“You sure about that?”
“Yep.” I end the word with the pop of the “p,” hoping he’ll buy into my charade that I’m not affected at all by his presence.
He looks over my shoulder—not a hard task since he’s about a whole foot taller than me. I pray none of the boys have ventured into the living room and into his line of sight. Whatever he sees, or doesn’t see, seems to satisfy him because he glances back at me for a brief second before he turns back toward his car.
“Aren’t you forgetting something?” I call after him.
He turns halfway. His upper lip curls up in a wicked smirk. “Not unless you plan on inviting me in.”
Hello, Prey. Meet Hunter.
“Your name. So I can tell Liam you stopped by.”
“Mal. Tell him Mal stopped by.” He spins on his heel, heading back to his car. “I’ll be seeing you.”
The second his car is out of sight, I text Jake to come sit with the boys so I can go get Liam. Other than Brody, he’s the only one I trust to keep them safe. I’m done tiptoeing around what happened the night of the fire.
It’s time for the truth.
Liam is nowhere to be seen when I pull up at the brewery. The blue Corvette from earlier is gone, and Blaze’s car is parked near the front door.
Inside, Blaze is sitting at one of the tables talking to a man in a gray polo and jeans. Liam is up on a ladder, scrubbing the wooden ceiling with steel wool. I march across the hardwood floor and stop at the bottom of the ladder.
“It’s time to go home.”
Liam blows a curl off his forehead then glances back up at the roof. “Yes ma’am. I’m almost done. I just have a few boards left.”
I prop a hand on one hip. “Off the ladder and down here, Liam. Now.”
Blaze crosses the room, stopping right behind me. My stomach feels the tight pull it always does when he’s near. “Look, if this is about last night, don’t take it out on the kid. He’s got one more day of work then he never has to come here again. You never have to come here again.” His voice is low, almost a whisper, but still deep and controlled. His breath on my neck makes my nipples tighten against the lace of my bralette.
My body vibrates at the sound of his voice, but my anger is a buzzkill. “Oh my God, you are something. You think this is about us?” I spin around to face him. “Oh, right. There is no us. There’s only you.” Apparently, there are stages of rejection just like there are stages of grief. Last night, I felt sorry for myself. Right now, I’m just pissed.
He narrows his eyes. “Me? Did you even hear anything I said last night? I’m trying not to make this about me.”
“You know, last night during dinner I kept thinking to myself, how can two brothers be so different? But now it’s clear. You’re exactly the same. The only difference is that Levi flaunts his ego on the outside. You hide yours behind a charming smile.” Suddenly I’m ten feet tall and bulletproof. Blaze is two-hundred-some-odd pounds of pure muscle. I have to crane my neck to look up at him for crying out loud. What the hell am I thinking?
He grabs me by the arm, his fingers biting into my flesh. “Excuse me just a moment,” he says to a man sitting at one of the wooden tables studying a set of blueprints.
Liam watches us from the top of the ladder. Before I can tell him to get down here for the third time, I’m being hauled into an office behind the bar. Blaze closes the door behind us, slamming me against it. He holds my hands above my head and leans forward, caging me in. His eyes blaze with anger, frustration. Desire. Twin pools of molten copper as deep as the ocean I am drowning in. His scent, soft leather and clean laundry, sinks into me. I should fight him off, but I can’t force myself to do it.
“First things first. I am nothing like my brother. Nothing,” he grits out. “Is that clear?”
When I don’t answer the pulse in his neck throbs. I want to lick it. Like a wounded animal. I want to kiss him and make it better. Instead, I swallow my need and focus on his face.
He continues, his gaze searing through me. “Second, I did what I did last night because I’m trying to protect you.” He takes another step forward, contradicting his own words.
Protect me? From what? Multiple orgasms? My heart is protected, boarded up nice and tight. The only thing he can hurt is my pride.
I narrow my eyes. “Why? Because you think I’m not strong enough to handle casual sex between two consenting adults? Or because you think I’m one of your groupies that hangs out at the bar chomping at the bit for a minute of your attention?”
He glares at me, his nostrils flaring as he tries to control his breathing.
I fix my gaze on his. “I’m not weak, and I won’t beg. I’m not that woman.”
We stare at each other, chests heaving, breath panting, lips parted. His fingers flex around my wrists as if he’s struggling with the thought of letting me go.
He licks his lips as his gaze drops to my mouth. “I know you’re not. Fuck me. I know.”
His words are strangled, unguarded and guttural, and I feel him slipping. We’re both slipping… headfirst into insanity.
“I can’t slay your demons, Blaze. But I can make them quiet for a little while.” He releases my wrists, but I keep my hands above my head. He glides his fingertips down the length of my arms. A gentle touch from strong hands. Torture. Pure effing torture. He stops when he gets to my armpits, watching my chest heave.
He rests his forehead against mine, squeezing my shoulder blades and pulling my body to his. “Last night you said you were scared of me. The truth is I’m scared of me too. I’m afraid I can’t be careful with you.” Then he drops his hands and steps away.
“I don’t need you to be careful. I just need you to be ready. When you decide that’s good enough for you, you know where to find me.”
I should have kept my mouth shut. I should want to stay away from him.
I should.
But I don’t.
He lets me go without another word. The minute I step out of the office, my soul mourns the loss of him.
“Are you mad at me?” Liam asks on the drive home.
“We’ll talk about it when we get back to HoH.” My nerves are already a livewire. I don’t want to talk about the fire and get either one of us upset.
“Did I do something wrong?”
“We’re almost home, Liam. We’ll talk then.”
The road stretches for what seems like forever. My eyes focus on the painted lines in the middle of the interstate disappearing like candies on a conveyor belt. My head is in so many different places right now. I know from experience that the best way to stop feeling something is to stop thinking about it. I’m a master at compartmentalizing. I can put up walls like nobody’s business. That’s what I’m doing now, focusing on the sound of the tires on the asphalt, the feel of the leather-wrapped steering wheel, the way the sun shines through the windows and heats my skin, forcing my mind to be still. Liam doesn’t say anything else, and neither do I.
When we finally make it home and walk in the living room, Jake has the boys gathered around the coffee table, and he’s showing them ridiculous card tricks. This grown man looks so childlike and at ease. He looks up at me and smiles over the cards fanned out across the table in front of him. He never asked me why I needed him to come sit with the boys. He just showed up. Somewhere deep inside Jake there’s a good man waiting to come out—somewhere way down deep.