Dropping my arms, I walk over to them.
“Yeah, you’re pretty cool, eh, Coop?” His eyes brighten as he looks at me, the way I’m sure they should when he looks at our mother.
There’s a loud crash from the living room and I startle, Zayn’s eyes immediately zeroing in on the door.
“It’s our parents,” I mutter, needing to wipe the concern off his face, not that the truth is likely to do that.
“What are they doing in there?”
I shrug. “Getting high? Wasted? Both? I don’t know, I’ve stopped worrying about it.”
“Poppy, I—”
“Please, Zayn. Don’t. I know how it sounds… how it looks, trust me. But please. No one knows about this. Even Harley doesn’t know how bad it is.”
Conflict passes across his face.
“You can’t live like this, Pops.”
I jump when his fingers brush mine, but instead of pulling away like I should, I allow him to pull me into his side.
“What other choice do I have?” I ask when I finally find my voice.
His lips part like he might have an answer but he soon closes them again.
“If I tell anyone about the reality here, we’ll all end up in the system. At least if I can wait until I’m eighteen then—”
“Then you should be getting ready to go to college. You shouldn’t be doing this.”
“Someone has to.”
Our eyes hold, his full of concern and worry as the sound of footsteps pound down the stairs behind me.
“What’s for dinner? I’m starving.”
“Who wants pizza?” Zayn announces, pulling his cell from his pocket and proceeding to order delivery.
“No, you don’t have to…”
“Please, Poppy. Just let me help.”
I open my mouth to argue but my stomach beats me to it and growls loudly.
Zayn raises a brow at me, and I forget any fight I might have had.
We have a quick debate about toppings and after discovering that all of us agree that pineapple does not belong on a pizza, Zayn places the order and I set about getting us drinks.
“You’ve got the choice between water or… water,” I say, looking in the cupboard in the hope of finding some juice but coming up empty.
“Do you know what? I was just thinking that I really fancy some water.”
His smile knocks me for six and I have to fight my need to walk over and plonk myself on his lap so I can show him just how much what he’s doing right now means to me.
I clear my throat after a second or two. “W-well that’s a relief.”
I grab four bottles of water and some plates and place them all on the table before going to make Cooper’s bottle.
“How’d you learn to do all that?” Zayn asks, nodding at me as I place it in a bowl of cold water in the hope it cools faster.
“Just picked it up, I guess. I watched with those two, and when you don’t have many choices, you just figure it out.” I drop the bowl in front of me, and lower myself to the chair beside him.
His fingers almost immediately find mine under the cover of the table. Unable to look away, I stare into his eyes as he shakes his head at me.
“What?” I ask, a shy smile twitching at my lips.
“You’re a little bit incredible, do you know that?” he whispers while Austin and Sofia bicker about something on the other side of the table.
“I’m just doing what needs to be done.”
Our connection holds and for a minute or two, I swear it could just be the two of us in the room. Everything else fades as so many things pass between us, despite the fact no words leave either of our lips.
My thighs clench as he runs his eyes down my body, once again hovering on my cleavage.
“I like this top. You really should have worn it while we were playing earlier.”
“Oh yeah?”
“You might have had a better chance at winning.”
“I’ll remember that for next time,” I whisper but my breath catches when I realize my mistake.
Why would there be a next time? Zayn is hardly going to want to come and hang out with my kid brother and sister again.
He could be at Aces right now with the team, with any member of the squad grinding down on his lap and whispering slutty promises in his ear. Why would he want to be here?
Cooper growls in his seat, telling me that his patience for the bottle is waning.
“What’s that look for?” Zayn asks, his hand resting on my waist, and I reach over him to take Cooper out of his seat.
I still as the heat from his hand burns through the fabric of my tank.
“N-nothing. Do you… want to feed him?”
“Me? You think I can?”
“Of course, he seems to love you.”
Zayn’s stare on me is intense, I feel the tingles it creates right down to my toes.
“Okay then. Sure. I’ve never fed a baby before.”
“It’s easy,” Sofia pipes up. “I do it all the time.” While she might be proud of her skills, a familiar sadness passes over Zayn’s face to what I feel.
“You’re a great big sister, Sof.” She beams at my praise as I lift Cooper and place him in Zayn’s arms.
My fingers brush his abs and chest as I release Cooper and his eyes fly to mine. Surely he didn’t feel the same spark I just did when I touched him.
Our eyes hold for a beat before Cooper complains that we’re taking too long.
Ripping my stare from Zayn, I collect his bottle, check the temperature and pass it over.
I give Zayn a couple of quick tips but Cooper is so hungry that he doesn’t allow Zayn to hang around.
Sitting beside him, I look at the two of them. He looks so natural sitting there holding a baby.
“Maybe you should let Shane and Chelsea come around to babysit one time, they sure could do with some practice,” he says with a laugh.
My stomach twists uncomfortably at the thought of inviting others here. He must see my panic because when he turns to look at me, he winces.
“I didn’t actually mean…”
“I know,” I say, reaching out and placing my hand on his forearm.
Sparks shoot from the innocent touch and our eyes lock once more.
“Do you ever get to go out? Get to be… normal?”
“I came to your party at New Year’s.”
He nods, probably casting his mind back to all the other parties I haven’t been at.
“And I went to one of Ethan’s a few months ago.”
“Pops,” he sighs.
“They’re not really my thing, it’s not a big deal.”
“It’s not just parties though, is it? It’s hanging out with friends, it’s going to Aces, the beach, the arcade. Anything.”
“Please… don’t.” He doesn’t need to tell me all of the things that I miss out on, although I don’t think he really appreciates right now that it’s not just because of these three monsters that I don’t do all those kinds of things. Even if I didn’t have kids to look after, I wouldn’t be there because I don’t want to see him.
Thoughts of Preston are like having a cold bucket of water thrown over me.
“What’s wrong?”
“N-nothing.” Thankfully, as I push my chair out to escape from his assessing stare, the doorbell rings.