“Drew,” I choke. “What happened with Ashton—”
“Stop,” he snaps. “Just stop.”
I step until we’re nose to nose. “We were fighting and then…” I close my eyes, frowning. “Then we were kissing. I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine.” His words are cold. “Can I leave now?”
I open my eyes to look at him. “I fucked up.”
“It was just a kiss,” he mutters. “Not a big deal.”
“It was, though.” I fist the front of his shirt, aching to kiss him until he forgives me. “After what you and I did this weekend, I shouldn’t have done that. I’m sorry.”
“Brayden…” He sighs. “I’m more worried about Mia right now than my feelings.”
His words make me flinch—a stab from a double-edged sword. They’re a reminder that another person was hurt by that kiss. Mia. And that he holds her feelings above his own.
I’m storming with confusing emotions.
“I’ll talk to her,” I assure him. “I’ll make this right.”
Drew snorts in disbelief. “It’s too fucked up to ever be right.”
“Please don’t shut me out,” I beg, hating the vulnerability in my tone. “Please.”
His blue eyes soften as he studies me, seemingly searching for answers as to what is going on in my head. I’ll tell him. Whatever he needs to hear to make it right again.
“I’m not shutting you out.” His hand grips my wrist, but he doesn’t pull my hand away from where I hold on to his shirt. “I just need space to think.”
“About us?” My voice cracks. “I’ve been thinking a lot about us.”
I know I fucked up and kissed Ashton back. I’d gotten so caught up in the way he was taunting me that it just sort of happened. I’d be a liar if I said I wasn’t attracted to Ashton. Seeing him swim is what changed things for me. From hating him to admiring him. When he had me pinned and was fucking with me to piss me off, I got turned on. That kiss was… unfortunately, really fucking nice.
It was just with the wrong person.
“I need to leave,” Drew reminds me. “We can talk later.”
I crave to kiss him and hug him. To show him that we really can be okay. All we have to do is try. I’m not confused right now. I want Drew. I want to make it right.
“Tell me we’ll be okay.”
He lets out a heavy sigh. “We’ll be okay.”
Even though he doesn’t sound convincing at all, I’m fucking elated. I release his shirt to hug him, burying my face against his neck. My heart tightens inside my chest when he hugs me back. Everything is fucked-up and messy, but being like this with Drew is one of the right and good things in my world.
Someone clears their throat.
Drew and I fly apart. My skin prickles with worry when I whirl around to find Dean Carter staring at us, wearing a frown that looks so much like Ashton’s it’s frightening.
“Dean Carter,” Drew rasps out. “I was—”
“My brother,” I choke out. “Comforting me about my brother. He knew him too.”
I feel like shit throwing Ben out there, but I sure as hell don’t want Drew to get his ass reamed for hugging me. We were friends long before he was my coach. But, to an outsider, I know it looks bad, especially since I’m half-naked from my shower.
“I’m sorry,” Dean Carter says to me before turning his attention to Drew. “I just came by to congratulate you on the win. Again. This is going to be a great season.”
I throw on my shirt and then scoop up my bag. “Later, guys.”
I’m buzzing with worry as I head for the tutoring center where I have an appointment with Mia. Now that I’ve put some distance between Drew and me, I can’t help but mull over his words. She’s probably feeling all kinds of betrayed. Not only did she catch the boy she’s stupidly in love with kissing someone, but it had to be me. The same guy who flew all the way out to California to surprise her. The same guy who took her on a date and was intimate with her. The same guy who broke things off with her in order to pursue something with Drew.
I’m a fucking mess.
Mia doesn’t deserve this.
If Drew and I will be okay, maybe Mia and I can be too. She’s sweet and trusting and caring. Not the type to hold grudges forever. Maybe one day we can go back to being friends. I owe her an apology and I won’t feel right until I’ve made it.
I bump into a girl and steady her so she doesn’t fall. It’s a familiar girl I’ve seen around a few times.
“Sorry,” I grunt out. “Didn’t see you there.”
“Brayden Murphy?”
I grin because it’s what my fans expect. “That’s me.”
“Sasha. Remember me?”
I’m nodding even though I had no fucking idea what her name was. “That’s right. How’s it going?”
“Just busy. My daddy’s been planning the athletic program’s annual fundraising event, so I’ve been hunting down items for the auction.” Ah, I don’t know her, but I do know her dad. From what I’ve heard, he graduated twenty years ago and still holds half the football records. Could’ve gone pro, but he blew out his knee. Now he’s just an old man living vicariously through the younger generation. Can’t complain, though… It’s because of the fundraising events he organizes that the hockey team got all new equipment and uniforms this year.
“I’m planning a dating auction.” She smiles, batting her fake lashes at me.
“I’m sure you’ll earn lots of money with that.” I scan the tutoring center behind her, looking for Mia. “Let me know how it goes.”
Her fingers wrap around my bicep, stopping me. “I thought maybe you’d like to offer a date for an auction item. A portion of the proceeds do go toward hockey after all.”
“Me?” I frown at her. Drew’s already told the team we have to go, but I was just planning to make an appearance and then dip the fuck out.
“You’re the most loved hockey player this school has,” she explains, her pink lips quirking up on one side. “I’ve already wrangled the quarterback of the football team and the starting center of the basketball team. I tell you, it’s fate we bumped into each other. Literally.”
“Uhh,” I groan, running my fingers through my wet hair. “I guess, yeah.” Anything to get the hell out of here.
“Wonderful,” she says, flashing me her mouth full of perfect veneers. “It’s a good thing this is for a good cause. I won’t mind one bit outbidding everyone for a date with you.”
The thought of going on a date—albeit a paid-for one—with this chick is nauseating.
“Right,” I grunt out. “So I gotta go.”
“I’ll have my assistant, Bianca, email you with the details.” She gives my bicep another squeeze before releasing me. “See you soon.”
Glad to be away from her, I stalk over to the guy running the tutoring center reception desk. Some nerd with glasses and a face full of pimples. As soon as he sees me, he blushes.
“What?” I demand, confused at his sudden embarrassment.