It sure fucking felt like she was abandoning me. “Right,” I chirped sarcastically. “I don’t want a bodyguard, Mom. I’m fine.”
“But you’re not fine,” Mom said. “You’re spending time with Hamilton, Vera. That in itself is a red flag. I’m not sure how I feel about you being around him. He looks at you like…like he wants to eat you up. Don’t think I didn’t notice how he was last night. Is something going on between you two? You’re about to start college, you don’t need the distraction. And Vera, I don’t think I have to tell you how irresponsible that would be. He’s technically your new uncle.”
My heart raced. My head pounded, and for a moment the only thing I could hear was the whoosh of blood in my ears. Did she want someone to protect me, or did she want someone to report back to them about where I was? “Hamilton is the only friend I have here. I would never do that to you. I can’t believe you would even ask me that,” I cursed. “He was just being nice to me. It’s not like you’ve been around. Saint really freaked me out.”
“I was on my honeymoon, Vera! You can’t blame me for finally being happy and in love and seeing the world. I’m sorry some psycho did that, but there wasn’t much I could do from Paris. I can’t spend every day of my life taking care of you.”
Her words felt like a punch to the gut. “I don’t need you to take care of me,” I whispered, feeling like a small child. “That’s not what I meant. I just don’t understand why I can’t be friends with Hamilton.”
“Because Joseph doesn’t trust him. I have to stand by my husband now, Vera.”
“What about standing by me? Or have you forgotten?”
“How could I ever forget!” Mom screamed, the veins in her neck bulging with anger. “I’ve spent my life standing by your side. Don’t you get it!? It’s my turn, Vera. It’s my turn to have all the things you stole from me.”
Mom’s eyes popped open in surprise. She placed her fingers to her lips and gasped as tears streamed down her face. My emotions felt like a water hose. I reached deep in my chest and turned the valve off, praying she didn’t see me break. “Baby. I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean it.”
“It’s fine,” I replied calmly, stopping her before she could say anything else. “I’m really happy for you and Joseph. You’re right. It’s selfish of me to get in the way. I want you to go.”
“Vera,” Mom whimpered. Tears streamed down her slender cheeks. “Vera, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean it.”
“Yeah. You did. Please tell Jack and Joseph I don’t want a bodyguard. It’s hard enough starting at a new school, I don’t need to be followed. The police are already doing everything in their power to catch him, and we’re installing a new security system here at the apartment. I’ll stop talking to Hamilton. I don’t want you to piss off your new husband. I’m sure I can make more friends once school starts.”
Mom set her coffee cup down and sighed. “I’m going to go,” she whispered. “Jack is throwing Joseph a party this weekend to celebrate. Will you be there? I want to see you before I leave.” Her voice was hopeful.
“Yep,” I replied with a tight smile. “I’ll be there.” I would always be there. I would always support my mother.
Mom gathered her purse and made her way over to the front door. With her hand lingering on the knob, she turned to look over her shoulder at me. “It’s just my turn,” she whispered. “I hope you can understand that.”
I averted my eyes.
Yeah. I got it.
The moment she was gone, my cell pinged, alerting me to a text.
Hamilton: How are you this morning?
I angrily typed out a response without thinking before blocking his number.
Me: Don’t text me again. This is done.
10
The opulent dining room Jack rented to host the celebration for Joseph was filled to the brim with power and influence. I’d seen some of these people at the wedding, but there were even more elbow-rubbing political influencers vying for Joseph’s attention. They had a few journalists scattered about, but I hadn’t seen Saint anywhere, thankfully.
An entire week had passed since my mother said those hurtful words. I spent most of the time in my apartment, moping and getting ready for school starting next week. I wasn’t sure if I didn’t want to leave my place because I was depressed or because I was still scared to see Saint. I absolutely felt safer in my apartment. It was like the things out to hurt me couldn’t see me if I just stayed in my pajamas under my covers.
But I couldn’t hide forever.
“You look beautiful, Vera,” Jack said while walking up to me. I looked down at the slinky black dress I wore and frowned. I hadn’t wanted to wear the expensive Vera Wang evening gown, but mother sent a single text reminding me that I needed to look nice for the evening.
“Thank you, Jack,” I replied with a tight smile. We hadn’t spoken since our last argument. I didn’t particularly want to talk to him now, but I knew that any animosity from me would be a direct representation of my mother. I didn’t want to make any more problems for her than I already had. “And thank you for having your personal stylist send this over,” I added while looking down at my strappy dress. Around the room, tables set with fine china, crisp white linens, and oversized floral arrangements filled the space. A string quartet played classical pieces in the corner of the room, making everything feel more elegant. The ambiance was rich with affluent touches only money could buy. It was the sort of wealth you couldn’t fake. Expensive diamonds dripped from the necks of women in evening gowns who clung to the arms of old men in perfectly tailored suits. They walked the room, scouting. Watching. Networking. Comparing. Gossiping. It felt over-the-top and exactly the sort of thing I wanted nothing to do with.
“I’ve missed chatting with you, you know. I’ve debated on calling you this week but wasn’t sure if you’d answer. I know my words were abrupt, but I hope we can move past it. It’s important that the family shows solidarity right now. This is an exciting time for the Beauregards.” I read his meaning loud and clear. Smile. Get over it. Look pretty for the pictures. “I’m really thankful you are here, and I’m so excited for you to start school next week.” I wanted to be frigid with Jack, but instead, I let out a slow exhale and said exactly what he wanted to hear.
“I understand why you did what you did. And I know you weren’t intentionally trying to be malicious. You were just protecting your family. I don’t know this world. I don’t know what you’ve had to do to safeguard your way of life. But I do know that we are stuck with one another. With Mom and Joseph moving to DC, you’ll be the only family I have around here.”
“Not exactly,” a familiar voice said at my back. Jack’s eyes widened, and his mouth parted. “I’m on the rig for a couple weeks every month, but I always come back. Like an annoying gnat you can’t swat away. Right, Jack?”
“Hamilton?” Jack stammered.
I spun around and nearly toppled over at the sight of Hamilton in a suit. His hair was combed to the side, and his broad shoulders looked impressive in the black jacket he wore. His bright purple tie complimented his tan skin, and his dark eyes glimmered with mischievousness.