I don’t know why he wasn’t working the bar tonight. Sometimes he doesn’t. He’s one selfish prick. When I think about all the hours he makes Annie work…
Anger curdles my stomach, and I run my hand down Annie’s back, cupping her hip and letting myself dream again.
I’ve got the money.
It’s hiding under my bed right now.
We could take it, take the Dodge, grab Jackson, and drive away from this place. It’d be just like it was with Grandpa, stealing away for a better life.
Until—
The garage door thumps open and my head pops off the pillow.
I can’t see who it is in the dark, but the office doorknob starts to rattle, and then Jackson’s panicked whisper wakes Annie up completely.
“Dean’s drunk.” His voice is urgent. “He’s pissed. He’s been with Earl, and he’s lookin’ for you, Annie. He even went into your room!”
She jerks up with a gasp and scrambles over me. Snatching Jackson’s hand, she bolts out of the office and into the garage. I follow her, helping her open up the attic door when the stick is shaking too hard in her hand.
“Annie!” Dean’s hollering is muffled, but it must be pretty damn loud if we can hear it from here.
We scramble up the steps, and I jerk the trap door closed behind us.
Jackson whimpers and curls up on the bed. Annie joins him, wrapping her arm around his shoulders.
“I don’t want him to hurt you.” Jackson’s voice trembles.
“Shhhh. It’s all right,” Annie whispers.
I can’t see her in the dark, but I can guess how translucent her skin is right now.
Feeling around for the mattress, I perch on the end of it and shuffle along until I find her.
“Where you at?” Dean’s shout is clear. He must be outside the diner now. “We have to talk. That little snake tongue of yours has taken it too far this time, girl!” His words are slurred and frenetic. “It’s time I teach you a real lesson!”
Jackson whimpers again, and I wrap my arms around both him and Annie.
Pressing my lips against her forehead, I softly whisper, “It’s okay.”
“If I find you…” Dean’s slurred shouts trail off. “Or maybe I should go wake up your brother. He could use a good pounding. I warned you! I told you what would happen!”
Jackson starts to cry, but then the sound gets muffled. He must be bawling into Annie’s chest or something.
“I’m not gonna let him touch you,” she whispers, her voice fierce and unwavering. “He’s never gonna touch you.”
I love her.
The emotion swells so big inside of me, I nearly can’t speak.
Brushing my lips across her forehead, I lean my cheek against her and promise the same. “I’m not gonna let him touch you either. Never again.”
Her head shifts against mine, and I can sense her staring at me. Although we can’t see each other very clearly, I can tell we’re looking into each other’s eyes.
“You believe me?” I whisper.
She doesn’t answer right away, but then her soft voice does me in, filling me with a protective energy that I have never felt so strongly before. “Yes. I believe you.”
I kiss her cheek and pull her against me. My arms wind around Jackson’s shoulders too, and we stay huddled on the mattress together, listening to Dean’s drunken rants fade back into the apartment and then die out altogether.
Eventually we all lie down, three spoons on the mattress, and chase what feels like a very evasive sleep.
32
Dusk and Dawn
I wake with the sun. It pours in through the upper attic windows, telling me a new day has started whether I want it to or not.
I didn’t get much sleep last night. Trying to drift away with Dean’s rants swirling in my brain was damn near impossible. But Michael’s arms and his promise calmed me some.
Having Jackson curled up in front of me helped too.
He may be getting bigger by the day, but he’s still just a little kid who’s afraid of his daddy.
That’s not right.
I have to get him out of this place. Away from Dean.
Dean.
I wonder what state the apartment is in. When that man gets drunk, he loses it. Grumpy Dean is bad. Hungover Dean is kind of scary, but Drunk Dean is terrifying. All I can hope is that he’s sleeping it off right now.
I should go in and get changed while it’s safe. Then maybe Michael and I can take Jackson out for the day. He needs to do something fun. Be a carefree kid. We’ll deal with Dean’s bullshit later tonight. Hopefully he will have calmed down by then. Or better yet, not even remember his drunken night with Earl.
Rising carefully off the bed, I make sure not to wake anyone. Gazing down at Jackson’s face, I feel my heart bubble with that adoring love I’ve always felt toward him. Then my eyes drift to Michael and a whole other feeling fills my chest.
“I won’t let him touch you.”
Blowing him a soft kiss, I sneak to the attic door and quietly lower it. It clunks open and I whip over my shoulder to check, but neither one seems to have woken, so I disappear down into the garage and tiptoe past the Dodge.
The air is fresh when I step outside, cool and crisp on my face. I love this time of day. When the world is still untouched and new.
It makes me believe in the good things.
Tipping my head to the sun, I squint against the rays, grateful for a clear, blue-sky day. It definitely makes me feel like joy is possible and gives me the courage to go check out the apartment.
It’s not too bad.
There’s a shattered glass by the door leading to the bedrooms. Liquid marks run down the wall, and I can just picture the glass hurtling through the air and breaking. I’ll clean it up in a minute. Creeping down the hallway, I notice my door is gaping open and my bedsheets are mussed and strewn. My pillow is on the other side of the room. He must have thrown it in his rage.
Jackson’s door is open too, his bed a mess.
And then there’s Dean’s door at the end of the hallway.
It’s not open all the way, but enough for me to peek inside. Dean’s lying facedown on the bed, his boots hanging over the edge like he just fell and didn’t move again.
I quietly slip into the room and creep around the bed to check on his face. His cheek is smushed up against the pillow and his mouth is open. A big drool pool has formed on his pillow. I wrinkle my nose.
There’s a bottle in his hand, which has spilled across the duvet and left a potent whiskey tang in the air.
I back away, hoping he’s out for as much of the day as possible.
What I wouldn’t give to escape right now. We could pack up while he’s sleeping and never look back.
But I can’t be spontaneous about this. I need enough money. I need to get my timing right. When I take Jackson, Dean’s gonna be pissed, and even though he doesn’t act like he loves his son, he doesn’t want the boy stolen away from him.
He’ll come after us, and he’ll make me pay.
I so badly want to ask for Michael’s help, but I’d rather die than be a burden on anybody. He promised he wouldn’t let Dean touch me again, and I believe him. But Michael won’t be around forever, and when he goes, I need to be ready.