“No, but in putting you in her arms, I came looking, and from that first look, I wanted her. Every single day since then, her life is at risk. Now that her cancer is … she’s winning. Look, I know you’re angry, but you don’t get to be angry at her. I was the one who said you would never find out the truth. Kayla isn’t worth your time. She was a fucking whore. The only good thing about her was she gave you to Lexie. That was all.”
“You don’t regret it at all. Sleeping with one sister and making a life with another.”
Devil cursed, hands on hips. “How can I regret what happened for a single moment, Simon? If I hadn’t fucked Kayla, you wouldn’t be here and I’d never have met Lexie. Am I proud of what I did? No. Do I regret it? Hell no. I love my life. I love my son. I love my woman. I’ve got a family, a place in this world. There’s nothing to regret. I’m the happiest motherfucker around. Hate me all you want. This was my decision, not Lexie’s, but don’t wait around too long to talk to her. She misses you. I miss you.”
“I can’t come back. Not yet.”
“Fine. You’ve got stuff you need to do, I get it. Don’t make her suffer for my decisions. That I can never accept.”
Simon nodded.
“I made any sense to you?” Devil asked.
“Yeah.”
“A lot?”
“Some.”
“Good. That’s all I needed to know. I can’t convince you to come back with me?” Devil asked.
“You can order me back.”
“No, I’m not going to do that. You know where your home is. I can wait. I don’t like you being here but at least I know you’re in good hands.” Devil rubbed at his brow.
“I’m shocked,” Simon said. “I expected you to order me back home.”
Devil blew out a breath. “Sometimes we’ve got to get a shitload of stuff out of our system. Whatever you need to do here, I’ll respect that decision, so long as you talk to your mother.”
Simon pulled out his cell phone. He found his mom’s number and called. Part of him wanted it to go to voicemail. Of course, he wasn’t that lucky and she answered right away.
“Hey … Mom,” he said, hesitating just slightly. “It’s me.”
“Oh, honey. It’s you. I bet your dad is there, isn’t he?”
He chuckled. “Yeah, he’s here. He’s watching me right now.”
“You tell him that I’ve told him to leave you alone.” He repeated it and Devil just stared.
“He’s giving me the evils.”
She chuckled. “I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too, Mom,” he said.
“You have?”
“Yes.”
“I wish … oh, Simon, I wish a lot of things could have gone differently. I hope you know that.”
“I know it.”
“Good. I never wanted to hurt you.”
“I know. I get it.”
“I do have some pictures of Kayla, not a lot, and they are old. None of her pregnant. You see, I didn’t know she was pregnant with you until she came. You were such a beautiful baby. I loved you so much.”
Tears filled his eyes as he imagined a young Lexie. There were plenty of pictures of her younger, and she’d always looked so sweet and kind.
“Thank you,” he said.
“What for?”
“For taking me in.”
“Of course I would, silly. You’re my son. I mean, nephew. I’m not good at this.”
“No, you’re my mom. You will always be my mom. I’ve been stupid. That’s all. I was so confused and hearing Curse, I made a mistake.”
“We can talk about it anytime. I’m a phone call away unless you’re coming home soon?” she asked.
He heard the hope in her voice and he hated the thought of disappointing her.
“No, I can’t. Not yet. There are a few things I’ve got to do first.” He ran a hand down his face, clearing his eyes from the tears.
“O-okay, well, I’m here, always. Go easy on your father. He misses you, and he was only ever making the right decision for you.”
He said his goodbyes and hung up.
“You can hate me all you want to, son, I don’t mind. Never, ever take it out on her.”
He nodded his agreement.
“How are things going with Tabitha?” Devil asked.
“You’re not going to be a grandpa yet.”
Devil laughed. “So long as it stays that way.”
“It will.”
“I’m going to head back. You sure you don’t want to come?”
In his mind, he saw Tabby, Luke, and what he hoped to do come her eighteenth birthday.
“Not yet.”
“You’re sure?” Devil asked.
“I’m sure. I’ve got things I need to do.”
“You’re still wearing the colors,” he said.
“Because there is no other club I could ever want.”
“Good answer.” Devil stepped toward him and Simon was surprised as he hugged him. “Thank you.”
He slapped his dad’s back, feeling the emotion clog his throat. He didn’t want to cry and he felt like such a fucking loser for it.
Tabby came to join him as he saw his father and the crew off. She wrapped her arms around his waist as he held up his hand, waving them goodbye.
“You okay?” she asked.
“I will be.”
“You didn’t go back with them.”
“I’m not ready to leave.”
“Good,” she said, kissing his neck. “I don’t want you to leave.”
****
“I can’t believe you’ve been on dates and you haven’t told me about them,” Tabitha said, flopping down on the grass beside her best friend.
Daisy sighed. “Just be silent and enjoy the sunshine while it lasts.”
“That is your way of not getting me to talk,” she said. “I see your game. I do.”
“Tabs, it hasn’t been a big deal. It’s been ice cream and not a lot else.” Daisy rolled onto her side. “What is it you want to know?”
“Have you kissed?”
Daisy’s face gave the game away.
“You have. Was it good?”
“Tabs, you kiss Simon like all the time.” In the past couple of months, Simon had gone back home a couple of times. She always expected a call from him to say that he was staying at home, but he continued to surprise her by returning each and every time. She loved him being around.
Of course, it meant a lot of sneaking. He stayed with Lash most of the time. They’d set him up in a bedroom as a permanent feature for him. Of course, he didn’t always stay in his bed as he snuck out all the time to come and sleep with her.
“Yeah, I know, and now we can talk about our boys’ kissing.”
“I don’t know if Anthony is mine.”
“He is totally yours. Now, tell me, is he a good kisser?”
“You tell me, is Simon?”
“Hell, yeah, of course he is. I love it when he starts at the corner of my mouth. His tongue tracing, and okay, I can go into graphic detail.”