheat on you.” I stepped closer. “You’ve gotta know that.”
“I do. I trust you. But sometimes with the band, you don’t make the best decisions.”
I snapped my head back. “That’s not fair. The last time I was in the band was ten years ago.”
“And you were wild, crazy. I loved that about you, but now. . . now things are different. We have a family. We can’t just go barhopping all weekend. We can’t break into someone’s lake house and go skinny-dipping at midnight or smoke weed for a Sunday Funday.”
I grimaced, remembering the cookies I’d taken to girls’ night. Whatever. Weed didn’t have an age expiration date.
“And why can’t we? Just because we have children doesn’t mean we can’t have fun. Sure, we have to be responsible, and we can’t act willy-nilly, but we can plan fun trips with just us or with our friends. We have your parents and my mama—they adore our kids.”
James stared at me for a moment and then sighed. “Come here, Nik.” He opened his arms. “I love you, baby. Just promise me you’ll be safe. Be smart.”
“I promise,” I whispered into his chest, tears pressing against my eyelids. “I’ll call you and the kids every day. I’ve got to teach Bria the rest of the song. I’ll be back for the talent show.”
“Okay.” He squeezed me tighter. The python squeeze across my chest that had plagued me for the past few months loosened. We were finally breaking through the icy fortress that had surrounded our marriage. I stepped back, taking him in. Fear and love swirled in his honey-brown eyes. We stared at each other, nothing else said, but I knew that he loved me and I loved him. We had a beautiful family, and maybe he wasn’t convinced at the moment, but we could have it all.
Another rude honk from the bus interrupted our moment.
James rolled his eyes and shook his head. “Let me walk you to the front of the bus.” He grabbed my hand. I gave him a shy smile, that old yet familiar feeling of excitement and uncertainty filling my chest.
On the way to the front, I caught a glimpse of Trent making kissy faces in the window. James gripped my hand tighter. Arriving at the door, we walked onto the bus, pausing near the driver’s seat.
I needed to make a statement to James, to Trent. I was a married woman, this was business, and I was following my dreams. No silly-ass feelings of jealousy or slutty exes would get in my way. “Kiss me,” I demanded.
His lips, strong and soft at the same time, pressed into mine. Good gracious, this man made a move on my heart.
After he kissed the soul out of my body, he wrenched himself away. It felt as if I were carving out a piece of my heart.
James cleared his throat and walked me to my seat. “Davey!” he yelled over my head. “Take care of my girl.”
Drumsticks in hand, Davey stopped mid-twirl and saluted James. “Ten-four.”
“Masters.” James nodded to Trent, who was slumped over with his guitar in hand.
“Yeah?” Trent shook the shaggy blond bangs from his eyes, an amused expression on his face.
“Twenty-seven.”
Trent shrugged. “Is that supposed to mean something to me?”
“That’s the number of bones in your hand. Touch my girl and I’ll break all of them.”
Davey snorted and Drew full on laughed.
Drew leaned over his seat and patted Trent’s shoulder. “Dude. If I were you, I’d keep that guitar in your hands. That way you’ll be covered.”
“Fuck off,” he growled at Drew, but stared at James. “Can we leave now?”
I nodded and hugged James. “Kiss my babies again for me.”
“Goodbye, baby.” He walked backward, his eyes never leaving my face.
“Not forever. Just for now,” I whispered.
“Just for now,” he agreed. Finally, he turned and walked off the bus.
“Yippee ki-yay!” Trent whooped. “Time for Nikki Hardt to play.”
I shook my head and pushed the window down. I leaned out and yelled, “I fucking love you, James Grayson!”
James stopped in his tracks, turned around, and grinned. “And I fucking love you, Nikki Grayson.”
I winked and gave him a grin.
A little farther out, my mom, Bria, and JJ waved.
“Bye, babies! I love you. Be good!”
Bria rushed toward James’s open arms. “Bye, Mommy!” she yelled and then wiggled out of my hubby’s grip. The driver cranked the engine, and the bus leaped forward. Bria jogged beside the bus. “Love you, Mommy.”
“Love you to the moon and back, precious.”
“Forever and ever?”
“Forever and ever!” I waved and she waved until we couldn’t see each other anymore.
* * *
“We love you, Cleveland!” Trent shouted into the mic.
The crowd yelled their approval. Thank goodness the audio equipment cut through the screams. Tattered Souls had a strong following, more than I’d first thought. Davey had assured me it wasn’t always like this, but rather the viral sensation with adding me to the band.
“Did you guys enjoy our girl Nikki?”
Louder cheers and whoops exploded from the crowd. I raised my guitar and then took a bow. The crowd began to chant my name. The energy from the audience gave me a buzz on top of the one I had from my three vodka shots that I’m sure I sweated out during the concert.
The band and I did one last wave and the lights switched off, a signal to our fans that the show was over.
“We. Are. On. Fucking. Fire!” Trent grabbed my waist and twirled me around.
I laughed like a maniac, still high from the gig. “Put me down, Trent!”
“Fuck yeah!” Drew grabbed a bottle of water and sloshed it over his purple Mohawk.
Davey and Ethan brought up the rear and bumped arms with each other, the same shit they’d been doing since we first formed the band.
Trent lowered me to the ground with his hands on my ass.
A flare of anger hit my chest. “Watch it, Masters. My husband meant what he said about breaking your precious hands.” I speed-walked to the green room and pushed open the door. Trent was hot on my trail, and the rest of the band soon followed.
“Yeah, yeah. He’s so tough shuffling papers around for his rich clients.”
Davey snorted. “You didn’t say that shit when he was in front of you a month ago. Don’t get all brave now.” Davey squeezed my shoulders and walked to the bar. Drew and Ethan, who’d settled on the love seat in the room, kept quiet, as usual.