Or maybe it was just that breathing hurt in general, hitching every time he inhaled because he couldn’t stop thinking about Vivian at the cottage all alone on Christmas Day. And how much he wanted to be there with the woman he loved, instead of here.
But she’d asked him to go—needed him to go—and so here he was.
Worse than that, she was going to leave, he just knew it. Sure, she’d always been going to leave but these past weeks they’d grown so close he’d been lulled into a false sense of security. And he’d been counting on having three months. Hell, he’d been hoping she might be amendable to pushing that to the full six months. But with the store gone and a rebuild/remodel likely months away according to the conversations she’d been having, there was no reason for her to stick around.
And she was going to walk away. Maybe not today or tomorrow…but soon. He felt it in the way she was withdrawing from him, in the way she was pushing him into the arms of his family. Hell, he felt it right down to his fucking bones.
And he didn’t know what to do about it because he’d promised her he wouldn’t fall in love. He’d sworn it on his deputy badge. So he couldn’t confess his feelings.
Which meant he was going to have to let her walk away. Watch her walk away.
The front door was locked so he knocked and waited, a container full of his mother’s favorite hot chocolate stirrers in hand. “Hey, Reuben.” His mother grinned and pulled him in for a tight hug on the doorstep. “Merry Christmas.”
Reuben shut his eyes for a second and leaned into her embrace before saying, “Merry Christmas, Mom,” and pulling back.
Gaylene looked over his shoulder. “No Viv?”
“She sends her apologies and these.” He passed over the container. “She’s pretty wiped from last night and not much in a celebrating mood.”
“Of course.” His mom nodded sympathetically. “I don’t blame her. It was so awful, poor thing.” And then she frowned, her shrewd gaze narrowing, those eagle eyes inspecting what felt like every skin cell on his face. “Are you okay?”
Reuben thought about denying how he was feeling for a nanosecond but his heart was too heavy not to talk to somebody. “No.”
Her hand slid onto his arm. “What happened?”
He let out a long exhalation. “I’m in love with Vivian.”
She laughed then. Not unkindly. It was soft and low as she shook her head, her expression full of exasperated patience. “You don’t say?”
“Mom.” She didn’t realize how bad this was. “I promised on my deputy badge I wouldn’t do that.”
She sighed and rolled her eyes. “Well that was kinda stupid wasn’t it?” But then she gave his arm a squeeze and stood aside. “Come on in.”
*
The next few days flew by for Vivian in a kind of a haze. She’d switched into survival mode. The way she saw it, she had two options. She could wallow about the misfortune that had befallen them or she could start the process of getting the store back on its feet.
And she chose the latter.
It wasn’t just a point of pride for her, or for Delish—two local employees depended on the store opening again. And they were her priority. So, she put her head down and did what had to be done.
By the end of the day after Christmas the investigators had given them the all clear, finding it was an electrical fault in the hand dryer in the staff restroom that had caused the blaze. Then, for the next two days she and Robbie and Mackenzie worked their fingers to the bone clearing the store, salvaging the few items that could be salvaged and tossing everything else, taking it back to a shell.
When the insurance was all settled—probably by the end of March according to head office—Delish would send their guys to fit out the store again but in the meantime, it would stay empty.
Empty but ready.
The whole town pitched in with the cleanup. Dumpsters suddenly appeared at the back door for them to throw stuff into. The firehouse chief sent several of his men to help them move the heavy stuff—something that was very much appreciated by Mackenzie in particular, who was single and grateful for any eye candy to help the medicine go down. The hardware store loaned them high-pressure water cleaners. People stopped by and brought them coffee and lunch and baked goodies for morning and afternoon tea.
Edwin even sent huckleberry pie from the Graff.
The only help she hadn’t accepted had been from Reuben. He’d wanted to take a couple of days off but Viv had been adamant that he didn’t. She knew they were understaffed and she didn’t want him pissing off his boss. They had plenty of help and she was trying really hard not to have to deal with them at the moment. She could only deal with one big thing at a time and salvaging what she could from Delish right now was taking up all her physical and emotional energy.
The same went for when she got back to the cottage. She was just too damn tired at the end of the day to deal with anything. All she had the energy for was scrubbing herself in the shower then flopping into bed and crashing into sleep with barely a kiss good night for Reuben.
Not that she was particularly desirable at the moment.
Coming home with soot on her face and under her nails and her filthy sweats she was the exact opposite of that sophisticated woman in a silky blouse, tight skirt and Louboutins Reuben had picked up in Bozeman. And then there was the stench of smoke that clung to her clothes and her skin and stuck in her nostrils long after she left.
Oh yeah, baby. She was a real femme fatale these days.
Viv was just damn lucky he was so understanding and that they had the kind of relationship where he didn’t need to be with her every single second of the day and was happy to do his own thing. It would have been hell on earth if Reuben had been the type to stomp around bitching about how little attention she was paying to him and she was glad they’d laid down the ground rules from the beginning.
On the thirtieth of December, Harriet Walker, Delish CEO, drove into town to check out the damage. Viv almost cried when she saw the big boss get out of her vehicle. Until now they’d been talking over the phone and Skype but to see her in person and to have her hold her arms out and give Viv a hug was way more emotional than Viv had expected.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
“I am now,” Viv said with a watery smile.
Viv went to perform the introductions of Robbie and Mackenzie but Harriet already knew who was who and moved forward, shaking hands warmly, asking after them and thanking them for all their hard work. The two women were beaming by the time the introductions were over, which made the sad task of showing Harriet the store a little easier.
She was obviously shocked at what she saw but hastened to assure them all. “Nobody is to blame here,” Harriet said. “It was nobody’s fault. The most important thing was that nobody got hurt and the fire was contained and didn’t spread. All this—” She waved her hand around. “We can fix this. It’s just bricks and mortar. Now…I’ve booked a table at the Graff for us all. Let’s go get us some nice lunch, my treat, and talk about how we’re going to get this shop up and running again.”
*
Several hours later it was just Viv and Harriet remaining at the table, chowing down on huckleberry pie. Viv took the opportunity to pitch her idea for a trial range of Delish huckleberry chocolate as they ate.