‘Me too, it’s been a good day. I do love you, Clare,’ he said.
‘I love you too. And I’m sorry if I sometimes come over as jealous. I don’t mean to be – it’s just that I don’t want to lose you. Again.’
‘You won’t lose me, you’re stuck with me.’ He smiled and I put my hand on his knee, old feelings thawing, warm memories of us flooding back. Having the time to be together, to be alone, was priceless. It was all we needed to get back on track. Other people and lack of time were the problem in our busy lives.
‘Perhaps next year we could go on holiday alone? Just the five of us?’ I suggested.
Dan nodded slowly. We both knew it wouldn’t be an easy conversation to have with his mother – it was her chance to get us all together, keep us close. As a mum, I understood that, but now, with Ella, things were different. While she was around, nothing would ever be the same.
We drove along and I lost myself in my thoughts. My mind went straight back to the granitas woman. I’ll never forget the look on her face. I had no idea what she’d said, but it was the urgency in her voice that freaked me out, and, yes, I’m sure she was talking about the dangerous road ahead, but I took it to mean something more. A warning. I’m not a superstitious person, but later, after it happened, it turned out I was right to be scared.
Chapter Eighteen
On our return to the villa, we were greeted by a demonstrative Joy, glass of gin in hand, standing on the gravel outside. She was gesticulating at an imaginary watch in a really annoying way, implying we were late, and some of the loveliness of the day was blurred as I clenched my teeth into a smile I didn’t mean.
‘It’s almost six,’ she was saying, as we got out of the car. Despite me struggling to get the children from the car, she continued to talk, without helping. ‘We thought we’d go out tonight. There’s this gorgeous little restaurant just down the road. We’ve ordered two taxis for eight o’clock, so come on, get a move on. You all need to get showered and ready. I’ve been trying to get hold of you all afternoon,’ she was saying to Dan.
It had been a long day and with the image of the old lady still in my head and fraught from the journey back, I couldn’t muster the energy to try and put up with ‘the Ella show’ tonight. ‘Sorry, Joy, but we won’t be coming out with you, the kids are tired and—’
‘Oh, but you have to. The kids will be fine, they’re on holiday!’ She turned to Violet. ‘You want to come out tonight to a lovely restaurant, don’t you, sweetie? They have the most amazing gelato – you love gelato, don’t you?’
Violet nodded enthusiastically. ‘Is Auntie Ella going too?’
‘Of course. It was Auntie Ella’s idea.’ Then she looked up at me and Dan. ‘Ella’s been before, says they do the best pasta in Amalfi – and it’s her treat,’ Joy gushed.
Was there no end to Ella’s knowledge and talents?
‘No, we couldn’t let her pay,’ Dan started.
‘We aren’t going,’ I said insistently.
‘She’s adamant.’ Joy spoke over me. ‘She said, “Joy – it’s time you had a night off, you’ve been in that kitchen since we got here!”’ She then added pointedly, through a beaming smile, ‘So thoughtful.’
I looked away. I wanted to scream. I was tired and sweaty, I needed a shower, the kids needed feeding, then a bath, and I’d really wanted to spend the evening relaxing in the garden. I’d even hoped to go perhaps for a romantic walk alone with Dan, see if we could continue the good vibes from the day, but those good vibes were already beginning to fade and Freddie had now woken up and was crying. Alfie was moaning he was hungry and Violet was jumping up and down saying, ‘Mummy, Mummy! Can I go and find Auntie Ella to show her my beach photos on my phone?’
Violet had been given a very basic phone for her birthday, ostensibly to keep in touch with me and Dan, but like all her friends, it had become so much more. ‘Darling, just wait until we’re all inside, and you can find her then.’
‘But, Muuum! She said if I hurry back she’ll put my best photos on her Instagram.’
‘Did she?’ I said doubtfully, trying to undo Freddie’s car seat while Joy wittered on to Dan in the background.
‘I mean it’s not like I’m being bossy, Dan…’ Clearly she still hadn’t forgiven me for what I’d said to Ella. It might have helped if she’d faced me with it, asked me what I meant, but she liked to work subtly, and I couldn’t address it because how did I know Ella had told her? I could hardly explain that I was listening in on their conversation. Anyway, I figured that once I found the earrings and told everyone about Ella, Joy would know which daughter-in-law was really on her side.
‘I have to find Auntie Ella,’ Violet was saying. ‘She said I had to show her my photos straight away.’
‘I don’t think she did,’ I said, with a tense smile. Violet often used other people as a technique for getting her own way: ‘The teacher says we mustn’t do homework tonight’ and ‘Dad said that last bar of chocolate in the cupboard is mine, not Alfie’s’.
‘Muum, she texted me and asked if I’d send them, but I didn’t have enough data, so I have to send them from the villa.’
‘She texted you, on the beach?’ I wasn’t sure why, but I didn’t like it that Ella was texting Violet without my knowledge. Private conversations between my nine-year-old and a grown woman we’d known less than a week? It didn’t feel right.
‘Yes, she texted me on the beach,’ Violet said defiantly, brow now furrowed, hand on hip, then both arms thrown in the air. ‘Muuum, pleeeeease! She’s got twenty-five thousand followers.’
‘And I’m sure they’ve got plenty of Auntie Ella’s tiny bikini photos to be going on with,’ I said under my breath. ‘They can wait for your beach photos,’ I added, finally lifting Freddie from his car seat and handing Violet the beach bag, which was big and heavy. ‘Give it to Dad,’ I said, but Dan and his mother were now walking into the villa. Joy was chatting away, their arms linked, the two of them like bloody royalty, while I, the maid, was left to pick up after them. I was furious and yelled at Alfie to get out of the car, which I instantly felt bad about. And just to add to ‘the holiday feeling’, Freddie’s grisliness was now full on tears and snot. ‘Great,’ I said, on the verge of tears myself.
‘It’s okay, Mum, I’ll help you,’ Violet said, picking up on my distress in her own childlike way. As the eldest, Violet was so aware of other people’s needs that her own needs and wants were often overlooked. I couldn’t help but feel guilty, as her mum it was my job to make sure she was considered, and with two younger children to worry about, that wasn’t always easy.
‘No, it’s fine, sweetie. I’ll take the bag, why don’t you go and see Auntie Ella?’ I said gently.
‘But you said—’
‘It’s fine,’ I repeated, and she ran through the house in search of Auntie Ella and the promised fifteen minutes of Instagram fame. God knows where she’d find her, I just hoped she didn’t run upstairs, and go into their bedroom without knocking.