“Would you look at them?” Ali grumbles. “Bunch of cavemen.”
“He is right, though. You should sit down,” Carly tells her and she nods.
“God, I know. My feet are fucking killing me.”
Carly laughs and grabs her hand to guide her over to the couches and Tate and I follow behind them. Brooklyn starts to fuss as soon as I sit down and I pull the baggie of cereal out of my purse before handing it to her.
“Okay,” Ali breathes after she gets settled and her feet propped up. “Give it to me straight. How bad is labor?”
I laugh. “Um, bad… but the thing is, you forget how bad it was as soon as it’s over and you’re holding your baby in your arms. And when she takes her first step or says her first word, you’ll be desperate to have another one.”
“Well, that’s comforting, I guess.”
“Look at it this way… I would rather have another baby than get hit by a truck again.”
She laughs. “I suppose that makes sense.”
“That’s how you met Smith, right?” Carly asks and I nod.
“Yeah, I had just gotten off work and I was driving home when this truck came out of nowhere. And then Lucas was there, keeping me calm until the ambulance arrived.”
“That’s Smith, for ya,” Tate says and the other girls nod.
“So, you can totally tell me it’s none of my business if you want but is her dad in the picture?” Ali asks, pointing to Brooklyn and I shake my head.
“No, he’s not.”
“That must be so hard for you. I know as much shit as I give him, I’d be lost in the pregnancy without Logan.”
I shrug, smiling as I think about Grams. “I wasn’t all by myself. My Grams was a huge support for me until she died and I’ve got my little sister Alice.”
“It takes a village,” Ali muses before flashing me a smile. “And now you’ve got all of us. It’s easy to see that Lucas is head over heels for you, which means that you’ve just been added to this crazy family and we’d all do anything for each other.”
“That’s going to take some getting used to.”
Carly lets out a laugh as she nods. “Yes, it will but one day, you’ll look up and realize that it’s the biggest blessing.”
“That’s true,” Tate adds. “No family is perfect but what Blaze and the guys have built here comes pretty damn close.”
“I kind of got that feeling from Lucas.”
As soon as the words leave my mouth, Lucas strolls back into the room with Storm. Storm flashes a victorious grin at Ali when he finds her sitting down with her feet propped up and she rolls her eyes.
“God, he’s going to be impossible now.”
“Hey, Darlin’,” Lucas says, sinking into the seat next to me and I smile at him.
“Hey.”
Tate rolls her eyes and flashes Lucas a disgusted look. “God, the two of you are sickeningly cute.”
“You’re just jealous that you got stuck with that asshole outside,” Lucas teases her and she flips him off.
“Don’t think that just because it’s a baby shower, I didn’t bring my taser.”
I peek over at Lucas with wide eyes and he shakes his head.
“Behave. We have company.”
She rolls her eyes again before standing up and heading outside. The guys slowly start filtering in and out as they cook the food but Lucas stays by my side, talking to me and playing with Brooklyn.
“So, I have a question,” I prompt and he nods.
“Shoot.”
“The names - Kodiak, Storm, Moose… that’s not their real names, correct?”
He laughs and nods. “Right. Those are road names.”
“And why don’t you have a road name?”
“Uh,” he murmurs. “Smith is my road name, babe. My real last name is Julette but when I joined the club, I wanted to be anonymous, you know? I didn’t want my father’s sins following me around so Blaze called me Smith. But if anyone else asks, they think Smith is my real last name.”
“Why not tell them?”
He shrugs. “Because I guess in a way, I’ve become Smith. That’s the man I want to be and I’ve even looked into changing my name legally a few times.”
“But you haven’t?”
“I didn’t want Clay to feel like I was abandoning him.”
I offer him a soft smile as I cup his face in my hand. “Don’t ever think that you’re anything other than a damn good man, Lucas Smith.”
He leans in and presses his lips to mine as he runs his fingers through my hair. When he pulls away, he licks his lips and hums.
“I kinda wish we were at home right now.”
I nod, leaning in. “Me, too.”
Our lips meet again and he groans quietly as he grips the back of my neck.
“Smith!” someone yells and he jerks away from me, glancing over his shoulder as Kodiak waves him over. He sighs and kisses my forehead.
“Give me a second.”
I nod. “Sure.”
I watch him as he walks across the room and talks to Kodiak. Tate sinks into the seat across from me and I smile at her before turning back to look at him. A young man with dirty blond hair steps out of the back hallway and my stomach rolls as my entire body begins to shake. He glances in our direction and everything in me is screaming to run.
“Wh-Who is Lucas talking to?” I whisper, barely able to force the words out. Tate glances over at them before turning back to me with a scowl.
“His brother Clay. Why?”
My heart hammers relentlessly in my ears and I struggle to breathe as my mind goes blank.
No.
No.
No.
This can’t be happening.
“Hey, are you okay?” Tate asks, reaching out and touching my arm. I jump and tears well up in my eyes as I look at her.
“I need you to get me out of here,” I rasp and her scowl deepens.
“What’s go…”
I shake my head. “No questions, please. I just need you to get me out of here without Lucas seeing me.”
We both glance back to the hallway and both Lucas and his brother are gone and the air feels a little less heavy as I turn back to her. She studies my face for a moment before nodding.
“Okay, but I’ll have to tell him that I took you home after I get back.”
I nod. “That’s okay.”
When she agrees, I gather up my things and Brooklyn before following her outside. After I buckle Brooklyn into her car seat, she climbs behind the wheel of my car and I promise her that Alice will give her a ride back after giving her directions to my house.
“You have to tell me what’s going on here, Quinn,” she urges and I shake my head.
“I can’t. Not yet.” Hell, I can’t even process it myself yet so there’s no way I could coherently explain it to her. She sighs and nods, glancing over at me periodically as we drive to my house. I’m counting down the seconds until we get there as my insides feel like they’re exploding.
Just one more mile, I tell myself, barely holding the tears at bay.
Just one more block.
Just one more street.
Just one more house.