He smiled back at her. “I’m attached to you, too, Lee.” He almost told her that it felt like there were strings, too. Strings that tied her to his heart. But no. Better to leave talk of hearts out of this.
“And being attached to each other is okay, I think. But I guess the next safeguard is that we have to say no commitments, right?”
He held her gaze for a moment. He was seeing this as a commitment and a big one. But …
She shrugged. “You know what I mean. Neither of us is in a position to make any kind of commitment.”
“I guess not,” he agreed reluctantly. “But …” What the hell; he needed to say it. This evening had proved that to him. He’d go nuts if he didn’t ask for this. “I do need one commitment from you, Lee.”
“What?” She frowned, but if she couldn’t give him this, then it was a no-go for him.
“I need you to be mine.”
She didn’t understand, he could tell.
“No one else’s. Exclusive.” Jesus. He felt like an idiot. Wasn’t it supposed to be the girl who asked for that and the guy who tried to avoid it?
A wave of relief rushed over him when she smiled. “Oh. Of course. That didn’t even occur to me. Yeah. If we’re going to do this …” She let out a little laugh. “Then neither of us is doing it with anyone else.” Her smile faded. “That’s a commitment I’m happy to give you, and I expect you to do the same. That’s a deal breaker for me, Ryan. I’m putting all my trust in you—and you know how hard that is for me. I’ll accept if your job makes it too difficult. I’ll accept if you change your mind and tell me. But the one thing I ask you is that you don’t screw around on me. Okay?”
“I promise.”
“I’ll hate you if you break that promise.”
He nodded solemnly. “And you’d have every reason to. I get it.” He raised an eyebrow. He needed to hear her say it back.
“And I promise you the same.”
He slung his arm around her shoulders as they continued on their way. He’d never been one for public displays of affection, but with Leanne, it didn’t matter. He didn’t even notice where they were, but as they walked on, he was surprised at himself for stopping and kissing on the street like that.
Chapter Thirteen
“Well, that’s it for the year,” said Dan as the three of them walked out of the exam hall. He grinned at Ryan. “That’s it, all finished and done for you, isn’t it?”
“It sure is.” He glanced at Leanne. He almost wished that he still had another year of study ahead of him like she and Dan did. But he wasn’t a student. He already had his career. This semester had been an assignment for him, nothing more.
She smiled at him. “Yeah. You get to go back and take it easy in the real world while we have to study our asses off for one more year.”
He had to laugh. She knew that in his version of the real world, nothing was easy. But he knew where she was coming from. The final year of law school was going to be a heavy load for her. He’d been amazed by how much time she’d managed to spend with him. Law students were usually the ones who spent twenty hours a day studying. Leanne sure didn’t, but as she’d told him when they first met, she was top of most of her classes.
“When do you leave?” asked Dan.
That brought him back down to earth. He slung his arm around Leanne’s shoulders, drawing her into his side. “I have to go on Sunday. I’m back at work on Monday.”
“In DC?” Dan asked.
“Yeah.” He felt bad. It wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the whole truth either. He’d told Leanne he was going back to DC and he was. But he’d only be stopping there for a couple days before his next assignment.
“Dan!”
They all turned at the sound of a woman’s voice calling him. It was that Olivia chick who always seemed to be hanging around him. Ryan didn’t like her, and he knew Leanne didn’t. He was amused to see Dan’s ears and neck turn red. Hey, if he liked the girl, that was his choice. Ryan just hoped that she wouldn’t get her claws too deep into him. He was too nice a guy.
He gave them a sheepish smile. “I’ll catch up with you guys later. Are we still going for drinks to celebrate?”
“We are,” said Leanne. “You can bring her if you like.”
Dan dropped his gaze and mumbled, “Thanks,” before going to Olivia.
Once he was out of earshot, Ryan hugged Leanne closer to him. “I thought you didn’t like her.”
She let out a harsh little laugh. “I can’t stand the girl. And I don’t trust her. But if Dan likes her, then I’d rather support him … and keep an eye on her.”
“You’re soft with the people you care about.”
She looked up at him. “I guess, but then so are you.”
He frowned. He didn’t think of himself as soft in any way.
She laughed. “You are, admit it.”
He rolled his eyes. “I’m not.”
“You are!”
He turned her to face him and pulled her against him, so that she could feel the one part of him that didn’t like to be soft whenever he was around her. “Do I feel soft to you?”
She laughed. “Nope. I suppose you want me to help you out with that? We both know I can make you soft again.”
He laughed with her. “Hmm. You have a point there. What did you have in mind?”
She brought her hand up to stroke her chin as if she needed to think about it, but then slid her thumb into her mouth and sucked on it before slowly pulling her bottom lip down as she pulled it out. “I’m sure I’ll think of something.”
He took hold of her hand and started marching her back toward the parking lot. “Deal, and I’ll even admit that I’m soft when you’ve finished.”
~ ~ ~
The last few days before Ryan had to leave flew by all too quickly. When Leanne woke up on Sunday morning, she snuggled against him, wishing he didn’t have to go.
His arm closed around her and held her closer. She wanted to speak, but she didn’t know what to say. She wanted to tell him that she’d understand if he changed his mind. But she’d told him that so many times already that he’d asked if she was trying to push him away. Another part of her wanted to tell him that she was going to miss him so much. But she couldn’t do that either. She didn’t want to put him under that kind of pressure.
He brushed her hair away from the back of her neck and nibbled, sending shivers chasing each other down her spine.
She rolled over to face him, and her breath caught in her chest when she saw the look on his face. His eyes were filled with pain. “What’s wrong?”
He gave her a sad smile. “You really don’t know?”
Her heart slammed to a halt. Was he going to tell her that he’d changed his mind? Did he think she was expecting it? She wasn’t! But she could take it. She shook her head slowly, hoping that she’d be able to hold in the tears. It wouldn’t be fair of her to cry.