I rest my chin on the top of her head as my hand begins the slow glide up and down her back.
“Then, the door to the room opened, and I vowed to push the next man to his breaking point. I knew the next time would be the last time because I would force him to kill me. It had to end. I was done being their victim. But it was you who walked into the room that day. It wasn’t the man with the scars on his face or the man with the tattoo on the back of his hand who liked me to fight him. It was you. You saved me that day.”
I open my mouth to tell her that I’m only one piece in a massive machine that was working that day, but I can’t. I want to be her savior. I want to be the man she always comes to when she’s scared, lonely, or when she just needs someone to hold her.
I need to be that person for her, for me.
“I know you’re leaving tomorrow, but I just wanted you to know that no matter what, even if you can’t take down those evil men, you saved me, and for that, I’ll always be grateful.”
With tears staining her face, Mia raises her head and presses her lips to mine. Softened by her crying, her mouth is pure perfection, but this kiss is nothing like the one she tried to wield against me when she thought I was angry. This kiss is sweet and tender, a salty reminder of the woman she was, and it’s filled with the promise of the woman she hopes she’ll be again one day.
It’s over way too soon, but then she brushes her fingers down my cheek while looking into my eyes, and I’m lost to her. I’m lost in her pain, in the prospect of her future happiness, and now I’m the one making vows, promising my soul to whichever entity will take it if it means I can spend my life with this amazing woman.
“Just make sure you come back to me.”
I nod my head without even thinking.
Even death couldn’t keep me away from her at this point.
“I promise.”
Her lips press to mine one last time before she settles back on my chest. She drifts to sleep quickly, while I lie awake and imagine a life I never even dreamed of before.
Chapter 16
Mia
My confessions last night drained me, but the benefit of that is I slept like the dead.
But when I wake, Ryan is gone, the side of his bed cold, revealing that he’d been missing a while.
Anxiety tries to take over, but I push it down and stand.
Doubt that I can survive without him tries to seep in as I shower for the first time without him standing sentry at the door, but I manage to shove that down as well.
Just like I’d grown tired of being hurt while at the compound, I’ve also grown weary of letting my racing thoughts and fear control me. I’m safe here. I know that. I’ve known it since the first time I stepped foot on the property, probably since Ryan scooped me up off the floor in Miami, but only now, am I actually letting myself believe it. I have to. Living in fear is no longer an option. If I want my life back, I have to fight for it, and that’s exactly what I plan to do.
A knock and voices down the hall don’t make my skin crawl like it once did, but I’d be lying to myself if I didn’t acknowledge the increase of my pulse.
“Mia?” a female voice says on the other side of Ryan’s bedroom door. “Are you awake?”
The question is followed by a knock, and even though I want to be alone, I open the door, knowing that I’ve had enough solitude for the last two weeks to last a lifetime.
Misty smiles at me from the hallway, and even though she’s only like ten years younger than my own mother, I feel like we could be friends, and I need as many friends as I can get since Ryan will be gone for an undisclosed amount of time.
“Hey,” I offer because I’m unable to think of anything else to say.
“We were having breakfast and coffee at Em’s. Want to join us?”
“Sure,” I answer before I can even think about telling her no.
Misty waits for me to grab one of Ryan’s oversized hoodies since we have to leave the clubhouse to get to Emmalyn’s home. I blame the frigid cold for the way my body shakes and shivers as we take the kitchen exit, but it continues as we step inside of the magnificent home.
“Wow,” I mumble as we enter through the kitchen of Em’s house. “And I thought the kitchen in the clubhouse was huge.”
“We do most of the family stuff here,” Misty explains as she shrugs out of her jacket.
I opt to keep Ryan’s sweatshirt on, certain I’ll never get warm again even as heat surrounds me.
“Even as big as it is, it still gets crowded when all the kids are home from college,” Khloe says as she joins us in the kitchen.
The luxurious scent of coffee and sweets fill the air as we step closer to the kitchen island. Before long, Emmalyn joins us with a smile on her face.
“Now that the men are gone, we can talk freely,” she says, pouring four steaming cups of coffee.
This was a bad idea. They want to talk freely? It took everything I had to make my whispered confessions in the dark last night, and even though I’ve grown closer to Ryan with each passing day, it was one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done. I can’t discuss the same things with these women. As nice as they seem, I don’t have a bond or connection to them like I do with Ryan.
“I would never tell Dustin this,” Khloe begins, “but I’m bored beyond belief, and even though it’s only been six months, I regret retiring.”
“Me too,” Em adds. “There’s only so much I can find to keep myself busy.”
“What did you both do?” I ask, hoping that the topic of conversation stays on them and doesn’t begin to veer to me.
“I taught elementary school,” Em says before hitching a thumb over her shoulder to indicate Khloe. “She was braver and taught middle school.”
I look at Misty, who just shrugs. “I’ve always stayed at home. I don’t have a problem with boredom. That’s what naps and books are for.”
Emmalyn scoffs, and Khloe chuckles.
“We’re used to chaos, but since Landon is older now, I can’t seem to find anything that holds my interest. He’s so wrapped up in sports and his friends at school,” Khloe explains.
“Don’t forget his recent discovery of the opposite sex,” Emmalyn interjects.
They all chuckle, and I find myself smiling, too.
“And there’s that.” Khloe smiles. “I miss the baby days when the entire daylight hours were spent making them meals, cleaning up after them, and providing for their every need.”
“I don’t,” Misty huffs. “Griffin and Cannon were a damn handful. Hell, Cannon is still a handful, and he’s a grown man.”
“I’m a grandma,” Emmalyn says with a smile. “That’s what you ladies need. Grandbabies.”
Khloe takes a step back, waving her arms in front of her. “I think I’m a couple of years away from that stage.”
“Ivy has to finish school, and I’m pretty sure they’re enjoying their alone time together. Cannon? Well, with the way that boy behaves, I wouldn’t be surprised if we had babies show up on the doorstep.”
“Ivy is your daughter?” I ask Emmalyn.
She nods.
“And Griffin is my son,” Misty adds. “And when they get married, we’ll truly be family.”