But I did everything possible to remind myself that it was temporary. That Matteo would leave me, and I'd be left to pick up the pieces. My resolve only strengthened with time, the more Matteo chipped away at my armor with his strong presence and made me want things that would never happen. I resolved to find some kind of solution to making him move on sooner than later when it would hurt more but had no idea what that would be.
"You need to vary your routine," Scar pointed out as I opened my front door. He turned with a copy of my house key in hand, locking up behind me.
I'd long since gotten used to everyone having a key to my house. If they'd wanted to hurt me, they would have already. "I like my routine."
"It makes you easier to track, easier to follow. Your predictability makes you an easy target for people who might want to harm you," he grunted, picking up a jog beside me. The massive, hulking man hated running with me, but he did it anyway. He even managed to not slow me down too horribly, given the length of his legs and the way one of his strides equaled two of mine.
"You want me to run at a different time of day?" I asked, slowly building my pace. "It wakes me up to start my day. That's the point."
My breathing was steady, my body going to that place of focus that running always brought me to. "At the very least you should change your route. Makes it less predictable."
I considered it. "I don't want to get lost," I admitted. Even though I'd lived in the area for a few years, I didn't venture off the main roads. There was still a distinct possibility that I'd wander somewhere I shouldn't be.
"You'll have me," he grunted, his own breathing far less steady than mine.
"I won't always have you," I huffed a laugh. "You can't spend the rest of your life looking after me. Matteo will need you to do something else, eventually."
"He won't leave you unprotected." We turned the corner, heading up the road that would take us by the park. I could feel his eyes on me, even as I pointedly kept mine fixated on the park next to me. "What exactly do you think this is?"
"What?"
"Your relationship with Matteo. You still think he will walk away?" Under any normal circumstances, I would have been grateful for the interruption that saved me from answering.
Those were not normal circumstances.
My body jolted as I crashed into a man who jogged out of the park entrance. He emitted an "oof," catching me with stabilizing hands on my hips when I nearly fell on my face. "Easy." My body stilled, horror crashing over me when I recognized the voice that spoke from above me. Tilting my head back, I came face to face with what I thought might be Adrian Ricci. In all honesty, it was difficult to tell.
His face was beaten, bruised with a gash through his cheekbone, a split lip, and a bandage over his nose where it had been broken. Two purple bruises surrounded his cruel looking brown eyes. "I—Adrian?" I asked, stepping back far enough that I forced him to release his hold on my hips. One of his hands was wrapped in a bandage as it left my body hesitantly.
He winced dramatically. "I realize I'm a sight at the moment, but I assure you I'm all right."
"What happened to you?" I asked against my better judgment. I didn't need to know the details of what happened to Adrian, not given his business.
If what Matteo said was true, he deserved everything he got.
"Matteo didn't mention he came to my home and beat me bloody for sending you a little gift? Went into a jealous rage, in fact. Most men wouldn't dare, but Bellandi is untouchable." He shrugged, as if to brush off the revelation.
Matteo had beaten the shit out of him.
I remembered the blood on his shirt that day when he'd come back and destroyed Duke. I'd been so distracted I'd forgotten all about it. "That's enough," Scar hissed, tugging me behind him and blocking me from Adrian finally. I wondered what had made him wait so long, deciding that Adrian didn't pose much of a threat to me with him right there and on a crowded street in the middle of the morning.
Still, his words about changing my route seemed even more necessary, given what couldn't have been an accidental meeting. Adrian had followed me, stalked me, and learned my routine. Exactly for this purpose.
It sent a chill down my spine.
"We were just talking," Adrian held up two hands, feigning innocence even as he winked a bloodshot eye at me.
"Think very carefully if this is a war you want to begin. There are plenty of things that Matteo lets you get away with when he can't be bothered to care. This will not be one of them." Scar nudged me, pushing me to turn back the way I'd come. I started walking in that direction, going slowly so I wasn't far from Scar's protection.
"To the victor go the spoils of war," Adrian said, a smile in his voice. I turned back to look at Scar, finding Adrian's eyes on me. "I look forward to seeing you again, little doll." Scar caught up with me, pressing a hand to my back and urging me to leave Adrian behind us. When I finally turned away from him, it was with mounting terror over what was coming.
He wasn't giving up.
✽✽✽
Days passed, with my life a static, suspiciously routine pattern of events. But the constants in my life remained absent, until the day Sadie sat on my stool, finally back in the spot she'd been neglecting in favor of talking Duke down from the ledge. I felt Duke's absence fiercely, the text that I was making his favorite brownies going unanswered entirely, where he normally would have raced to my house.
"Did you know?" I asked her, pouring the batter into the brownie pan from my stand mixer.
She raised a brow at me, acting like it was ridiculous to think she wouldn't. "Everyone knew, honey."
"Everyone but me," I sighed, putting the pan in the oven and closing it. I stepped around the island, plopping onto a stool instead of immediately washing the bowl. Sadie looked at me with wide eyes, and I knew it didn't get past her as seriousness settled over her features.
"He never made a secret of it. You just didn't want to see it," she whispered, reaching over to pat my hand. "Now that you know, what do you plan to do with that information?"
I felt my jaw slacken, shocked she'd even suggest what I thought she was suggesting. "What do you mean?"
"Well, you could give him a shot," she suggested. "He loves you, Ive. Always has. He may not make you feel like Matteo always has, but he won't hurt you. You could do a lot worse."
I nodded, because she was right. "I know, but it's just—it's Duke. He's my best friend. It would be like dating you."
"I mean, I'm sure Duke and I have very different equipment. Can't say I've ever gone there, but—" she giggled, and I laughed with her. "He's not unattractive."
"I know, but we grew up together. How can I cross that line?"
"Kiss him. That's the best way to see if there's chemistry, find out if you can see him in another way," she suggested. My eyes bugged out of my head, envisioning the image of Duke touching me that way.
It didn't fit, no matter how much I might wish it did. I didn't want to hurt Duke, and I had promised I would find a man who could love me and give me a content life.