Gavin turned her back to him, and swore at the glimmer of tears. “What the hell are you doing?” he asked, with no little amount of panic.
She blinked rapidly. “Nothing!”
He looked pained. “Hell, Piper, I didn’t mean to make you cry. Shit. Forget it. Forget all of it, it’s just a pet project I work on when I can’t sleep—”
“I’m not crying!” At least not all the way. “And I’m not mad. I’m . . . touched. Because it is wow and amazing. You’re wow and amazing.”
“I know,” he said, making her let out a soggy laugh. “So what’s the problem?”
“Gavin . . . we know nothing about running a B and B.”
“Yeah, but why should that stop us? Not knowing how to be not a drug addict didn’t stop me. Not knowing how to be a mom isn’t going to stop Winnie. Is not knowing how to be a physician assistant going to stop you?”
She sighed. “Yes.” But not for the reason he thought. If they did this, that would stop her.
He looked at her and understanding dawned. “You think this will cost you your dream.”
“I’m not sure how else to get tuition, and you and Winnie enough money to live on here while I’m gone. Plus this place is expensive to run, there’s a lot of maintenance and utilities . . .”
“We’d succeed at the B and B, Piper.”
“Okay, and while I do believe that, I don’t see it happening as fast as selling.”
“Maybe it’d work out better, you ever think of that?”
“We don’t have a lot of experience with better.”
He nodded, set down the tablet, and turned to go.
“Wait. Gavin—”
“You’ve made enough sacrifices for us.” He turned back. “From when we came here until . . . well, even now you’re sacrificing for us, staying when I know you want out because Mom and Dad are gone and you’re all we’ve got. It’s our turn to sacrifice.”
“How are you going to do that?”
“I don’t know yet.” He paused and looked at her, really looked at her as if he wanted to see inside. “Please tell me you think about them.”
Her chest went tight and she couldn’t speak. She thought about them all the time. But what was the use of telling him? She didn’t want him to hurt. “Gavin—”
“Never mind.” He shook his head. “I can’t really even picture them anymore. I try, but it’s hard. And . . .”
She closed her eyes. Because what was hard was seeing his pain. “And what?”
“Do you think they’d have been okay with me?”
“Oh, Gavin.” She grabbed his hand and pulled him in for a hard hug. “They would’ve loved you,” she said fiercely.
“Even the gay part?”
“Yes, they would’ve loved every part, I promise.”
He let her hug him for longer than he normally would before pulling back with a nod. “Thanks,” he said quietly and headed to the door.
“Where are you going?”
“To meet up with my sponsor.”
She blinked. “You have a sponsor?”
“Yes. From my NA group.” He met her gaze. “I’m taking this seriously, Piper. I need for you to be able to trust me on that.” He glanced at the tablet and plans for the B&B. “On everything, just like I trust you.”
“But how can you trust me when I didn’t even see that you were struggling with drugs?”
“I told you that wasn’t your fault. Let it go. I mean it, Piper. For this to work, for any of it to work . . .” He gestured to the table. “Like me running the B and B for us while you’re away at school, for example, you’ve got to be able to trust me.”
The door shut behind him and she said to it, “But we can’t do both the B and B and school . . .”
“We’ll find a way,” he said through the wood.
Shaking her head, she went in search of caffeine. If she was going to give up her dreams for Gavin’s and Winnie’s yet again, she was going to need a lot of it.
Chapter 25
“I’m going to take that as a hard yes.”
Piper spent the next week working either at the station or on the property. She didn’t enter anything new in her journal, which was rare for her. Instead, she worked at checking some things off her various lists. Like not taking extra overtime, buying something frivolous—sexy lingerie, thank you, Victoria’s Secret—and . . . actually wearing the sexy lingerie.
And though she’d agreed to think about Gavin and Winnie’s plan to turn the place into a B&B, she also still was exploring the option to sell.
At least, that was how she’d spent her days. Her nights, other than the three days Cam had flown back East to train with his unit, she’d spent in his arms exploring their attraction for each other.
But tonight was Emmitt Hayes’s fifty-sixth birthday, and they’d planned a surprise party. Piper had tried to warn everyone that he’d hate it, but Winnie was determined. She’d been in charge of figuring out who to invite, with Gavin being the resident caterer. He cooked while Cam got Emmitt out of the house by taking him fishing. Meanwhile, Piper set everything up, and when Cam texted that they’d docked, she made everyone hide.
A few minutes later, Emmitt and Cam entered the house and everyone jumped out of their hiding spots to yell “Surprise!” and “Happy birthday!”
Emmitt seemed thrilled, and the party got started. Piper was relieved, but not five minutes later, Cam turned to her. “He’s gone.”
“Who?”
“The birthday boy.”
“Are you kidding me?”
“Do you see him?”
Piper looked around. Nope, she did not. The house was full of his friends, including his maybe-girlfriend, Margaret, but there was no Emmitt in sight. He couldn’t have gotten far. “You check upstairs,” she said. “I’ll take a better look down here.”
She started in the kitchen, going still just outside the pantry door, where from within she could hear crinkle sounds she recognized all too well. She opened the door and, yep, found Emmitt eating a bag of Cheetos. “Hey,” she said, “that’s my usual MO, not yours.”
He shrugged and kept eating.
With a quick text to Cam that she’d found his dad, she sat on the floor next to him, reaching into the bag for herself.
“Birthdays aren’t my thing,” he said.
“Also my MO,” she said. “But you love being the center of attention. What’s going on?”
Before he could answer, the door cracked open and Cam slid in. He stared at his dad and then Piper, who gave him a palms up.
“You okay?” Cam asked his dad.
“Sure.”
“Then why are you in the pantry with my girlfriend?”
Piper’s heart skipped a beat. Girlfriend?
“Needed Cheetos,” his dad said. “And you just gave your ‘girlfriend’”—he used air quotes for the word—“a heart attack. Did you forget to tell her that’s what she is to you?”
Again, Cam looked at Piper, who was indeed trying not to swallow her tongue.