Must stop thinking about her.
I put down the empty cup and steal another glance at the time.
Damn, I’m gonna be late. No time for breakfast.
I pull up the chat again and record a voice message for the kids.
“Uncle loves you, little worms, now I’ve got to go to work, be good for your mommy, okay?”
I pick up my jeep’s keys and my wallet and I sprint into my living room.
When I get to my door, as usual, I feel the hope I’ll catch a glimpse of her start to grow within me and I squash it.
Can’t think about this now. Gotta go.
I’m still coaching myself to keep my brain from wandering toward her when I step into the hall and there she is, right across from me.
Tess is standing barefoot in her doorway in tiny white shorts and an oversized pink tee with a cut-off neckline, one creamy shoulder exposed. She’s writing down a digital pad with a parcel under her left arm and an asshole delivery man is practically slobbering on his feet as he stares at her.
My entire body shakes with a jealousy I have no right to feel and I clench my fists at my sides as I talk myself into not walking up to the guy.
I’m about to say ‘fuck it’ and do it anyway, when a blur of gray shoots from behind Tess’s legs and into the hall.
I step right into the path of the furball and manage to catch it: it’s a large, fluffy Main Coon with a black and silver patterned coat and dazzling green eyes that stare daggers at me. The cat hisses in outrage, none too pleased about me cutting its escape short.
“Hey, there… settle down, buddy,” I murmur to the cat and walk up to Tess just as she moves pass the tool still blocking her door and now ogling her ass.
He really is looking to get his teeth knocked out it seems.
“Oh, thank you for catching her, Axel!”
“My pleasure, Tess, that’s a nice kitty you have there. She’s feisty.”
Fuck me, I did not say that out loud.
Please, someone just kill me now.
“Yeah,” she murmurs, hopefully not thinking much of my words as she blushes prettily and stretches her arms toward me with a smile that almost stops my heart and then cradles the escape artist to her chest.
“Rebel, you know you’re not supposed to run out like that, we talked about this!” she scolds, and her cat looks up at her, meowing and sounding almost contrite.
As she cuddles the cat, I side-step her and crowd the fucker still staring at what’s mine with his head tilted and all.
I just glower at him until he looks up and up at me and then takes a step back.
“Get the fuck lost,” I growl softly, my voice tight and my jaw tense.
He gets my message loud and clear and hotfoots it out of there without a backward glance at what’s mine.
I know I’m irrational when it comes down to her: I won’t make a move, but I can’t even think of her with someone else and I can’t stand the idea of some dickhead staring at her with lust in his eyes.
She feels mine even if she’s not.
It’s crazy and I know it, but I fucking love her and there’s nothing rational about this kind of things as far as I’m concerned, yet my hopes and desires mean nothing.
She would never go for someone like me.
Chapter 2
TESS
The delivery guy strangely runs away without a word, leaving me standing barefoot in the middle of the hall with my misbehaving cat cuddled in my arms and my heart stuck in my throat. I stare up into Axe’s sky-blue eyes and I frown at the intense look on his handsome face.
I swear the guy must really hate me or something: every time I run into him in the hall, in the lift or downstairs he just glowers at me and how fucked up it is that I found it really hot?
Of all the guys my poor heart had to pick for me to fall in love with for the first time, it had to be the one who can’t stand the sight of me.
Figures.
Not that I can blame the man for thinking I’m weird or something: every time I’m in his presence, I just stare up at him like an idiot and stutter some platitude about the weather.
We have been neighbors for a month already and I haven’t gotten further than finding out his name, Axel Constant.
The most we have talked is when we cross each other on the way to our respective apartments and even then I can barely murmur a ‘hello’ to the man.
I think the stuff he just said about my cat was the most he has ever spoken to me in a single occasion.
There have been the few times in which the mailman —bless him— slipped some of his stuff into my mailbox or some of my stuff into Axe’s and I’ve treasured those few precious moments.
How pathetic am I?
The first time I went knocking on his door, junk mail in hand, he came to open it wearing only black sweats hanging low on his sculpted hips.
I blushed so hard, my cheeks were practically glowing in the dark and I dropped my eyes, probably looking like a complete moron in the process.
I figured my best bet was to look away from the muscled masterpiece that is his chest if I wanted to get actual words out of my mouth.
Who would have thought that even his feet could be sexy and turn me into an even hotter mess, but then I maybe should have known: the guy is an over six-feet-tall sex-on-a-stick with hard rock muscles and a face that could melt ice.
In my defense, I have to say, this man could put any famous sex symbol to shame, there’s not one thing about him that doesn’t turn me into a mushy pile of overcooked Jell-O: from his large, muscular frame, to his big strong hands and all the stuff in between.
His short dark beard alone could have me stare at him like a ninny and those lips of his.
Damn.
And then there’s his manly, woodsy scent and the golden tan he’s been getting lately, probably from working outside all day under the sun —my snooping brought me to discover he has a job in a construction site.
But the things that really kill me are his deep-set eyes and the husky quality of his voice.
Oh God, Earth to Tess: get it together!
Here I am again, acting like some nutcase, my brain going on a tangent about his hunkyness and Rebel squirming in my arms as I realize I haven’t said anything in at least a long, long awkward minute.
Well, this is just peachy.
Say something, Tess. Anything.
Crap, talk about the weather if you must, just stop undressing the poor man!
He turns to look completely at me and gives me a tight smile.
Damn, he looks pissed.
And again I feel a decided tingle south.
What is wrong with me?!
Okay easy, easy.
Maybe try smiling again?
I grin up at him, murmuring another ‘thanks’ and Axel gives me one curt nod.
He combs the fingers of one large, roughened, sexy hand through his short light brown hair and sighs.
“I better get going, I’m already late for work,” he mumbles, his voice all raspy and low and then he’s on the move.
“I… I guess… I guess I’ll see you around then since we both… you know… live here.”