She started to stand up, but James stopped her. “W-Wait,” he said. “P-Please… wait. I am coming to think that without you, none of this would have been possible.”
Gaira paused, realizing that she was close to tears at the thought of leaving those letters behind.
Leaving James behind.
“I’m sure someone would have found them and sent them tae ye,” she said. “The Highlands are full of good people, in spite of what the English think.”
James was looking at her closely, as if seeing her through new eyes. “P-Perhaps someone would have,” he said. “B-But it’s equally possible they would have ended up in a hearth somewhere, burned to ashes, and I would have never known what you have been able to give me. It is the greatest kindness anyone has ever bestowed upon me.”
Gaira was trying hard not to weep so she lowered her gaze. “Ye’re welcome,” she said tightly. “As I said, I came tae know ye and yer brother very well. Ye deserve tae have peace between ye.”
“I-It is most thoughtful of you to say so,” he said, eyeing her. “B-But why do you seem so troubled now?”
Gaira couldn’t help it; she broke down in tears. “It’s foolish and it shouldna matter,” she said. “I’m only a serving wench at a place called Balthazar’s where patrons piss on the floor and try tae pinch my backside. I’m no one.”
James could see that she was upset and his focus shifted from his own grief to the woman’s obvious distress. “Y-You are wrong,” he said quietly. “Y-You are the woman who brought my brother back to me. That makes you very special.”
Her head snapped up and she looked at him, wishing with all her heart that his statement was true in a romantic sense. That wish removed any sense of restraint as she spoke. She figured that she’d never see the man again, so whatever she said was of little matter.
But she had to say it.
“I’ve lived my entire life in this dingy little village, with no excitement, no prospects, and no hope,” she said. “But my family wasna always impoverished. My grandfather was the Earl of Forth, a great advisor tae King James until he fell out of favor by taking one of the king’s mistresses as his own. My family was stripped of everything and we came here tae live, far away from king and court. My grandfather and father were learned men, so they eked out a life here, but when they died, it was only me and my mother and we do what we can tae survive.”
James was listening intently. “T-Then you’re the heiress to the Earldom of Forth?”
Tears were falling faster than she could wipe them away. “If it still belonged tae my family, aye,” she said. “I just thought ye should know that, once, our family fortunes were much as yer family’s. We were powerful and wealthy. The earldom had been in our family for centuries and it was taken away in the blink of an eye. I was educated by my grandfather, so I’m not like the other women in this village. I’m different. ’Tis a difficult existence here, much like yer own existence with yer brother. It is… complicated. ’Tis clear by yer letters that ye never felt as if ye fit in, or were worthy, and that’s something I can relate tae. I… I suppose in a sense, that’s why I felt drawn tae ye both through those letters. But I was drawn tae ye most of all.”
His expression softened. “W-Why me?”
She shrugged, unable to look at him. “Because ye’re tender,” she said. “The things ye wrote tae yer brother speak of a tender heart, a dreaming heart, and of a man who wants tae do right in life. So many men are hardened and cruel, but ye… ye have a soul. Ye’ve had challenges, but ye’ve not let them define ye. Do ye want tae know the truth? Yer letters took me out of my hellish existence and, for a moment, I could be by the side of a man who tried tae live the life he was born tae live. I dunna know if that makes sense, but it’s the truth. I fell in love with ye and I dunna even know ye, but now that I’ve met ye, I feel as if I’ve known ye all my life. I wasna going tae give those letters back because they were so important tae me, but I see now that they’re even more important tae ye. I’m sorry I kept them as long as I did and I pray ye can forgive me.”
She was looking down at the straw as she finished, preparing for the response sure to come. He would probably thank her for her candor and leave just as fast as he could. Only a madwoman would declare her love for a man she’d only come to know through letters.
But something strange happened.
Suddenly, he was sitting next to her and his fingers were under her chin, lifting her face to his. Gaira found herself looking into eyes the color of the sky, the slightly-bearded face creased into a smile. For a moment, he simply looked at her before kissing her gently on the cheek.
“L-Lady Gaira,” he addressed her formally, as would have been her right as an heiress. “T-The fact that the letters between my brother and me mean so much to you tells me that you are a woman of great depth and understanding. You knew what I needed when I did not even know. I feel that it would only be right to allow me to come to know you as you have come to know me. My brother said that he prayed for a guardian angel to watch over me. Do you think he meant you?”
She flushed a dull red, her heart thumping so forcefully against her chest that she could hardly breath. “Probably not,” she said, fighting off a grin. “I’ve never been called an angel before. A devil, perhaps, but not an angel.”
He smiled because she was. “I-I will call you an angel,” he said softly. “Y-You have become mine by reuniting me with my brother’s belongings.”
“But… but I should have done it sooner.”
“I-If you had simply sent them to me, I would not have had the honor of meeting you.”
There was that sweet man, the one she’d come to know in the letters. As she had told him, he had a tender side.
“Then perhaps everything happens for a reason,” she said. “Perhaps the reason was so we could speak.”
“I-I believe so,” he said. “A-And I believe something else.”
“What?”
“T-That you should come to Inverness with me,” he said. “A-After all, it seems to me that you have almost as much invested in this situation as I do. You read Johnny’s letters and you know the man, as you’ve said. Would you like to see this through? I am going to find the man in those letters you so carefully kept.”
Gaira was nodding her head before he even finished. “I would,” she said, incredulous that he should even ask. “Oh, I would!”
James took his hand off her chin, his eyes glimmering with mirth. “I-I am assuming that your mother would not be too keen on you accompanying me to Inverness, unchaperoned,” he said. “I-I would, of course, give you my word that I will behave respectfully and politely, but I would hazard to guess that your mother might not believe the word of a Sassenach.”
He said it with the perfect Gaelic inflection and Gaira grinned. “I’m a wicked lass for saying this, but she doesna have tae know.”
He cocked an eyebrow. “Y-You would lie to her?”
She shrugged. “Sometimes, I sleep at the tavern, in Carrie’s chamber,” she said. “Especially when it’s cold and we have an early morning the next day. My home is across the road, so ’tis not far, but sometimes it’s easier – and warmer – tae sleep in Carrie’s chamber. There have been times when I’ve not been home for a week.”