“Sweetheart, the things you want aren’t unusual. I know of at least two guys that wear what would be considered female underwear. One of them actually prefers to cross-dress in a scene, but more importantly they are both Doms. It’s not that unusual, and no one gets to say something is wrong anyway.”
“Both Doms?” Lucas said, completely shocked.
“That’s your societal-enforced conditioning showing,” Daddy said. “I say Dom and you think of an uber-masculine alpha in a designer suit.”
Lucas blushed, but he nodded. “I’d never even thought about it.”
“Then why don’t we pick up some different toys to take tomorrow to play with Charlie?”
“Not my puppies,” Lucas immediately said. They were special, and he wasn’t ready to share just yet.
“Okay. What other sorts of things do you like?”
“I loved the craft things at the club,” Lucas admitted. “And I like board games.”
“Really?” Jacob smiled. “That gives me lots of ideas.”
“Are you sure you don’t mind?”
“There’s nothing to mind,” Jacob assured him. “Did you know that littles don’t always age play at the same age?”
“You mean like middles, adolescents?”
“That too, but I meant individually. Some days you might want to just act like a middle, hang out, and watch TV, some days you might just want to curl up on my knee with your blanket and a binky.” Lucas sucked in a quick breath at the image that had just flashed through his mind. Oh. Oh, he’d never thought of that.
“I have a feeling my comment just opened up your mind to a whole world of possibilities,” Daddy said and nuzzled his hair. Lucas nodded slowly and rubbed his cheek on Daddy’s chest, loving the touch.
“How about if I go take the tray down while you go brush your teeth? It’s early, but I can bring the laptop up and you can look at some special sites. We can get most things delivered tomorrow.”
Lucas nodded eagerly and rushed into the bathroom. Did that mean Daddy might be staying in his room tonight? Even when Lucas had fallen asleep with him in there, he’d been gone by the next morning. Could he get him to stay? Did he want him to stay? His heart and his body both responded with a resounding yes, but his head kept reminding him he was running out of time. Daddy wasn’t going to suddenly decide he was going to stay. Why would he? Lucas didn’t think for one moment he was a powerful enough reason, and thanks to Lucas himself, Daddy was convinced Lucas wanted something temporary as well. He was pretty sure it had been the only way he could get Daddy to agree to his crazy scheme.
Lucas had just gotten back into bed when Jacob came back in, his robe tightened around him, carrying a couple bottles of water and his laptop. Lucas plumped the pillows invitingly, and Daddy got in. “There are a lot of sites, but this is one of my favorites, and it’s for all play ages.”
Lucas shuffled nearer, and Daddy lifted his arm so Lucas could use his chest as a pillow. He looked at the screens Jacob was flicking through and was immediately drawn to the boy in the onesie. Lucas’s eyes grew round, and without even being aware of it, he reached out and touched the soft, snuggly fabric the little was wrapped in. Of course, he just touched the screen and jerked his hand back as soon as he realized what he was doing. “Sorry.”
“There’s absolutely nothing to be sorry for,” Daddy soothed. “Is that something you might like?”
Lucas nodded slowly. On cold evenings all snuggled up by the fire. Maybe Daddy reading stories. Maybe…
Or maybe not. Because the clock was ticking. It took everything in Lucas not to sigh. He needed to concentrate on the here and now and deliberately let his hand drift down Daddy’s chest. He heard the contented rumble in the back of Daddy’s throat.
“Does my baby boy want some special touches?” And Daddy reached over to put the laptop away. Lucas smiled eagerly and explored some more. He thought about the panties and smiled. He was going to wear a pair tomorrow and make sure Daddy knew he had them on.
Chapter Seventeen
Jacob’s finger hovered over the Send button but then with determination sent the email accepting the job offer and confirmed his start date.
Jacob had been awake for a long time last night after Lucas had gone to sleep. Of course, a healthy orgasm would put him right out, and even though Jacob had loved what they did together, he seemed to have crossed a line he hadn’t been expecting.
And funnily enough, it wasn’t the sexual one, not that that wasn’t damn good, but he was worried that their four-week introduction into the lifestyle had been naive at best and disastrous at worse. Lucas was amazing, and he had been very honored to watch him go on the journey he had started to last night. It made his Dom heart beat a little faster to see a happier boy, but Jacob knew Lucas had a long ways to go before discovering who he was sexually as a person. Not that—he supposed—it meant that he would ever finish working himself out, and it was going to take a seriously committed Daddy to help Lucas work through everything.
Maybe it was enough he had help Lucas start? But even as he hoped that might be the case, he couldn’t help the sense of dissatisfaction about not knowing who Lucas was going to end up with. He was a special boy, and he needed someone who would understand.
Maybe he should talk to Patrick again. Would it help if he knew the Doms interested in replacing him, or would it irritate him like it had with Gabriel? He knew that answer before he’d even managed to get some sleep.
Jacob knew he had an unpleasant job he needed to do this morning, and he had better get it over with. Pulling up at the small two-story house in the tree-lined pleasant community was something he had done a good half dozen times with Ben, but not something he had done for the last two years. He picked out the large bag of presents he’d hastily put in gift bags this morning while Lucas was making breakfast, and set off down the driveway.
Grace opened it before he had a chance to ring the doorbell, and her face showed the shock he was sure his visit would cause, but also, he was glad to see, some happiness as well.
He was invited in and somewhat relieved that Ben’s sister had taken her dad out to the store and would miss them. He wasn’t sure he was ready to see all of Ben’s family. He offered the bag of presents. “If the twins already have what’s in them, they can be exchanged.”
Grace thanked him profusely and put the bag under the already groaning Christmas tree. “I was hoping you might have brought Lucas with you.”
Jacob gaped a little. He didn’t have a clue what to say. “I—he’s busy. He’s looking for a job, so he’s spending his time trying to set up some interviews.” Jacob seemed to be developing a talent for lying, or barely half-truths anyway.
Grace smiled. “It’s okay, you know. Ben wouldn’t have expected you to be alone forever, and I certainly don’t.” Jacob still didn’t know what to say, but now any words would have to fight past the lump in his throat. “You were an amazing partner to Ben. I couldn’t have wished for any better, but it’s okay to let him go.”
Jacob cleared his throat. “It’s not like that. Not with Lucas.”