But keeping it at bay won’t be easy.
Because . . .
“This is my favorite position,” I tell him as I rock into him, going deep, sliding almost all the way out, then filling him again.
“Yeah? Why?”
“Because I get to feel as much of you as possible. Get to have you so damn close to me,” I murmur, my lips brushing across his neck, up to his ear.
His cock jerks in my hand, and his breath comes fast and wild. “Same. It’s the same,” Stone says, his voice cracking.
“But there’s something I want to try next time,” I tell him, as my need for him unspools.
“Anything,” he murmurs, his voice hoarse. He’s so close, and I love doing this to him. I love giving him the most intense pleasure.
I push deeper, hold tighter, then kiss his earlobe. “Top me,” I whisper.
A shudder racks his body. “You want me to fuck you?”
“I want to feel everything with you,” I say, burning up at the prospect of him fucking me, lust tearing through me as I picture it. “Will you?”
He answers with a grunt. With a growl. Maybe with my name. Somewhere in there is a long, stretched-out yes as he detonates, coming all over my hand.
And I love it.
So much that my skin sizzles, my mind crackles, and I succumb seconds later, my climax tearing through my body as the world spirals away.
This man, this bliss—it’s all there is.
And all I want.
My body shakes as the aftereffects of my orgasm rip through me.
He’s still enjoying his, moaning, smiling, breathing hard.
A satisfied man.
My satisfied man.
I want to be the only one to ever make him feel this way.
“Mmm,” I murmur as I kiss his neck. I don’t want to leave him, but I need to ditch this condom.
I head to the bathroom, take care of business, grab a washcloth, wet it, and return to him, cleaning his chest. He’s flopped on his back now, supremely content.
Grabbing the blanket, I tug it off the bed, then toss it and the washcloth in the laundry bag in the closet. I snag another duvet, get in bed, and cover us.
Finally, I bring him into my arms, run both hands through his hair, and meet his eyes.
I see everything in them, and my chest aches.
I nearly serve up my whole entire heart.
But he goes first, his voice all gravelly sexy. “It’s incredible with you. I’ve never felt this way before,” he says in a midnight confession. “I never feel like you’re fucking a rock star.”
Emotion rips through me, flooding me as I drag my hand down his chest. “Because I’m not. I’m not fucking a rock star, Stone. I’m fucking you.” I spread my hand across his pecs. “I’m fucking the man.” I take a beat, drawing a breath, digging down deep. “And I’m making love to you.”
He shudders, parts his lips, and closes them again. Then he speaks softly. “Is that what you’re doing?”
“You tell me. How does it feel to you?”
“It feels that way, Jackson.”
“For me too,” I say, then I cover his lips with mine and pour all those emotions into a kiss—one that can’t possibly convey anything other than how desperately I’ve fallen in love with him.
30
Jackson
I leave early in the morning, whispering goodbye.
Stone’s eyes barely flutter open. He murmurs something I can’t understand—a cross between hi and don’t go.
“I promised Terrence and Cruz I’d go for a five-mile run with them, then work out. And Ryan is in town for his interview, so we’re having lunch. He’s the guy I’m mentoring.”
With a yawn, Stone lifts his arm, reaching for my face. “Miss you already. Come see me later.”
I clasp his hand to my cheek, holding him closer. “I will. I promise.”
A soft smile plays on his lips. “Good. I’ll be thinking of you.”
“Same.” I run a hand over his hair as he drifts back to slumber.
I leave, saying hi to Cruz outside the room.
He wiggles his brows. “Did you have a good pizza?”
I flip him the bird. “I’ll see you in a half hour so I can destroy you.”
He scoffs. “Good luck with that.”
I go to my room, brush my teeth, and wash the night off me so I won’t smell like the sex maniac I am when I work out with my friends. I put on running clothes and head to the lobby.
As Cruz’s shift ends, and a backup bodyguard covers for Terrence, I meet the guys outside the hotel.
We pile into a Lyft and make our way to Red Rock to run there. We talk some as we go. Terrence says he misses Melody. Cruz misses his little girl and his wife. I tell them I’m going to see Bethany in a few more days.
“And will you miss Stone?”
The question comes from Cruz as we crest a hill. Simple, direct.
On the downhill, I answer him the same way. “Yes, but . . .”
Terrence snaps his gaze my way. “Yes, but what?”
“Yes, but there are a million issues.”
Cruz knits his brow as he pounds the path. “A million, man? A million? Seems more like one.”
“Yes, one. Feels like a million,” I say as the sun rises higher.
“Does it though?” Terrence counters.
“Yes, it does.”
“Or does it feel like a million because you don’t know what you’re going to do about the fact that you’ll miss him?” Terrence asks.
I swallow roughly, my throat dry but not from the heat. More from the inquisition. But it’s a grilling I need.
I slow my pace some more, shake my head, then opt to level with my friends. Now is not the time to be macho. Now is the time to ask for help. “I don’t know what to do.”
Like a car slamming on the brakes, we all slow to a jog.
“What are your options?” Terrence asks.
I drag a hand over my hair. “I don’t know. That’s the thing. I just don’t know.”
“Do you want to be with him? Does he want to be with you?” Cruz asks.
Those are valid, important questions. A few days ago, I didn’t know the answer to either of them. Maybe twenty-four hours ago I didn’t know the answer to the second one.
Now I’m pretty sure the answers to both are the same.
“Yes, and yes,” I say with a heavy sigh.
Terrence offers me a palm to high-five. Cruz makes a fist for knocking. Shaking my head, I push out a laugh. “Guys,” I say, smacking back, then knocking. “It’s not that simple.”
“You’re right,” Cruz says in his no-nonsense fashion. “It’s not simple in the least. But it’s awesome.” He raps his fist against his sternum. “It’s awesome right here that you feel that way for another person. Life is short. Love is beautiful. Grab it, bro.”
A smile threatens to take over my mouth. “You think so?”
Terrence claps me on the shoulder. “I’ve been hoping you’d meet someone again. Someone who rocked your world but respected your wishes. Who didn’t put himself in harm’s way every day. Now you have. And now we need to figure out how you’re going to deal with it.”