I hated this limbo. I was stuck between avoiding her and wanting to confront her, and the longer I ignored her texts, the cruder and pushier they became. It was a side of her that I knew well but was seeing with fresh eyes. I always just assumed her ambitions and selfishness were a result of constantly fighting to survive. Now it felt…different. Darker. I loved my mother. I knew she loved me. But I also didn’t think she understood what healthy love looked like.
Mom: What are you doing?
Mom: Where are you?
Mom: Jared called me. You can’t seriously be angry at us for wanting to make sure you were safe. You had a stalker, Vera.
Mom: Jared is a nice guy! You’d do well to date a man like him. He comes from a good family. I met his mother at a banquet.
Mom: Why are you mad at me for this?
Mom: Jared said you aren’t home. Where are you staying, Vera? Joseph wants to talk to you.
Mom: Vera. Jack is calling now. We seriously need to talk about this. You can’t date Hamilton. I know you’re with him.
Mom: This is getting ridiculous.
Mom: Call me right now!
Mom: You’re so fucking selfish, Vera. I can’t believe that you’re willing to toss away our family just so you can get laid. I always knew you were a little slut.
I was scrolling through messages when Hamilton plucked my cell out of my hands with a huff. “No more reading texts for the day. Your mother is seriously going to piss me off. I’m starting to think that she and Joseph are perfect for one another. Toxic motherfuckers.” Hamilton groaned while tossing my phone on his nightstand before pulling me closer to him. He was spooning me in bed, wrapping his arms around my middle and breathing in my scent while nuzzling my neck. It was cozy. Comfortable. Intense.
We spent all Sunday at his place, fucking, talking, and eating his delicious cooking. He let me vent and spent most of the time reminding me that it didn’t matter what anyone thought. We weren’t hurting anyone, not really. We were just testing the stormy waters. I didn’t bring up my college tuition problems. It was too late now. I had a feeling that pretty soon my mother would inform me via text message that The Beauregards weren’t going to pay for my schooling anymore. She’d already threatened it. She made it very clear that if she was going down, she’d drag me with her. It wasn’t Hamilton’s fault or responsibility. I was the one who got myself in this mess. I knew the risks, and I still dove headfirst into this messy relationship with Hamilton.
“You have class today, right?”
“Yeah, I do.” Might as well attend whatever I could. There was no telling when they’d pull the plug on my education and the apartment I was staying in. I needed to find a job. I needed to find a place to stay.
“What are you thinking about?”
I swallowed. “Nothing,” I quickly replied. “Just thinking about all the homework I’ve been avoiding.” I didn’t want Hamilton to feel responsible for my mother’s fucked up ultimatum, and more so, I didn’t want him to feel obligated to help me.
“Get ready,” he whispered before kissing me. “I’ll make you some breakfast and drive you to school. You get out at three, right? I can pick you up then.”
“You know my schedule?” I asked, brow raised. It was little moments like this that reminded me how much Hamilton legitimately cared. Last night he made me strawberry shortcake for dessert because I mentioned it in passing that I used to eat it every year for my birthday. When I borrowed a shirt to sleep in, he also tossed me a pair of socks because he knew how much I hated when my toes were cold at night. It wasn’t grand gestures that made me feel safe with Hamilton, it was all the little ways he made me feel heard.
“I do. And I figured you’d like one more day to pretend that shit hasn’t hit the fan. Your mom is calling again,” he murmured before grabbing my cell and ignoring the call for me. I rolled over and rested my head against his chest, running the pad of my index finger along his abs.
“I need more than a day to pretend. Can I have a year or two? By the way, when do you have to go back to the rig?”
Hamilton softly ran his hand down my arm before replying. “Two weeks. We have plenty of time,” he whispered. “And I happen to like your avoidance tactics. The shower sex last night was—” Hamilton stopped to kiss his fingers like a chef.
“Whatever,” I replied before sitting up and shuffling out of his bed. Cool air washed over my skin as I made my way to his bathroom to shower and get ready for class. Shower sex actually sounded pretty nice, but I had a big day ahead of me. I’d have to see Jared in Dr. Bhavsar’s class, and I wasn’t ready for that confrontation. Not even a little bit. I was likely to punch him in the gut, especially after the texts from my mother this morning. I hadn’t even bothered to open the messages from him. I didn’t see the point. Everything he said was lies, lies, lies. Even though we only knew each other for a little bit, I was still overwhelmed by his betrayal. I thought Jared was a friend, but he was really just bribed into being in my life.
Deciding to look good for class, I showered and blow-dried my hair. I got dressed in a plaid skirt, black tights, my favorite boots and a black, crop top, knit sweater. When I made it into the kitchen, Hamilton was flipping an omelet and humming to himself, still wearing nothing but his boxers as he made breakfast. When he saw me, he licked his lips.
“Shit, you look good.”
“Thank you,” I replied with a blush. My phone was sitting on the counter and went off again. I eyed it warily. “Do you think they’ll file a missing person’s report if I don’t answer that soon?”
Hamilton looked at my phone, then back at me. “It’s possible. But you’re an adult, and they all know where you are. Jack called me last night.”
Jack had called? Shit. Jack had been honest about the lengths he’d go to when it came to protecting his family’s image. He’d looked into my mother’s background and was very likely regretting welcoming her into the family now. “What did he say?”
“I don’t know. I never answer his calls.” Hamilton turned off the stovetop and put my omelet on a paper plate and brought it over to me with a cup of coffee.
“And why is that, exactly?”
“Sometimes people don’t deserve forgiveness, Vera,” Hamilton replied before changing the subject. “What are you going to say when you finally talk to your mother?” Hamilton asked while handing me a fork and sitting down beside me. “We can practice. Want me to call you a crazy unclefucker to really set the scene?”
Rolling my eyes, I replied with a snappy, “No.” In a way, I was glad that Hamilton made this somewhat of a joke. Laughing about the entire situation was better than obsessing over it. “I’m not sure what I’m going to say to her. I suppose I’ll ask why she hired Jared and how much of his friendship and attention was her instruction and how much was him. I never wanted to date Jared, but it makes me feel cheap. He didn’t actually like me. I was just a means to an end. Our whole friendship was fake. He was clingy and annoying, but he was my first friend here. I just don’t like feeling so used.”
Hamilton looked at my plate, nodding. “That makes sense. I’m not defending him, but what if he genuinely developed feelings for you? Would it make a difference?”